Thou Art That
It started out as joke comments. Thank G-d for secular humanism. ~ You’re welcome. PG got to thinking, and wondered what the punch line was. Is there a difference between G-d and man?
Zen and the art of motorcycle repair says that the division of G-d and man, subject and object, is the dirty work of Aristotle. PG is not philosophically grounded enough to know, but suspects that unity is better than division. Is the earth a unified whole, “thou art that”?
Now, the truth just might be that G-d is separate from man. While unity may sound appealing, it might not be the way things operate. Just because a belief makes you happy does not mean that it is true. Let no man bring together what G-d has rent asunder.
If there is a division between G-d and man, then where does the boundary lie?
Pictures are from “The Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library”.
This is a repost. Is it art?
Tussit Chronicles 011223
@jordanbpeterson “Just another reason to spend tens of thousands a year to send your kids to university… “@GailHeriot “Another perfectly good word is being canceled: The USC School of Social Work is nixing the word “field” as in “field work” & “going into the field.” USC thinks this has something to do with white supremacy. Please stop.” Pictures from The Library of Congress.
The document in question is rather festive. The Daily Trojan reports: “A department of USC’s school of social work said in a press release Tuesday that it will no longer use the phrases “field work” and “going into the field” in its curriculum, instead replacing them with “practicum.” The department said the change is meant to support its anti-racist social work. … Language can be powerful, and phrases such as ‘going into the field’ or ‘field work’ may have connotations for descendants of enslaved people and immigrant workers that are not benign”
Content Warning: This paragraph will link to definitions that include a six letter word. Since I want to live this weekend, I am not going to use the expression. As a substitute, I am going to say pock. … There are two phrases to consider, field pock and house pock. Per Urban Dictionary: Field Pock “Pock that works in the field all day picking cotton instead of working inside like a house pock.” House Pock “A black person that does their best to please white people even if it means disowning their own racial identity.” House Pock is not a compliment.
“The house Negro always looked out for his master. … he didn’t want his master hurt. If the master got sick, he’d say, “What’s the matter, boss, we sick?” … When the master’s house caught afire, he’d try and put the fire out. … he was more defensive of it than the master was … But then you had some field Negroes … They felt the sting of the lash. They hated their master. … If the master got sick, they’d pray that the master died. If the master’s house caught afire, they’d pray for a strong wind to come along. … And today you still have house Negroes and field Negroes. I’m a field Negro.” Malcolm X
“We know that changing terminology can be challenging, and a complete transition will take some time, but we thank you in advance for joining us in this effort and for your patience as we transition.” This is the last sentence of the “practicum” memo. As we all know, transition is a process. A person is assigned a gender at birth. At a certain point in their evolution, this person will come to live in the gender that fits them better. This process is known as a transition. It is the root word of trans.
I was on youtube, and saw a video with Gore Vidal in 2011. He looked like death warmed over. I went to wikipedia for details, and saw that the gentleman (voice typing calls him Gore the doll) died in 2012. Wikiwaki has a few details about a feud Mr. Vidal had with Truman Capote, with a festive quote from Jackie O’s sister. Wikiwanker had a footnote to the source of this quote: At 92, Liz Smith Reveals How Rupert Murdoch Fired Her, What It Felt Like to Be Outed The story ran April 8, 2015.
Mary Elizabeth Smith “Bette Midler was pretty tough on me early on. I ran something about her dating some actor. And she called me up, furious, saying, “I don’t want to be in your f—ing column!” Which was an odd thing to hear from someone just starting a career in show business. The funny thing is, I love Bette now. She’s amazing, but she’s a volatile person. Remember the guy she was with? The funny guy with the grand piano?” Hollywood Reporter “Barry Manilow?”MES “That’s him. I used to go see them at the Continental Baths! But that partnership didn’t end so well.”
HR “You had a legendary aversion to Jackie O.’s sister, Princess Lee Radziwill. What was it that set you off?” MES ”Well, she did something terrible. She was always a close friend of Truman Capote‘s. But then Capote got embroiled in that ridiculous libel suit with Gore Vidal over his claim that Vidal had been drunkenly kicked out of the White House. Lee is the one who told Capote the story, but when it ended up in court, she threw him to the wolves. All she had to do was tell the truth. But she refused, and Truman lost the lawsuit, which devastated him. During the trial, as a last-ditch effort, he asked me to call her and beg her to testify. And you know, Truman had done everything for her. He even tried to help her start an acting career. But when I called her and said, “Lee, you really must testify for Truman,” she said, “Oh, Liz, what do we care; they’re just a couple of fags! They’re disgusting.” I was so stunned, I just hung up. I’ve never spoken to her since.”
