Lewis Grizzard
In the time between 1980 and 1994, if you lived in Atlanta you heard about Lewis Grizzard. Some people loved him. Some did not. He told good old boy stories about growing up in rural Georgia. Many of them were enjoyable. He also made social and political commentaries, which upset a few people.
PG had mixed feelings about Lewis. The stories about Kathy Sue Loudermilk and Catfish were funny. His opinions about gays, feminists, and anything non redneck could get on your nerves. His column for the fishwrapper upset PG at least twice a week.
In 1982, Lewis (he reached the level of celebrity where he was known by his first name only) wrote a column about John Lennon. Lewis did not understand why Mr. Ono was such a big deal. PG cut the column out of the fishwrapper, and put it in a box. Every few years, PG would be looking for something, find that column, and get mad all over again.
The New Georgia Encyclopedia has a page about Lewis, which expresses some of these contradictions. If Grizzard’s humor revealed the ambivalence amid affluence of the Sunbelt South, it reflected its conservative and increasingly angry politics as well. He was fond of reminding fault-finding Yankee immigrants that “Delta is ready when you are,” and, tired of assaults on the Confederate flag, he suggested sarcastically that white southerners should destroy every relic and reminder of the Civil War (1861-65), swear off molasses and grits, drop all references to the South, and begin instead to refer to their region as the “Lower East.” Grizzard also wore his homophobia and hatred for feminists on his sleeve, and one of the last of his books summed up his reaction to contemporary trends in its title, Haven’t Understood Anything since 1962 and Other Nekkid Truths (1992).
In the end, which came in 1994, when he was only forty-seven, the lonely, insecure, oft-divorced, hard-drinking Grizzard proved to be the archetypal comic who could make everyone laugh but himself. He chronicled this decline and his various heart surgeries in I Took a Lickin’ and Kept on Tickin’, and Now I Believe in Miracles (1993), published just before his final, fatal heart failure.
As you may have discerned, Lewis McDonald Grizzard Jr. met his maker on March 20, 1994. He was 47. There was a valve in his heart that wasn’t right. The good news is that he stayed out of the army. At the time, Vietnam was the destination for most enlistees. The bad news is that his heart problems got worse and worse, until it finally killed him.
Sixteen years later, PG found a website, Wired for Books. It is a collection of author interviews by Don Swaim, who ran many of them on a CBS radio show called Book Beat. There are two interviews with Lewis Grizzard. The first one was done to promote My Daddy Was a Pistol and I’m a Son of A Gun. This was the story of Lewis Grizzard Senior, who was another mixed bag.
PG found himself listening to this chat, and wondered what he had been missing all those years. The stories and one liners came flowing out like the Chattahoochee going under the perimeter highway. Daddy Grizzard was a soldier, who went to war in Europe and Korea. The second one did something to his mind, and he took to drinking. He was never quite right the rest of his life. His son from adored him anyway. When you put yourself in those loafers for a while, you began to taste the ingredients in that stew we called Lewis Grizzard.
PG still remembers the anger that those columns caused … he has his own story, and knows when his toes are stepped on. The thing is, after listening to this show, PG has an idea of why Lewis Grizzard wrote the things that he did. Maybe PG and Lewis aren’t all that different after all.
The pictures for this feature are from The Library of Congress. While picking out the pictures, PG listened to the other Lewis Grizzard show with Don Swaim. They both have last names that are often mispronounced. When Lewis wondered where Klansmen get those pointy hats… at the KKK mart, perhaps… PG had to stop the broadcast and write a postscript. This is a repost.
Jury Duty
April 15 is the day income tax returns are due. Many self anointed conservatives make noise on this day. 364 days a year they loudly celebrate American exceptionalism. When it is time to pay for it… One popular blogger had a story along those lines today. The chamblee54 comment: In paragraph one you say “full paragraphs necessitate the formation of full thoughts, which only come to those who write because they actually have something to say.” Paragraph five was “Fine. Maybe not.”
PG spent this April 15 with another tacky, but necessary, civic obligation: jury duty. During the educational video, SCOTUS parasite Samuel Alito said, in effect, that if you were on trial you would want someone, like yourself, on the jury. PG has a functioning BS detector. The average lawyer would not want PG in the same zip code as the jury room, if his client were on trial.
The day started at 5am. PG made breakfast, took the week’s trash to the street, and published a blog post about drones. This is the sort of expensive, big government activity that the conservatives don’t seem to mind. Drones kill children, and right to lifers say nothing.
