Smashing Bae’s Junk To Smithereens
@JonathanLKrohn “This is quite possibly the worst thing I’ve ever read. The person who wrote this should be barred from ever writing again. If you could burn emails, I would recommend burning this one with a blow-torch, and scattering the ashes deep in the heart of the Atlantic Ocean.” This got PG’s attention on a boring Saturday. It actually was value added comment to a re-tweet.
“The PR email for Meghan Trainor’s new album is absolutely insane” was the seminal offering. @WizzKhaleesi had a screen shot of the special text. “”hot newlywed sex Meghan and Daryl Sa-BAE-ra are having (did you see what we did there?). Which is why you’ll love the banging’ single “All The Ways.” Billboard was wet for “All The Ways,” calling it “another fun, danceable track to fall in love with.” And would Billboard lie to you, girl?
But perhaps the piece de resistance (that’s French for “Wig Snatch”) is “Marry Me,” a romantic acoustic guitar and ukulele-tinged Awww Fest which delivers all the feels (and then more feels). Meghan wrote the song thirty days after meeting Daryl, and it was so good that she walked down the aisle to it. We know, it’s a little bit #Vomworthy, but also, am I chopping onions right now or are those tears rolling down my face?”
PG saw this purple prose, and felt the need to make a statement. The result was a blackout poem. “But Wig Snatch all the feels We know chopping onions.” As a wise man once said, “If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor.”
Who is Meghan Trainor? Why Is This Meghan Trainor Press Release So Horny? has the text of the PR sensation. The first sentence will live forever. “Valentine’s Day is around the corner, and whether you’re planning on smashing bae’s junk to smithereens or making out with a pint of Phish Food, you need some fresh Valentine’s Day bops to get you in the mood for L♡VE.”
Help, This Meghan Trainor Press Release Is Haunting My Nightmares piles on with glee. “This happened with Thinx underwear’s deranged series of press releases, which used phrases like “Hey squirrelfran” and “astronaughty booty” in an effort to sell period underwear.”
Caroline Goldfarb claims to have written the Trainor train wreck. (Don’t let your mouse hover over the background of that page.) @hairoline A lot of people absolutely HATE the press release I wrote for Meghan Trainor and claim it seems like “a horny 12 year old with no writing experience” must have written it. Jokes on them because I’m actually a horny 28 year old with *some* writing experience @hairoline Trivia: The original draft had a line about Meghan buying sex toys with the ginger from Spy Kids but they took it out @hairoline I just had to block someone who said I deserved the electric chair for writing the horny Meghan Trainor press release, but jokes on them, cause I’m the one who got paid to say “smash bae’s junk to smithereens”
Jonathan L. Krohn had fifteen minutes of fame before he was fifteen years old. He is a journalist now, living in “Iraq and ATL, mostly.” Pictures for this post are from The Library of Congress. Jack Delano took the pictures in April, 1941. “Singing “Trying to Make a Hundred, Ninety-Nine and a Half Won’t Do” during the collection at Negro church in Heard County, Georgia”
Unfollow
For now, facebook is a part of my routine. It is a handy way to know about events, and keep up with people. Unfortunately, many of those people are generous with their opinions. Sometimes, if you want to keep your sanity, you need to limit exposure to these opinions.
You have several options. The one I prefer is unfollow. You go into the inner workings, and click “unfollow Whatshisname.” You will no longer see this person’s opinions. This is preferred to unfriend. The person you unfriend will know that you have kicked them out of your life.
Some people like to unfriend, and block, to punish people. You say something they don’t like, and they get even with you by unfriending you. This is pathetic.
The problem with unfriending is the permanence. Long after the original slight has been forgotten, the person will see that you have kicked them out. There are people I once respected, who have decided to throw me to the curb. No matter how nice they are to me, I will always know they unfriended me. Life is tough enough without this distraction.
Several of the people I unfollowed continue to be a worthwhile part of my life. The last three words I saw from one such person was “your racist family.” My peace of mind will not allow me to have such poison in my life. A couple of months later, I was a guest in his apartment. Should I let his prejudice get in the way? Or should I unfollow him, and move on?
This meme is a recent reason to unfollow. It is a cartoon, with the title “MANY WHITE AMERICANS FAIL TO ASSIMILATE.” It is a gratuitous commentary on racial values. In the top right panel, a man is driving a truck. The Confederate battle flag is flying. The radio plays “And this bird you cannot change,” helpfully labeled “TRADITIONAL FOLK MUSIC.”