HR Donald Trump … MES “I was just appalled by his treatment of Ivana! She came to me shortly after he dumped her, and she was beside herself. I said, “Look, everybody’s had a love affair where they’re rejected. It takes about two years to get over it — less if you see a psychiatrist.” I was touched by Ivana, so I spoke up for her. But, in the end, their fight wasn’t about betrayal. It was about money. She was as greedy as he was. It was a great story about nothing. But it made me world famous.”
HR Madonna … MES “She’s an extremely talented, deeply complicated woman. We were close for a while, or as close as anyone can get to her. The first time we met, she glowered at me and said, “Aren’t you scared of me?” I just laughed. We got along real well after that.”
Tussit Chronicles 010323
I woke up. Today is the third day of the new year. The 2023 plan is to try intermittent fasting for a month, and see how I feel. Today is the third day. It is one thing to say what you are going to do. It is another to actually do it.
IF changes your relationship with food. The plan now is to eat from 2pm until 10 pm. The internet folks say to go from 1-9. I like to eat a late night bowl of oatmeal, to promote regularity. This may change as we continue.
@BkL0v “all good news about Damar Hamlin so far – despite the scary cardiac arrest and 9min CPR, his vitals are good, they restarted his heart, now they say he’s in stable condition. he’a gonna play football again! just watch !!!!” … The twitter news this morning is about a football player collapsing last night. The word is that many COVID vaccinated people have fallen over dead recently. There will be no way to prove/disprove that the vaxx caused these sudden deaths.
I am vaxxed. When they became widely available, I was skeptical, but not enough of a rebel to abstain. It is becoming apparent that the deep state government rushed the vaxx into mass distribution without adequate testing. The pandemic was seen as an emergency, and extreme measures were taken. The national debt spiraled out of control. Children essentially took a year off from school. We will be dealing with the quote/unquote cure a lot longer than we dealt with the disease.
Why do I continue to write these dispatches, when few people are reading? Last year, I wrote two posts about why I enjoy listening to Joseph James Rogan. The facebook friend who trashed JJR deleted the link. When I looked at the stats a few days later, NOBODY had read the post. Writing these dispatches is fun, and may elicit some worthwhile commentary. The fact that nobody is reading should not be a problem. The only expense is my time.
Why does the caged bird sing? I have heard that line for years, but am starting to understand it. The caged bird sings because he enjoys it. He does not care if you enjoy his tunes, or if you are annoyed by it. If you want to ignore me, that is easier than filtering out a bird that will not quit singing.
I have heard the line about the caged bird for years, but never read the poem that inspired it. It turns out Maya Angelou is not talking about a privileged white man expressing his wonderful thoughts on the information superhighway. The metaphor still works. If some fuddy duddy wants to cry racist cultural appropriation, that is their privilege. In the meantime, I will look for another metaphor.
The Rogan posts mentioned above deal with the COVID clusterfuck. “JRE does tackle serious issues. You should listen, and think for yourself. I heard about 45 minutes of the Robert Malone episode. A great deal of it was nonsense. One that rang true was the government prioritizing vaccines over treatment, with disastrous results. Typical is this story: Experts say monoclonal antibody treatment is not a substitute for COVID-19 vaccines.”
“The suspicion is that the covid industrial complex does not want you to think critically. The idea is to be good little sheep. Get the vaccine, wear a mask, and watch the government borrow $3t a year. Talk trash about anyone who does not salute the Pfizer-flag. When a popular entertainer questions the status quo, he must be ridiculed, along with anyone who listens.
Pictures today are by chamblee 54. These are haiku pictures, another underappreciated expression. You take a bit of text, usually off twitter or facebook. Highlight the words you want to keep, in the 5 beat-7 beat-5 beat format. Filter out the remaining text. Have a nice day.
White Supremacy Workout
“The White Supremacist Origins of Exercise, and 6 Other Surprising Facts About the history of fitness in America.” turned up on twitter this morning. The article was promotion for a book, Fit Nation: The Gains and Pains of America’s Exercise Obsession. The book is coming out February 2, 2023. There are no one star comments available.