The plan was to take marta to Dickhater. PG gets tired of driving all the time. When the time came to go to the station, PG slipped off the driveway, and tore up a slice of earth. He stopped to cover the skid mark with mulch. He got to the marta station in time to see the train leaving for downtown. The plan then became a drive to Dickhater. The parking deck was reached at 7:53am. The summons said to arrive at 8:15 am. Spell check suggestion for Dickhater: eradicate.
The entertainment did not begin until 8:37 am. PG probably could have caught the next train. There was little to do except watch the video, read a book, and wait. At 9:20 am, the MC asked a list of people if they had Safeway insurance. At 9:25 am, they were led to the courtroom, and the rest of the jurors were given a break until 10 am. At 10:21 am, the rest of the jury room was sent home.
Pictures today are from The Library of Congress. This is a wonderful facility, offering downloads of thousands of public domain photographs. The LOC is a function of big government, and is supported with tax revenues. It’s annual budget would pay for a three drone strikes. The last statement was a made up statistic, and should not be used in any serious discussion. This collection of working women was taken in Philadelphia, PA. The photographer was Jack Delano, and the time was June 1943.
Drones
A giant art installation in Pakistan got some attention. An international committee displayed a large picture of a child, in an area that receives many drone strikes. The idea is to make drone controllers more aware of the human life on the ground.
A few days later, a commentary appeared, This Giant Art Piece in Pakistan Won’t Be Making Drone Pilots Feel Empathy. The author said the *target audience* of the piece was the empathetic public, not the drone controllers. There is a link to an article, where the psychological impact of drone warfare, on the controllers, is discussed. People in Yemen have a different perspective.
The drone war has been going on for some time now. It began under George W. Bush, and was intensified under Barack H. Obama. The “right to life” moving lips have been strangely silent. There are indications that fewer children are being killed now than before. Since the drone war is conducted by the secrecy oriented C.I.A., there is little way to *confirm or deny* these reports. Nor is it possible to determine the financial cost of this program. Pictures today are from The Library of Congress.
Testing Whiteness And Privilege
In certain circles, the phrase “white privilege” gets a lot of lip service. The eyeball snatchers at buzzfeed are paying attention. They recently published two quiz features, How Stereotypically White Are You? and How Privileged Are You? PG decided to see how he fits in.
Buzzfeed questionnaires are usually problematic. The “how white” form is a bit different. There is only one question, “Have you ever… (check all that apply).” There is a list of 100 things you might have done. You check all the ones that apply. Number 91-100 are: 91 Attended a film festival? 92 Wanted to live in Portland? 93 Embroidered? 94 Gone camping in a snuggie? 95 Been to Burning Man? 96 Been on a horse in the ocean? 97 Bought the clear Band-Aids because all the other ones were too dark for your skin? 98 Taken a group holiday photo shoot with your friends? 99 Used the hashtag #WhitePeopleProblems because you are white and had a problem? 100 Been personally offended by a post about white people?
PG is not a normal person. Yes, there are few things that are more common than a unique person. Still, this list gave PG problems. He still had not checked any possibilities when he reached numbers 20 and 21. 20 Gotten up to go dance because “The Macarena” came on? 21 Done the same for “The Electric Slide”? PG has run away from the dance floor when “The Macarena” came on. Of course, there was that night at the 57th when “The Electric Slide” came on, PG tried to join in, and made a total fool of himself by not knowing the steps.
There were five other possibilities that PG checked. 25 Recommended an NPR podcast? 32 Laughed out loud to Monty Python? 65 A toga party? 89 Watched Fox News? 100 Been personally offended by a post about white people? One night, PG made a beer run. He walked into a liquor store wearing a toga. This should get extra points.
“You checked off 6 out of 100 possible white people scenarios. Congratulations, you are NOT white! You’re the first of your friends to perfect a new dance move and never have to worry about what level of SPF you should use. Heck, you might not even know what SPF stands for and that’s OK because the sun is your friend and that’s cool as shit.” The result was illustrated by a picture of Colin Powell.
The privilege quiz has a similar format. “Check off all the statements that apply to you.” The statements are not numbered this time. To facilitate this post, PG copied the list of statements. This perhaps should be a privilege sensitive option, but is not.
This list is a familiar litany of statements about race, sexuality, body types, income, and religion. If you are on the good side of these things, you are presumed to have privilege. Being a white cis male is an indication of privilege.