I am not a big Lynyrd Skynyrd fan, but I enjoy “Free Bird.” Given the elastic definition of the slur, some people probably think “Free Bird” is racist. Rock and roll started out as “race music.” White people learned how to rock, and made numerous improvements. It is essential americana … the not always comfortable blending of black and white. If you want to see another example, check out this song. The spell check suggestion for Lynyrd Skynyrd is Lyndon Skyward.
This cartoon will not affect police brutality, or enable economic equity. What it does is make fun of lower class white americans. It is not worthy of the person who posted this meme. While I do not wish to publicly distance myself from this person, I cannot subject myself to this poison. When you make fun of Lynyrd Skynyrd, you make fun of me.
Pictures today are from The Library of Congress. The Alabama pictures were taken in 1941, by Jack Delano. Washington DC pictures were taken in July 1941, by Jack Delano.
Why Telephone Keypads Are Different From Computer Keypads
It is a question for the ages…why do telephones have 123 on the top row of the keypad, while computers have 789? The best answer is , we don’t know.
Calculator/computer keypads were an improvement on cash registers. These devices had a matrix of buttons, with the 9 row on top. The row at the far right had single digits, and the row next to them had digits ending in one zero. To ring up a sale for $1.95, you had to push 100, 90, and 5. This evolved into the adding machine configuration of three rows of three buttons, with 0 on the bottom row and 789 on the top row.
When we got started, the telephone used a dial. 1 was at the top, and 0 was at the bottom. The early phone systems used letters as part of the phone number. The first three letters of the seven digit code were two letters and five numbers. (This is what PG remembers from childhood. It may have been different before then).
The two letters referred to an exchange, or part of town where the number was located. The two letters referred to a word. An example would be PG’s grandmother. Her number was TR2 2345. The TR stood for Trinity. Many numbers in midtown Atlanta still start with 87.
In the sixties, ma bell started to develop a keypad to use for what were then called push button phones. In a break with the adding machine tradition, the numbers 123 went on the top row. There are a few ideas why this is, but nothing is certain.
In the early days, the phone switching equipment was not as fast as today. Some thought that by switching the numbers to the top of the keypad, people would have to slow down a bit to “dial” the number. This answer does not make sense to those of us who have grown up with these keypads, and who learned to punch in numbers fast, no matter what system is used. (Anyone using a rotary phone, after getting used to touch tone, is shocked at how slow it is.)
Another concept is the phone company wanting to model the new keypad after the dial phones. This would mean putting the 1 at the top, and 0 at the bottom. Also, with the letters assigned to each number, it would make a lot more sense to have 123/abc def ghi on the top row.
It was suggested that the calculator keypad was patented in the 789-on-top format. Western Electric did not want to pay royalties on this important piece of equipment, so it designed another one. There is also the thought that the calculator was on a desk shelf, where the lower numbers should be at the bottom of the keypad. At the same time, the telephone was on the lower part of the desk, and having 123 on top would be easier to use.
This is a repost. This comment was left on facebook, after the first post.
I won’t pretend to know exactly their reasons, but I will say that I can see some logic in doing it this way. In a numerical context (calculator/computer), you’d want zero next to one, which is where it is in the number sequence. However on… a telephone, 0 has a special meaning: call the operator (at least, it used to mean this).
The guys at Bell Labs took this into consideration when they implemented the “touch tone” or DTMF dialing system. Old style pulse dialing was annoying because it would literally send a pulse for each number (two pulses for two, nine pulses for nine, etc). I meant larger numbers took longer. To change this, and also in anticipation of the fact that eventually phones would be connected to computers, they instead put all the numbers on a grid with each row and column assigned a unique frequency. Each key on the pad combined the two frequencies to produce a tone. In order to accommodate ten numbers, you need a grid of at least 4X3, which they actually increased to 4×4 because they wanted some additional tones (A-D) for extra network functionality.
This is a repost. Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
Jesus Gets A New Nickname
There is a video making the rounds now. The title involves Jesus, and a certain racial slur, delicately known as the N word. The video is embedded above. You can feel the magic for yourself.
Here is a story about the song, with the edgy language bleeped. “One pastor is trying to spread the word of God with an edgy rap song. The rapping pastor and his wife claim they have “Christian swag” while tossing around the n-word. … The video of the rapping pastor was recently uploaded to YouTube but it’s not clear when it was filmed. It was taken at a church in Iowa which closed in 2004.” Another helpful interneter has the lyrics.