Time magazine had an interview with author Natalis Mehlman Petrzela. “It was super interesting reading the reflections of fitness enthusiasts in the early 20th century. They said we should get rid of corsets, corsets are an assault on women’s form, and that women should be lifting weights and gaining strength. At first, you feel like this is so progressive.”
“Then you keep reading, and they’re saying white women should start building up their strength because we need more white babies. They’re writing during an incredible amount of immigration, soon after enslaved people have been emancipated. This is totally part of a white supremacy project. So that was a real “holy crap” moment as a historian, where deep archival research really reveals the contradictions of this moment.”
Hopefully, the finished book will have more information about who “they” is. Until then, we are stuck with those few sentences. Is exercise a white supremacist activity? It looks like WS has become another clickbait gimmick. Take a fluff article about an upcoming book, put WS in the headline, and get oodles of eyeballs. @TIME apparently is not concerned that the next headline to trumpet WS will have less impact. The wolf is back, bigger and meaner than ever.
Comments to the Time tweet included a link to Racist Roots of Fighting Obesity. This article was originally published in Scientific American. Authors include Lindo Bacon (formerly Linda), and Sabrina Strings, author of Fearing the Black Body: The Racial Origins of Fat Phobia.
“This heightened concern about their weight is not new; it reflects the racist stigmatization of Black women’s bodies. … In the eyes of many medical practitioners in the late 19th century, Black women were destined to die off along with the men of their race because of their presumed inability to control their “animal appetites”—eating, drinking and fornicating. … Today the idea that weight is the main problem dogging Black women builds on these historically racist ideas and ignores how interrelated social factors impact Black women’s health. It also perpetuates a misinformed and damaging message about weight and health. Indeed, social determinants have been shown to be more consequential to health than BMI or health behaviors. …” (Does BMI outweigh BLM?)
“Doctors often tell fat people that dietary control leading to weight loss is the solution to their health problems. But many studies show that the stigma associated with body weight, rather than the body weight itself, is responsible for some adverse health consequences blamed on obesity, including increased mortality risk. Regardless of income, Black women consistently experience weightism in addition to sexism and racism. From workplace discrimination and poor service at restaurants to rude or objectifying commentary online, the stress of these life experiences contributes to higher rates of chronic mental and physical illnesses …”
“A 2018 opinion piece in the journal BMC Medicine argued that bias against fat people is actually a larger driver of the so-called obesity epidemic than adiposity itself. A 2015 study … found that people who reported experiencing weight discrimination had a 60 percent increased risk of dying, independent of BMI (and therefore regardless of body size). … Simply blaming Black women’s health conditions on “obesity” ignores these critically important sociohistorical factors. It also leads to a prescription long since proved to be ineffective: weight loss. … This weight-focused paradigm fails to produce thinner or healthier bodies but succeeds in fostering weight stigma.”
When I tried to retweet the @sciam link, twitter shook a finger in my face. “Want to read the article first? You’re about to share an article you haven’t opened on Twitter.” As it turned out, I opened the article in another browser, away from Elon’s watchful eye. It will be interesting to see if this happens again, with a less provocative article. Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
Tulsi Clickbait
This is a repost from 2019. Tulsi Gabbard and Return of Anti-Anti-Trump Left This link turned up on facebook. “I’ve read assertions from credible sources (Clinton et al) that Gabbard is a Russian asset. That and her anti-gay past that she suddenly disavowed are causes for concern.”
The “anti gay past” was news to PG. A quick trip to google turned up an article, Gabbard says deploying to the Middle East changed her views on LGBT rights PG replied, “Whatever her shortcomings, Ms. Gabbard has made opposition to regime change wars the focus of her campaign. I can see where this would be disturbing to “credible sources (Clinton et al)”. Remember who is financed by the military industrial complex.” The rest of the thread was facebook back and forth. It ended before anyone made a Hitler comparison.
@NYMag “The stage is set for Tulsi Gabbard to play the role of 2020’s Jill Stein. @jonathanchait writes” This turned up on twitter a bit later. PG decided to take the plunge, and read the article.
1163 words later, PG had a headache. The pastel prose went off on unfathomable tangents, like “Some anti-anti-Trump leftists see impeachment not merely as a distraction from the Sanders revolution but a deliberate effort to marginalize it.”