“You live with 30 out of 100 points of privilege. You’re not privileged at all. You grew up with an intersectional, complicated identity, and life never let you forget it. You’ve had your fair share of struggles, and you’ve worked hard to overcome them. We do not live in an ideal world and you had to learn that the hard way. It is not your responsibility to educate those with more advantages than you, but if you decide you want to, go ahead and send them this quiz. Hopefully it will help.” It is not certain how this quiz will help people with too much privilege. Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
Gasoline Tactics
This information was originally posted six years ago. PG received a chain letter email about gasoline prices, with these suggestions. With demand increasing, and supply decreasing, the price of petroleum is going to go up. Pictures today are from The Library of Congress.
Only buy or fill up your car or truck in the early morning when the ground temperature is still cold. Remember that all service stations have their storage tanks buried below ground. The colder the ground the more dense the gasoline. When it gets warmer gasoline expands. When you pump in the afternoon or in the evening… your gallon is not exactly a gallon. In the petroleum business, the specific gravity and the temperature of the gasoline plays an important role.
When you’re filling up do not squeeze the trigger of the nozzle to a fast mode. If you look you will see that the trigger has three (3) stages: low, middle, and high. You should be pumping on low speed, thereby minimizing the vapors that are created while you are pumping. All hoses at the pump have a vapor return. If you are pumping on the fast rate, some liquid that goes to your tank becomes vapor. Those vapors are being sucked up and back into the underground storage tank so you’re getting less fuel for your money.
Fill up when your gas tank is HALF FULL or HALF EMPTY. The more gas you have in your tank the less air is occupying the empty space. Gasoline evaporates faster than you might imagine. Gasoline storage tanks have an internal floating roof. This roof serves as zero clearance between the gas and the atmosphere, so it minimizes the evaporation.
If there is a gasoline truck pumping into the storage tanks when you stop , DO NOT fill up–most likely the gasoline is being stirred up as the gas is being delivered. You might pick up some of the dirt that normally settles on the bottom.
Cary Grant Took LSD
There is a nifty article about Cary Grant and LSD on the web now. It seems Mr. Grant, the onetime Archibald Leach, had a few issues. Duh. Married five times. Widely rumored to the the bf of Randolph Scott. A talented actor, but a mess in the real world.
In 1956, Mr. Grant was with third wife Betsy Drake, who had a tough summer. “It was an open secret between cast and crew alike that the married Cary Grant was sleeping with Sophia Loren during their filming of The Pride and The Passion. Drake had flown to Italy to be by her husband’s side during the shoot only to find Grant ignoring her. Distraught, she fled on what was to be a quiet voyage on the SS Andrea Doria. On July 25, 1956 her quiescent journey turned into a nightmare. The ship collided with a Swedish ocean liner off the coast of Nantucket, Massachusetts, sinking to the bottom of the Sea and claiming fifty-one lives.2 Betsy survived but was traumatized. The incident, coupled with the estrangement of her husband, haunted her in her sleep.”
Betsy Drake had a friend named Sally Brophy, an actress. Miss Brophy also received help from a psychiatrist, which included taking LSD. Eventually, Cary Grant started to go see this doctor.
Taking a legal trip, in a Hollywood doctor’s office, is not like going to a rave. It was seen as therapy, a way of learning how to deal with your problems. According to Cary Grant, it worked very well. He talked about it to a reporter, and then confirmed that he wanted this to go out to the public.
“The shock of each revelation brings with it an anguish of sadness for what was not known before in the wasted years of ignorance and, at the same time, an ecstasy of joy at being freed from the shackles of such ignorance … I learned many things in the quiet of that room … I learned that everything is or becomes its own opposite … it releases inhibition. You know, we are all unconsciously holding our anus. In one LSD dream I shit all over the rug and shit all over the floor. Another time I imagined myself as a giant penis launching off from earth like a spaceship … I seemed to be in a world of healthy, chubby little babies’ legs and diapers, smeared blood, a sort of general menstrual activity taking place … As a philosopher once said, you cannot judge the day until the night ..”
The only problem was, Mr. Grant had a movie coming out, “Operation Petticoat”. The studio “tripped out” when it heard the star of the show was praising LSD in the press. Mr. Grant had a share in the profits of the film, and was persuaded to call the reporter and recant on the interview.