In case you didn’t know, Pastor Jim Colerick, and Mrs Mary-Sue Colerick, are melanin deficient. They are, as Bette Midler once said about Karen Carpenter, so white they are invisible. It is not considered good manners for Caucasians to use this word, with or without salvation.
There is another angle to this equation. Many Jesus worshipers see not using cusswords as a sign of righteousness. As a result, many Jesus worshipers use the words G-d, and Jesus Christ, as tools of their anger. This violates the third commandment. Now, this use of a sacred name, as profanity, is being extended to using a sacred name as a racial slur. Someone is always ready to manipulate language to serve an agenda.
When you call a book “the word of G-d”, you give certain words too much power. When you designate the lazy way of saying black as a super duper naughty word, you give those six letters way too much power. Now, we see the convergence of these two taboos. Let the party begin.
This is a repost. Pictures of Pastor and Mrs. Colerick are taken from the video. The other images are from The Library of Congress. Jack Delano was the photographer in December 1942.
Tallulah Bankhead And Billie Holiday
Tallulah Bankhead was born January 31, 1902 in Huntsville AL. She had a year-older sister, Eugenia. Their mother died February 23, 1902. Legend has it her last words were “Take care of baby Eugenia. Tallulah can take care of herself.” This is a repost.
The father of the actress was Will Bankhead. He was a prominent politician, who served as Speaker of the House of Representatives in Washington. Mr. Bankhead was on the short list of Vice Presidential candidates for Franklin Roosevelt, but was passed over. The Bankhead national forest and the Bankhead Highway are both named for Will Bankhead.
Tallulah Bankhead was an actress, radio show hostess, and personality. She went to London in the early twenties and became a stage sensation. Returning home, she became a Broadway star with “The Little Foxes.” She made movies, but saved her best public performances for the stage.
Miss Bankhead was known for being sexually active, with both men and women. Hattie McDaniel, who played Mammie in Gone With The Wind, was rumored to be one of her “friends”. Her introduction to Chico Marx went like this “Miss Bankhead.” “Mr. Marx.” “You know, I really want to fuck you.”. “And so you shall, you old-fashioned boy.”
One legend has Miss Bankhead at a dinner party with Dorothy Parker and Montgomery Clift. As might have been expected, the cocktail hour went on most of the evening. At one point, Mister Clift had his head in Miss Parker’s lap. “oh you sweet man, it’s too bad that you’re a cocksucker. He is a cocksucker, isn’t he?” Miss Bankhead replied “I don’t know, he never sucked my cock.”
Her most famous movie role was in “Lifeboat”, directed by Alfred Hitchcock. Her co stars complained that she was not wearing panties under her dress. Mr. Hitchcock posed the question, is this a matter for wardrobe or for hairdressing?
In the fading days of radio, Tallulah was the host of “The Big Show”. She became known for her deep voice, and for saying “Dah-ling”. More than one guest got big laughs by calling her Mister Bankhead. After “The Big Show” ended, Miss Bankhead remained active on stage and television. She died December 12, 1968.
Miss Bankhead was a staunch Democrat, as is fitting for the political family she was raised in. During the McCarthy era, an actress friend of hers was accused of being a communist. Miss Bankhead made a statement of support for the actress on the radio, and then asked her, are you a communist? The actress said that her daddy was a republican, and so she guessed that was what she was. Miss Bankhead was horrified. “A republican! That’s worse than being a goddamn communist.”
One of Miss Bankhead’s more explosive friendships was with Billie Holliday. “The truth of the matter is that the evidence strongly suggests they probably first met in the early 1930’s during Bankhead’s Harlem rent party and nightclub-slumming days, well before Holiday ever became famous. What is known is that by 1948 they were bosom buddies. A year earlier, Holiday entered the Alderson Federal Reformatory for Women to serve her famous “one day and a year” sentence after being found guilty on dope charges. Four months after her release in 1948, Holiday was appearing at New York’s Strand Theater with Count Basie on the first leg of a cross-country tour. At the same time, Tallulah Bankhead was nearby on Broadway starring in her hit play, Private Lives. Bankhead caused quite a commotion every night thundering late down the ailse during Billie’s show to sit in her special seat to stare in amazement at the gifted & stunningly beautiful Lady Day. Because Holiday’s license to perform in nightclubs where liquor was being served had been revoked (and not renewed) she was forced to earn her living in gruelling tours on the road. For months after the Strand performance, Bankhead traveled with her whenever she could. Also on the tour was dancer/comedian James “Stump Daddy” Cross – nicknamed after his wooden leg, who joined the two famous ladies to make a treacherous threesome.”