PG began to wonder. Where was the Gabbard anti-gay rhetoric? For that matter, where was Tulsi, period. PG copied the article into a word document. He replaced “Gabbard” with “GABBARD.” Out of 1163 words, Gabbard appears three times. The last Gabbard sighting was in the third paragraph.
The article is not about Tulsi Gabbard. It is a barely comprehensible @jonathanchait rant about the evils of the incorrect resistance. Tulsi Gabbard has become clickbait. Her candidacy struggles to stay afloat. She has become a renegade who must be shamed. At the same time, Ms. Gabbard is well known enough for her picture to harvest eyeballs.
Tulsi Gabbard preaches opposition to regime change wars. These wars have killed hundreds of thousands of Muslims, while enriching the Hillary military-industrial complex. The merchants of death can easily afford to pay pundits to slime inconvenient candidates. And to use this candidate as the attention magnet, for some half witted rambling on the 2020 election.
Pictures today are from The Library of Congress.
58 Things To Be Grateful For







There is a meme going on, 50 Happy Things: Bloggers Unite in Flood of Gratitude. PG heard about it from Rochelle Wisoff-Fields, the perpetrator of Friday Fictioneers. The idea is to set a timer for ten minutes, and write a list of fifty things you are grateful for, or that made you happy.
It has been a slow year for writing contests at chamblee54. In August of 2014, a poem, Whitehall Street, was published. Almost immediately, an email came from the yeah write writing contest. Apparently, a line had been crossed, and chamblee54 was no longer permitted to participate in the contest. PG has been slow to find another writing contest to catch his fancy. It should be noted that on the list that follows, you will not find political correctness, sjw, or judgmental bullies.
PG read the description of the contest, and realized that he needed to participate. The resulting list might make good text for a graphic poem. At the very least, the list is good text to go between pictures, from “The Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library”. The remarkable photo collections that PG has acess to (the other one is The Library of Congress ) are a source of enjoyment. They did not make the list by name.
This is the way the list is. It is not supposed to be comprehensive. As soon as PG set the kitchen timer for ten minutes, he realized a touch of gratitude for this clanging device. It is the first item. Only three people names made the list, which is definitely not a reflection on the many wonderful people who were not named. (One of these names mentioned is a single letter, enclosed by quote marks. Not everyone has a friend like that.) There are a few catch alls, like healthy body, rather than naming all the parts. These parts work better than a man of PG’s age, and experience, has a right to expect.
So anyway, maybe we should just quit blabbering and print the list. There are a total of sixty one, one for each year of this life. These are not numbered… numbering them takes time away from writing down more. They are in groups of ten, in the order that they were written. UPDATE: Thinking was mentioned three times, and reading twice. Maybe editing should have been listed, or at least performed. The new total is 58 items.
kitchen timer, Mac, “J”, Robert, running honda, knees, back, teeth, feet, dick
rest of body, skepticism, sobriety, sense of wonder, computers, photography, gimp, WordPress blog, other peoples dogs, black people
mexicans, reading, thinking, faeries, short mountain, bicycle, house with roof, rain, america, georgia
georgia natives, clothes, foam rubber pad mattress, sleeping platform, sticker pictures, any friends not mentioned, not being broke, good health, listening, batteries
phones, internet, pain medicine, memory of mom and dad, food, anything i don’t think of in ten minutes, freedom from religion, g-d, back yard, rocks
poetry, soap, golden rectangle, being queer, not numbering, not wondering if i have enough, not getting caught dui, freedom from the press, reposting old features








Loving Kindness Meditation
I was introduced to “Loving Kindness Meditation” (LKM) a while back. It is fairly basic. You think of someone, who we will call Gnarlene Johnson. You say, or think, “I want Gnarlene to be happy.” You think about it for a breath or two, then you say “I want Gnarlene to be healthy.”
I took the concept, and made it a four parter. Breathing is essential to the process, as is taking enough time for the wishes to sink in. Inhale. I want Gnarlene to be happy. Inhale. I want Gnarlene to be healthy. Inhale. I want Gnarlene to be prosperous. Inhale. I want Gnarlene to be safe.
Does anyone really benefit from LKM? Outside of a certain sense of serenity/well being, not really. This is not being done with the hope of rewards, outside of feeling better for the time it takes to breathe four times. If you become happy/healthy/prosperous/safe (HHPS), that is a good outcome.