Not everyone was impressed by the doctors that Mr. Grant used. “Aldous Huxley had encountered the clinic prior to his death, but had sought his LSD experiences from the parallel practice of Dr. Oscar Janiger, the other acid doctor to the stars. Huxley witnessed Chandler and Hartman’s work and was unnerved by their approach. “We met two Beverly Hills psychiatrists the other day,” he wrote, “who specialise in LSD therapy at $100 a shot – and, really, I have seldom met people of lower sensitivity, more vulgar mind! To think of people made vulnerable by LSD being exposed to such people is profoundly disturbing.”
In any event, LSD became criminalized, Doctors Chandler and Hartman got in trouble, and Cary Grant got married two more times. While Grant never renounced LSD, he refused to use any other illegal drug, even marijuana. He was a conservative old fogey.
Maureen Donaldson was the lover of Cary Grant in the seventies, and was a friend of Alice Cooper. She finally persuaded Mr. Grant to go to an Alice Cooper concert with her. He wore sunglasses, gold chains, and dressed like a “seedy agent”. He sat through the entire show, wearing earplugs, hating every minute of it.
As Miss Donaldson recalled the evening “Driving back to Los Angeles, I congratulated Cary for being such a good sport … He’d made an extraordinary effort to please me … [I asked him] ‘You really hated it, didn’t you?’ ‘It’s…’ he said, struggling for words, ‘you know what it’s like? Remember I told you about the time I took LSD in my doctor’s office and shat all over his rug and floor?’ ‘Yes,’ I said. ‘Well now I know how that poor doctor felt.”
Pictures are from The Library of Congress. This is a repost.
Eye Of A Needle
There is a quote attributed to Jesus that many have heard. The key words are rich man and camel. It is interpreted in many ways. One way to begin this discussion is to look at the King James Bible. Pictures today are from The Library of Congress. This is a repost.
16 And, behold, one came and said unto him,
Good Master, what good thing shall I do, that I may have eternal life?
17 And he said unto him, Why callest thou me good?
[there is] none good but one, [that is], G-d: but if thou wilt enter into life, keep the commandments.
18 He saith unto him, Which? Jesus said, Thou shalt do no murder,
Thou shalt not commit adultery, Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not bear false witness,
19 Honor thy father and [thy] mother: and, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.
20 The young man saith unto him, All these things have I kept from my youth up: what lack I yet?
21 Jesus said unto him, If thou wilt be perfect, go [and] sell that thou hast,
and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come [and] follow me.
22 But when the young man heard that saying, he went away sorrowful: for he had great possessions.
23 Then said Jesus unto his disciples, Verily I say unto you,
That a rich man shall hardly enter into the kingdom of heaven.
24 And again I say unto you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle,
than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.
As with all quotes from the bible, a bit of thought is helpful. Was this said only one time, or was this a standard part of his teaching? Was the meaning changed in the transition from Aramaic to Greek to English? Had Jesus been taste testing the water and wine?
With the current vogue for “prosperity gospel”, many Jesusmongers have some splainin’ to do. Once, PG heard the redo blue preacher talking about this quote. His version was that there were caves in the desert where travelers would take a break on their journey. They would go in the cave, use the restroom, eat lunch, and then go on with their journey. The entrance to these caves was sometimes rather small, and it was tough to fit a camel inside.
Another version is about the local geography of Jerusalem. There was a gate in Jerusalem called the eye of the needle. It was a tight fit, and camels had a tough time getting through. Had Jesus been to Jerusalem at this point in his ministry?
According to Biblos.com, the Koran tells the same story. “The impious, who in his arrogance shall accuse our doctrine of falsity, shall find the gates of heaven shut: nor shall he enter there till a camel shall pass through the eye of a needle. It is thus that we shall recompense the wicked.” Al Koran. Surat vii. ver. 37.” (The home page of Biblos has an ad… “What investment is up 18% a year for the last 11 years? Click to see now”)
Whether this quote is fact or fiction, literal or symbolic, it can make for some funny stories. Once PG walked through a living room, while a religious tv show was on. The telepastor was in his church’s private studio, which was not cheap to build and equip. The man was wearing a beautiful preaching costume, which no doubt cost a pretty penny. By the standards of the world, the dude was filthy rich. During the few seconds that PG paid attention, the man on the tv said something about a camel.
Those who go For The Win should take heed of the last verse of Matthew 19.
“But many [that are] first shall be last; and the last [shall be] first.”
Twenty Questions
Someone in twitterland posted a link, 20 Questions to Ask New Employees. Since I might be in the job market again soon, maybe it would be easier to prepare the answers in advance. Here goes. Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
01. Do you have any tattoos you regret? What/where is it? No. Having a tattoo installed has always seemed too painful to contemplate. There are tattoos that I regret seeing on other people, but that memory is safely repressed.