LKM has a few similarities with the dreaded “pray for you.” It is easy to see how one could confuse the two. The LKM breather is not consciously trying to impart blessings upon the recipient of HHPS. It is not necessary, or even desirable, to tell the recipient they are having HHPS wished for them. This person is a conduit, through which blessings might flow back to you. Humility is a gift.
One way I have been doing LKM is at the gym. A sauna is a good place to slow down, focus on breathing, and take in the heat. I will see a man, whose name I almost never know. I will chose a way to identify him. An item of clothing works nicely.
Inhale. I want blue shorts to be happy. Inhale. I want blue shorts to be healthy. Inhale. I want blue shorts to be prosperous. Inhale. I want blue shorts to be safe. You don’t need to tell him.
So this is the LKM practice. No claims are made, except that LKM will not hurt you. My guess is that God has more important things to think about than someone wishing HHPS on a total stranger. Pictures today are from The Library of Congress.
CK7 Hot Dog
Hot Dog “3 – verb to perform in a conspicuous or often ostentatious manner especially : to perform fancy stunts and maneuvers (as while surfing or skiing).” A hot dog is more than a sandwich. Show offs have been called hot dog for a long time. This is a repost. Pictures today are from “The Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library”.
Which brings us to Colin Kaepernick. PG has thought there was something fishy about #7 since his protest began in 2016. What would happen if you google “Colin Kaepernick Hot Dog”?
In 2013, after the Niners beat the Falcons in the NFC championship game, a restaurant in Turlock, CA, held a contest to name a hot dog in honor of the Niners young quarterback. “Kaepernick Special: Hot dog wins competition in Turlock Colin Kaepernick is a hot dog. That’s not a critique of the quarterback’s playing style; that’s a fact. The Kaepernick Special made its first appearance on the menu at Main Street Footers Thursday. The restaurant, a mainstay in downtown Turlock for decades, held a contest to come up with a hot dog named for the former Pitman High football standout. … Football and hot dog aficionados submitted a variety of ideas … One suggestion: a hot dog topped with crab, shrimp and cocktail sauce. … Jim Yettman, 76, said he entered the contest “on a whim” … Yettman’s concoction: A hot dog with chili, cabbage, red and yellow bell peppers, jalapeños and a secret sauce consisting of mustard, horseradish, thousand island dressing, and cayenne pepper. … He beat out a pulled pork-topped hot dog and a pizza-themed version with pepperoni and olives.”
As you may have heard, Mr. Kaepernick sat down during the National Anthem, before a 2016 pre-season game. One of the first casualties, in the uproar that followed, was the CK7 hot dog. “A hot dog named in honor of Colin Kaepernick at a restaurant in his hometown of Turlock, Calif., no longer is available. The hot dog called CK7 — Kaepernick’s initials followed by his jersey number — has been pulled off the menu at Main Street Footers after the San Francisco 49ers quarterback refused to stand for the national anthem before a preseason game against the Green Bay Packers on Friday. The hot dog that was topped with chili, coleslaw, jalapenos and “Kaep Sauce’’ was a hot item for $6.05 when Kaepernick helped lead the 49ers to the Super Bowl after the 2012 season but had become a “political football,’’ restaurant co-owner Glenn Newsum said.”
In 2016, the Carolina Panthers were coming off an NFC championship. Their star quarterback, Cam Newton, gave an interview with GQ, and said some controversial things. After the Niners played the Panthers, Mr. Kapernick and Mr. Newton were photographed together. Some twitter wits speculated about what was said. @TribalThrasher “Kaep: A hot dog isn’t a sandwhich.. Cam: SQUARE UP”
Don’t be surprised if a google search for “dog” yields a story featuring Mike Vick. “Colin Kaepernick tweets Stockholm Syndrome definition after Michael Vick advises him to get a haircut Recently retired NFL quarterback Michael Vick has some advice for Colin Kaepernick, who is still looking for a job after opting out of his contract with the San Francisco 49ers in March. “First thing we gotta get Colin to do is cut his hair,” Vick said Monday. … (photo comment) Kaepernick had short, neatly cut hair when he led the 49ers to the Super Bowl following the 2012 season. But before last season, he grew it all out, often sporting a large Afro or sometimes cornrows. … “Just go clean cut, you know? Why not?” said Vick, who sometimes wore his own hair in an Afro or cornrows in his younger days. … “The most important thing that he needs to do is just try to be presentable.” … it’s not the Colin Kaepernick that we’ve known since he entered the NFL. … I love the guy to death and I want him also to succeed on and off the field. … “He is a great kid and the reason he’s not playing has nothing to do with the national anthem, I think it’s more solely on his play.” … In what some are interpreting as a response to Vick’s comments, Kaepernick took to Twitter and Instagram on Tuesday morning and posted the definition of Stockhom Syndrome.”
How To Write Good
Avoid Alliteration. Always. ~ Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
Avoid cliches like the plague. (They re old hat.) ~ Employ the vernacular.
Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc. ~ Contractions aren’t necessary.
Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
It is wrong to ever split an infinitive. ~ Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
One should never generalize. ~ Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
Profanity sucks. ~ Be more or less specific. ~ Eliminate quotations.
As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.”
Don’t be redundant; don’t use more words than necessary; it s highly superfluous.
One word sentences? Eliminate. ~ Understatement is always best.
Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
The passive voice is to be avoided. ~ Who needs rhetorical questions?
Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
Parenthetical words however must be enclosed in commas.
It behooves you to avoid archaic expressions.
Avoid archaeic spellings too. ~ Subject and verb always has to agree.
Don’t repeat yourself, or say again what you have said before.
Don’t use commas, that, are not, necessary.
Do not use hyperbole; not one in a million can do it effectively.
Never use a big word when a diminutive alternative would suffice.
Placing a comma between subject and predicate, is not correct.
Use youre spell chekker to avoid mispeling and to catch typograhpical errers.
Don’t repeat yourself, or say again what you have said before.
Use the apostrophe in it’s proper place and omit it when its not needed.
Don’t never use no double negatives. ~ Don’t overuse exclamation marks!!
Hopefully, you will use words correctly, irregardless of how others use them.
Eschew obfuscation. ~ No sentence fragments.
Don’t indulge in sesquipedalian lexicological constructions.
A writer must not shift your point of view.
Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences,
as of 10 or more words, to their antecedents.
Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.
If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing.
Always pick on the correct idiom. ~ The adverb always follows the verb.
Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing metaphors.
Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky. ~ If you reread your work,
you can find on rereading a great deal of repetition can be by rereading and editing.
Poofread carefully to see if you any words out. ~ And always be sure to finish what
Pictures are from The Library of Congress. This is a repost.
The men were Union Soldiers, during the War Between the States.
How to Write Good is borrowed from a US Government publication.
She Is Nursing The Baby Jesus
The story below was found at the website of James Petras . HT to palestinianpundit. Pictures are from The Library of Congress. This is a repost.
The settlements were still being built, financed mostly by Jewish money from America, contributions from Wall Street speculators and owners of gambling dens. “Good thing”, Joseph thought, “we have a few sheep and olive trees and Mary keeps some chickens. But Joseph worried, “cheese and olives are not enough to feed a growing boy. Mary is due to deliver our son any day”. His dreams foretold of a sturdy son working alongside of him…multiplying loaves and fish.
The settlers looked down on Joseph. He rarely attended shul, and on the high holidays, he would show up late to avoid the tithe. Their simple cottage was located in a nearby ravine with water from a stream, which flowed year round. It was choice real estate for any settlement expansion. So when Joseph fell behind on his property tax, the settlers took over their home, forcibly evicted Joseph and Mary and offered them a one-way bus ticket to Jerusalem. Joseph, born and raised in the arid hills, fought back and bloodied not a few settlers with his labor-hardened fists. But in the end he sat, battered on their bridal bed under the olive tree, in black despair. Mary, much the younger, felt the baby’s movements. Her time was near. “We have to find shelter, Joseph, we have to move on …this is no time for revenge”, she pleaded. Joseph, who believed with the Old Testament prophets in an “eye for an eye”, reluctantly agreed. So it was that Joseph sold their sheep, chickens and other belongings to an Arab neighbor and bought a donkey and cart. He loaded up the mattress, some clothes, cheese, olives and eggs and they set out for the Holy City.