02. If you had to marry one serial killer from history, who would it be? (You won’t be a victim.) Another feature of twitter these days is FaithVoters4Hillary. It is obvious that any husband of hers can do whatever, and whomever, he/she pleases. As Secretary of State, Hillary has supervised the demise of countless children in Pakistan. She makes Charles Manson look like a sunday school teacher.
03. What would you do if I put a live octopus on your desk? Take it to a restaurant on Buford Hiway. There are only so many stray dogs.
04. Biggie or Tupac? I don’t use cologne. Why should I have to choose between those two brands?
05. Are you the kind of person who chit-chats in the public restroom during a tandem pee session? Only during a full moon.
06. Have you ever stolen a pen that writes exceptionally well from a restaurant? I thought it was half a set of chopsticks.
07. Do you (know) anyone who’s killed someone? If so, was it at your behest? If so, how concerned should I be about staying on your good side? This is a trick question.
08. Have you ever owned a water pick? Why? I was trying to clean the grout in the shower. That was the only thing that came close to working, and not very well.
09. What are your thoughts on cubicle farting? If I was in a cubicle that farted, I would move. This might be an issue for OSHA.
10. If you were ever in a situation where you knew you were definitely going to be cut in half, would you rather be cut length-wise or width-wise? (You’re going to die either way; this is a preference question, not a survival question.) More information is needed. Is it a laser, or a band saw? It would be a different answer for each one.
11. Do you eat fragrant foods at your desk, and if so, how important is it to you? This question makes fun of certain religions. It is not an acceptable question.
12. On a scale of 1, not at all, to 10, you’re a filthy scumbag, how much will you judge me for wearing the same dress pants two (or more) days in a row? Dress pants is an expression that does not make sense. You can wear a dress. You can wear pants. Technically you could wear pants under a dress, but why would you want to?
13. Do you have any spouses or children I should know about right now? If no, please don’t bring them up in subsequent conversation and expect me to know who you’re talking about. Only if Bill gives Hillary the divorce she needs.
14. Do you plan on getting any unconventional haircuts during your tenure here? How convincing do you expect me to be when I tell you it looks great? The opposite of con is pro. Do I get unproventional haircuts? These are installed under anesthesia. Will insurance pay for this?
15. Of all the people you’ve met so far, who would you feel the least conflicted about trampling in the event of an emergency evacuation? The cashier at WalMart who told me that pennies were not welcome as payment.
16. Do you know exactly how many moles you have on your body? If yes, is the reason dermatological or just creepy? Mole is a sauce. If I were to apply a condiment to my body, it would be mustard.
17. Are you actually qualified to do the job you were hired for? It would be silly to fill this part out before I know what job I am applying for? If the job is a full time liar, then of course I am qualified.
18. Do you participate in any uncommon hobbies? If yes, please allow me some time to prepare my reaction for that Friday when you suddenly mention you’re going to an Anime convention. I copy lists of joke questions off the internet and post answers on my blog.
19. Do you intend on stabbing me in the back/making me look bad sometime in the near future? If yes, please understand my efforts to get everyone in the office to hate you will begin immediately. If you are going to hire me, you already look bad enough.
20. For how long do you reasonably expect me to smile every time I see you around the office like you’re a tourist that doesn’t speak English? As long as necessary.
Mrs. Fenton
There is a bit of urban legend mongering on the innertubes these days. It shows a letter. It is from the manager of a Kmart in Reno, NV. It tells “Mrs. Fenton” not to go shopping there anymore. It seems as though her husband has been misbehaving.
Here is the text of the letter. Mr. Fenton: August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M’s on lay-buy. October 4: Looked straight in to the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose. December 23: Went in the fitting room, shut the door and waited a while; then yelled, very loudly, “There is no toilet paper in here!”
The wet blankets at snopes say the letter is a fake. This page is sponsored by an ad for a book, Journey to the Cross: Reflecting on 24 Hours That Changed the World. You can’t make this stuff up.
Mrs. Fenton lived at 35 Rasmussen Street, Moores Park, Reno, NV, 89503. Google maps has never heard of this address. Kmart Store 4855 was located at Summit Ridge, Reno, NV, 89503. This is a side street, with no current signs of Kmarttage.
The letter is good for a laugh. The problems might come when some person is inspired to try one of the pranks. After all, an earlier title of the piece was “Things to do at Wal-Mart while your family is taking forever to finish shopping.” The person who has to clean up after “Make a trail of orange juice on the floor to the restrooms” will not be amused. Maybe you should tell this person to lighten up, and get a sense of humor. Do not try this in a stand your ground state.
A similar lack of respect for humanity is seen in fake crime videos. In the one linked to, two men try breaking into a car. One is treated more rudely by the police. This video inspired much hand wringing about unfair treatment of minorities.
With all the real crimes being perpetrated, why are these pinheads staging a fake crime? They are making a video, to illustrate their social commentary. Police should be fighting real crime, not playing the bad guy in a youtube adventure. This makes about as much sense as “While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.”
Pictures today are from The Library of Congress.
Your Life On Text
An all caps graphic washes up on the digital shores from time to time. The author, and copyright status, are not known. It was not written here. Reading it can be a chore, even though it looks cool. It is also selfish… the only opinion that matters is the individual reading it. It doesn’t have a good beat, but you can dance to it. Pictures are from The Library of Congress. This is a repost.
This is your life.
Do what you love, and do it often.
If you don’t like something, change it.
If you don’t like your job, quit.
If you don’t have enough time, stop watching TV.
If you are looking for the love of your life, stop:
They will be waiting for you when you start doing things you love.
Stop over analyzing, life is simple
All emotions are beautiful.
When you eat, appreciate every last bite.
Open your mind, arms, and heart to new things and people,
We are united in our differences.
Ask the next person you see what their passion is,
And share your inspiring dream with them.
Travel often, getting lost will help you find yourself.
Some opportunities only come once, seize them.
Life is about the people you meet, and the things you create with them
So go out and start creating.
Life is short. Live your dream, and wear your passion.
“Do you have to be a poet? If you don’t have to be a poet, be a prose writer. You’ll get further faster. Poetry — there’s probably more poetry published today than any time in the history of the world. Nevertheless, there is this — people think they have this blindness when they see a line in the typography of poetry, and it just blocks them. So if you can say the same thing in prose, you’ll probably be better off” Lawrence Ferlinghetti
Florence Foster Jenkins
Useless Information had a show, The Patron Saint of the Vocally Challenged. It tells the story of Florence Foster Jenkins. She had a wealthy father, and hired vocal coaches to try and produce a good singer. She became somewhat of a concert attraction, and sold out Carnegie Hall. Accompianist Cosme McMoon did what he could to help. Mrs Jenkins was, by all accounts, very, very bad.
Here is more information about the talent. “Florence Foster Jenkins (1868–26 November 1944) was an American soprano who became famous for her complete lack of singing ability. From her recordings, it is apparent that Jenkins had little sense of pitch and rhythm and was barely capable of sustaining a note. Her accompanist can be heard making adjustments to compensate for her tempo variations and rhythmic mistakes. Nonetheless, she became tremendously popular in her unconventional way. Her audiences apparently loved her for the amusement she provided rather than her musical ability. Critics often described her work in a backhanded way that may have served to pique public curiosity. Despite her patent lack of ability, Jenkins was firmly convinced of her greatness. She compared herself favourably to the renowned sopranos Frieda Hempel and Luisa Tetrazzini, and dismissed the laughter which often came from the audience during her performances as coming from her rivals consumed by “professional jealousy.””
A cd of her product, The Glory (????) of the Human Voice, is available. Amazonians were not kind. “This is a recording that every serious musician should own, for a variety of (ahem) reasons. But by all means, buy the cheap one. If the sound is better on the remastered version, it could only be more painful.” “she gets points for effort” ” I appreciate camp as much as anyone, but my wife was ready to divorce me if I played another song from the album” “The whole matter stinks of making fun of a person afflicted by illness. What a cruel species we were – and still are.”
The legend is that she said “People may say I can’t sing, but no one can ever say I didn’t sing.” A quick google search does not reveal the source, or context, so this quote cannot be verified. Quote Factory has this available in eleven tasteful designs.
The Carnegie Hall show took place a month before her death. Here is the story.
“In order for a singer to succeed, they need to have a combination of talent, charisma, and interpretive quality. And, by definition, they need to be able to sing. Florence Foster Jenkins had none of these attributes. In fact, she was considered one of the worst singers of all time. She was independently wealthy and performed at the Waldorf and other places around town. It became a thing to do. You had to go and listen to Florence Foster screw up every song she attempted to sing.