The donkey path was rocky and full of potholes. Mary winced at every bump; she worried that it would harm the baby. Worse, this was the road for the Palestinians with military checkpoints everywhere. No one ever told Joseph that, as a Jew, he could have taken a smooth paved road – forbidden to the Arabs. At the first roadblock Joseph saw a long line of Arabs waiting. Pointing to his very pregnant wife, Joseph asked the Palestinians, half in Arabic, half in Hebrew, if they could go ahead. A path was opened and the couple went forward. A young soldier raised his rifle and told Mary and Joseph to get down from the cart. Joseph descended and nodded to his wife’s stomach. The soldier smirked and turned to his comrades, “The old Arab knocks up the girl he bought for a dozen sheep and now he wants a free pass”. Joseph, red with anger, shouted in rough Hebrew, “I am a Jew. But unlike you … I respect pregnant women”. The soldier poked Joseph with his rifle and ordered him to step back: “You are worse than an Arab – you’re an old Jew who screws Arab girls”. Mary frightened by the exchange turned to her husband and cried, “Stop Joseph or he will shoot you and our baby will be born an orphan”.
With great difficulty, Mary got down from the wagon. An officer came out of the guard station, summoning a female soldier, “Hey Judi, go feel under her dress, she might be carrying bombs” “What’s the matter? Don’t you like to feel them yourself anymore? ” Judith barked back in Brooklyn-accented Hebrew. While the soldiers argued, Mary leaned on Joseph for support. Finally, the soldiers came to an agreement. “Pull-up your dress and slip”, Judith ordered. Mary blanched in shame. Joseph faced the gun in disgrace. The soldiers laughed and pointed at Mary’s swollen breasts, joking about an unborn terrorist with Arab hands and a Jewish brain.
Joseph and Mary continued on the way to the Holy City. They were frequently detained at the checkpoints along the way. Each time they suffered another delay, another indignity and more gratuitous insults spouted by Sephardim and Ashkenazi, male and female, secular and religious – all soldiers of the Chosen people. It was dusk when Mary and Joseph finally reached the Wall. The gates had closed for the night. Mary cried out in pain, “Joseph, I can feel the baby coming soon. Please do something quickly”. Joseph panicked. He saw the lights of a small village nearby and, leaving Mary on the cart, Joseph ran to the nearest house and pounded on the door. A Palestinian woman opened the door slightly and peered into the dark, agitated face of Joseph. “Who are you? What do you want?” “I am Joseph, a carpenter from the hills of Hebron. My wife is about to give birth and I need shelter to protect Mary and the baby”. Pointing to Mary on the donkey cart, Joseph pleaded in his strange mixture of Hebrew and Arabic.
“Well, you speak like a Jew but you look like an Arab,” the Palestinian woman said laughing as she walked back with him to the cart. Mary’s face was contorted with pain and fear: her contractions were more frequent and intense. The woman ordered Joseph to bring the cart around to a stable where the sheep and chickens were kept. As soon as they entered, Mary cried out in pain and the Palestinian woman, who had now been joined by a neighbor midwife, swiftly helped the young mother down onto a bed of straw. And thus the child was born, as Joseph watched in awe.
It came to pass that shepherds, returning from their fields, heard the mingled cries of birth and joy and hurried to the stable carrying both their rifles and fresh goat milk, not knowing whether it was friend or foe, Jew or Arab. When they entered the stable and beheld the mother and infant, they put aside their weapons and offered the milk to Mary who thanked them in both Hebrew and Arabic. And the shepherds were amazed and wondered: Who were these strange people, a poor Jewish couple, who came in peace on a donkey cart inscribed with Arabic letters?
The news quickly spread about the strange birth of a Jewish child just outside the Wall in a Palestinian’s stable. Many neighbors entered and beheld Mary, the infant and Joseph. Meanwhile, Israeli soldiers, equipped with night vision goggles, reported from their watchtowers overlooking the Palestinian neighborhood, “The Arabs are meeting just outside the Wall, in a stable, by candle light”. The gates under the watchtowers flew open and armored carriers with bright lights followed by heavily armed solders drove out and surrounded the stable, the assembled villagers and the Palestinian woman’s house. A loud speaker blared, “Come out with your hands up or we’ll shoot.” Joseph stepped forward with his hands stretched out to the sky and spoke, “My wife, Mary cannot comply with your order. She is nursing the baby Jesus”
Judy Roasting On An Open Fire
SFFILK (Not his real name) passes along a story about Mel Tormé. It seems like Mr.Tormé was eating a leisurely breakfast at a food court in Los Angeles, and a quartet appeared singing Christmas songs. They wound up performing “The Christmas Song” for co- author Tormé … and the singers had no idea who he was. It is a good story, better told in the link. This is a repost, with pictures from “The Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library”.