She was having a great time and the audience was having a great time, so they kept telling her, “You need to make your Carnegie Hall debut.” So on October 25, 1944, she did, and it was sold out in just two hours. They came from everywhere. She walked onstage in these ridiculous costumes that she’d made herself. She’d throw roses out into the audience, her assistants would go out and collect them, and she’d throw them out into the audience again. The audience would not let her go home. They cheered her and clapped, and one month and one day later she died at the age of 76.”
The program for this performance had a note from the Fire Commissioner, Patrick Walsh.
“FIRE NOTICE – Look around now and choose the nearest exit to your seat. In case of fire walk (not run) to that Exit. Do not try to beat your neighbor to the street.”
The last.fm page with the information on F. F. Jenkins lists “similar artists”. The only two we will have videos from are Wing and Mrs. Miller. Slim Whitman and Tiny Tim, being males, were not considered.
This is a repost. Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
#WhiteManMarchProtestSigns
Did your conversation with “Steve” really happen? It seems a bit off. We have to take your word for this. There is no way to prove it really happened. After your post about the Marilyn Monroe quote, I have to wonder about your integrity. ~ What about the people, who do not agree with your religion, who are attacked by preachers? ~ I was attacked for seven years, by a co worker, after I asked him to turn down his radio. Before this, I had made my peace with Jesus. I didn’t agree with most of what was said about him ~ I see Jesus through the people that believe in him. My experience has been horrific. Since I don’t agree with the scheme for life after death, I see no reason to make excuses for Jesus. ~ I have read that carburetor is french for do not touch ~ @lexiconvalley blog post about accents, based on a lexicon valley episode ~ don’t play leapfrog with a unicorn ~ bad lip sync videos are funny ~ This must be chatter about religion day. I suppose it is better than a hokey buzzfeed video about crime and race. ~ If the text is boring you can always look at the pictures. ~ It might be a trap. ~ Maybe a better question would be, Why do you think? ~ when poc use the n word, pwoc haters don’t have to ~ poc trash themselves by using n word ~ @chescaleigh when poc use #nword, , pwoc h8rs don’t have to, the poc are doing it for them ~ Aren’t most reviews written from complimentary copies? ~ I read an interview once with Christopher Isherwood. There is no online source. The concept is that you are drawn to a religion by the people you meet in that religion. The beliefs are more or less irrelevant. Religion is about people, not beliefs. A corollary notion is that if someone can attract you to a religion, then they can also drive you away from it. This is a big deal in jesus worship, with it’s intense interest in recruiting new followers. As to the matter of where you fit in if you have decided, after repeated exposure and painful contemplation, that you don’t agree with these beliefs …. I don’t have all the answers. ~ would you like a pepsi? ~ In the few days I have been reading your blog, you have had material posted every day. This gives me a reason to come here. If you keep the quantity up, the quality will take care of itself. ~ Is it ethical to modify an adjective for the purpose of creating a noun? ~ Just as you should never go grocery shopping hungry, you should never shop for clothes naked ~ It might save time in fitting rooms. ~ I would say more, and perhaps will later. Now, I have to get on the road to my job. The problem of what I call “positive facism” is not exclusive to Hollywood. Many people like to glorify the positive, and deny that anything non wonderful exists. Jesus worshipers are some of the worst. The trouble is, when the going gets dull, many people think it is a sign of weakness. If their role model does this without boredom, it must be something wrong with me. This is a problem. ~ The good news is that the “church” is located in Harlem. I think the “found in Atlanta” business is a mistake. We have enough weirdos already. ~ All we know about Jesus is what the bible tells us. It really isn’t very much. We choose which parts to focus on. What you think about Jesus says more about you than it does Jesus. ~ ” dude who is the most popular person everywhere he goes” One exception might be the place where they screamed “crucify him”. ~ You should be careful when you say americans should quit consuming stupid cultural material. They might quit reading your blog. ~ Actually, they are Irish. It should read the O’Nomatopoeia empire. ~ It was a pleasant way to spend a couple of hours. The formerly homeless man had some good stories. Unfortunately, only so much can make it into one conversation. The next time an *official blogger* comes to a coffe shop with free parking, I will think about stopping by. ~ What goes around comes around. A lot of preachers say hurtful things. People like to get even with the hired entertainement.