According to the inerrant Wikipedia, Mr. Tormé collaborated with Robert Wells, until they had a falling out. One afternoon, on the hottest day of July in 1945, Mr.Tormé went to visit Mr.Wells, and saw the first four lines of “The Christmas Song” (including “Chestnuts roasting on an open fire, Jack Frost nipping at your nose”). The lines were on a note pad, and the two agreed to beat the heat of summer by completing the song. Supposedly, Mr. Tormé did not like the song very much. After three divorces, he probably didn’t see many of the royalties.
Mel Tormé was the music director of the ill fated “Judy Garland Show” in the early sixties. He wrote a book about it… The Other Side of the Rainbow: With Judy Garland on the Dawn Patrol . The story is that Miss Garland would get blasted, call Mr.Tormé in the middle of the night, and pour out her troubles. (This review is much less sympathetic towards Mr. Tormé.) While the show did not last longer, there are some great youtube clips left over.
Cynic
“A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything, and the value of nothing.” ― Oscar Wilde. This quote is one of Oscar’s greatest hits. If you think about it for a minute, it is not totally accurate. You are not supposed to think. Quoting Oscar Fingal O’Flahertie Wills Wilde is about sounding clever, not making sense. Did he really create that definition of a cynic? This is a repost.
Oscar Wilde is a quote magnet. This is more than something you put on your refrigerator. When people hear something clever, odds are good that Oscar will get the blame. As Dorothy Parker wrote: “If, with the literate, I am, Impelled to try an epigram, I never seek to take the credit; We all assume that Oscar said it. [Life Magazine, June 2, 1927]”
Wikiquote says this line is from Act III of Lady Windermere’s Fan. It was spoken by Lord Darlington. Did the play write intend for the line to be taken seriously, or was he making the character look foolish by saying it? With Oscar Wilde, it could be both of these things at the same time.
Principle Four, of the four principles of quotations, reads “Only quote from works that you have read.” In the case of Lady Windemere’s Fan, this would mean a youtube video of the play. There is a posh BBC production available. You don’t have to watch the cell phone recording of high school players.
Lady Windemere’s Fan is a production where upper class Brits say clever things in glorious costumes. Nobody ever goes to the bathroom, or looks less than perfect. Lady Windemere’s six month old child is neither seen, nor heard. Lady Windemere finds out her husband, Lord Windemere, is having an affair with a Mrs. Erlynne. The Lord proceeds to invite the floozy to Lady Windemere’s birthday party.
After the party, the men go to their club, then to Lord Darlington’s room. There are five men in the conversation, beginning with Lord Windemere. Lord Darlington has just told Lady Windemere that he loves her, and wants her to run off with him. Lady Windemere said no. Lord Augustus is a suitor of Mrs. Erlynne, and is begging her to marry him. Cecil Graham, and Mr. Dumby, wear their splendid costumes with conviction.
The scene starts with the men saying clever things, most of them insulting to someone. Lord Augustus, or Tuppy, is the butt of many jokes. Before long, we get this exchange:
Dumby. I don’t think we are bad. I think we are all good, except Tuppy.
Lord Darlington. No, we are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
Dumby. We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars? Upon my word, you are very romantic to-night, Darlington.
Cecil Graham. Too romantic! You must be in love. Who is the girl?
Lord Darlington. The woman I love is not free, or thinks she isn’t. [Glances instinctively at Lord Windermere while he speaks.]
A few minutes later, we hear another famous Oscarism.
Lord Darlington. What cynics you fellows are!
Cecil Graham. What is a cynic? [Sitting on the back of the sofa.]
Lord Darlington. A man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.
Cecil Graham. And a sentimentalist, my dear Darlington, is a man who sees an absurd value in everything, and doesn’t know the market price of any single thing.
Pictures today are from The Library of Congress.






















































































































































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