~ Holy straw man. Did you write the “Rachel” letter, so that you could reply to it? ~ changing the c, at the end of his name, to o … was a stroke of genius ~ 1-The bearded man currently lives in Americus GA. This is in south Georgia. It is just down the road from Plains. He calls Jimmy Carter “Cousin Jimmy.”2- I have written at great length about the concept of prayer. While it may have some value to others, it is a casualty of my horrific experience with Jesus. I just don’t know what to make of it. 3- It is said that prayer is talking to G-d, while meditation is listening. It has been my experience that many Jesus worshipers talk too much. 4- It would be a wonderful thing if people were as proud of their ability to listen as they were of the clever things that they say. ~ Nothing about midtown is bottomless. ~ What is Socoilogy? ~ 1-What is this about? It is frustrating to come in after an altercation, and hear people talk about it, and not know what it was about. 2-Was this regarding the comments about SMS? I don’t know the specifics of the situation. However, there is a cycle of elation at finding a tribe to belong to, and then disillusionment when you learn that the players are human. 3- I agree with the need to maintain a safe space here. On the other hand, the concept of removing someone from the group should be done very, very carefully. I have said things that bothered people, and been shunned as a result. I suspect that I was misunderstood. Since almost nothing was said directly to me, I have no way of knowing. ~ Is the adjective necessary? When a parent mocks a person, they may be mocking their own child. ~ thank you for not embedding the text on the picture ~ This is a nice image. Whoever (Whosoever) created this took the time to make his text come out as a solid rectangle. Happy Pie Day ~ ” All the treasure in the world can’t buy peace in your mind and soul” It can buy dandy image manipulation software, but won’t give you the taste to use it properly. ~ WDSTF is almost thirty years old. An update is needed by a person gifted in musical communication ~ do you use the buzz, or the radio? ~ white trashcan ~ You do not paste inspiring quotes over your photographs. Thank you. ~ Maybe we could keep the initials GSV, and have a different acronym for every event. Gorgon Serpent Vitals Great Southern Voters Gross Spam Version Geraldo Samuel Voytek ~ Is that where the expression “gay card” came from? ~ “Ever notice how ‘What the hell’ is always the right answer?” ― Marilyn Monroe The word on this quote The Actress, a character based on Marilyn, in the movie Insignificance. Her exact words were: “Have you ever noticed how ‘What the hell’ is always the right decision to make?” ~ #WhiteManMarchProtestSigns grow up #WhiteManMarchProtestSigns you don’t have to shout ~ You can take it to the next gathering. Someone might need a way to fly home. ~ Diaspora Organic Group DOG ~ Maybe the person meant to ask what country his family is from. Why is that bigoted? ~ Fred Phelps is an attention whore. Let’s ignore his funeral.~ I is the shortest, skinniest, word in the language. Those qualities apply to palindromic usage. The lower case has an ornamental tittle. Sarah Palin, the dromic politician, likes to talk about I. ~ Campbell’s chicken noodle soup was originally called Noodle soup with chicken. It did not sell well, and was going to be discontinued. One day, an actor screwed up while reading a radio script, and called it chicken noodle soup. The new name caught on. ~ I thought it was Seattle. ~ Many of the political mail outs in Georgia are produced by a company called Rosetta Stone. ~ When the world turns to prayer, the people go mad ~ POC is a bad term, lumping in groups of people with different stories into one collection ~ A note to saturday: Enjoy this beautiful Angel ~ curley, larry, moe ~ it is amazing how many good lines there are in that film ~ John passes, and one remembers John’s money ~ I cleaned the lint filter in the dryer ~ Is there a recording of YOL singing that quote? ~ sweet spring is your time is my time is our time – for springtime is lovetime and viva sweet love. – e.e. cummings ~ a man is drowning 25 yards off shore. the democrat throws 50 yards of rope and doesn’t tie it to anything the republican throws 10 yards of rope, and says that swimming fifteen yards will build character ~ You your facts your logic ~ Maybe the language needs another word for people you enjoy spending time with. Maybe they are fun to be around, but are they really your friend? (no all caps, only one question mark) ~ Anyone with internet access can start a blog. If he wants this item written about, then he can do it himself. If he wants four million hits a month for his output, then he needs to get busy. ~ hbd #Elton, #Aretha, #Flannery O’Connor ~ Some give Mr. Hirshfeld the credit, or blame, for coining the term racism. ~ there are no air ducks anywhere ducks live in water ~ is that why so many bellies are round? ~ Someone needs to stay at work while parents take care of sick kids ~ Pictures are from The Library of Congress. ~ Selah
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