“…it appears that during the late 1940s she and Holiday were also lovers. Perhaps they had been all along. Holiday later told William Dufty, who ghostwrote her autobiography, that when Tallulah visited backstage at the Strand Theatre, the thrill she took in exhibitionistic sex made her insist on keeping Holiday’s dressing room door open. Holiday later claimed that Tallulah’s brazen show of affection almost cost her her job at the Strand.”
Before long, Miss Holiday got busted again. Apparently, Miss Bankhead made a phone call to FBI director J. Edgar Hoover, asking for leniency. There is a remarkable thank you – you’re welcome correspondence between Miss Bankhead and Mr. Hoover. “As my Negro Mammy used to say ‘When you pray, you pray to God don’t you……I had only met Billie Holiday twice in my life….and feel the most profound compassion for her…she is essentially a child at heart whose troubles have made her psychologically unable to cope with the world in which she finds herself…poor thing, you know I did everything within the law to lighten her burden”. “A giddy and twitterpated Hoover wrote back , “Your comments are greatly appreciated, and I trust that you will no hesitate to call on me at any time you think I might be of assistance to you.”
At some point, the two became less intimate. Miss Bankhead had her own legal headaches, and put some distance between her and Miss Holiday. (Eleanora Fagan was the birth name of the chanteuse. Tallulah Brockman Bankhead was the real name of the thespian.) When “Lady Sings the Blues” was being prepared, Miss Bankhead got an advance copy, and was horrified by what she saw. A fierce note was sent to the book’s publisher, and scenes were edited out. Miss Holiday was outraged. The letter that resulted is a poison pen classic. “My maid who was with me at the Strand isn’t dead either. There are plenty of others around who remember how you carried on so you almost got me fired out of the place. And if you want to get shitty, we can make it a big shitty party. We can all get funky together!”
The first part of this story is a repost. Pictures today are from “The Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library”. “Members of the Atlanta Woman’s Club, during a luncheon for retiring president W.F. Milton, in the AWC banquet hall, in Atlanta, Georgia, March 5, 1937.” Picture of Billie Holiday from The Library of Congress.
Obituary Mambo
Andrew Sullivan had an uplifting feature, the other day, about obituaries. As is his custom, he found an article at another site, threw out a juicy quote, and moved on. It is up to Chamblee54 to provide more detail, and put up pictures for the text averse. These pictures today are from the Pleasant Hill Baptist Church cemetery. This is a repost. Many of the links are dead.
It is a common practice to look at the obituaries (aka “Irish sports page”) first thing in the morning. If the reader is not included, then the day can proceed as normal. This custom does not take into account the possibility that you have died, and your family it too cheap to purchase a notice.
The article in question is Ten things you don’t know about the obit biz It starts off by saying that the family members are usually happy to help the obit scribe. They have stories about the recently deceased, like ” Eddie “Bozo” Miller boasted of regularly drinking a dozen martinis before lunch, yet he lived to age eighty-nine.”
Newspapers take different approaches to obituaries. Some assign rookies, or use the death beat as punishment for troublemakers. Others give the job to their best writer. The paid notices are usually written by family members, with the help of the undertaker.
Of course, there is the occasional oddball. Alana Baranick, obituary writer for Cleveland’s The Plain Dealer and lead author of Life on the Death Beat: A Handbook for Obituary Writers , likes to visit every municipality in the United States named Cleveland.
One oft repeated saying is that obituaries are about life, not death. As the source puts it: “The British “quality” newspapers — The Times, The Daily Telegraph, The Guardian, and The Independent, substantiate the old chestnut about obituaries being about life, not death. These papers rarely mention the cause of death, focusing instead on presenting a vivid account of a lived life. American papers have an unhealthy fixation on death. It’s common for “complications of chronic pulmonary disease” or “bile duct cancer” to show up in the story’s lede, never to resurface.”
Only one obituary has won a Pulitzer prize. ” Leonard Warren, a Metropolitan Opera baritone, dropped dead mid-performance in 1960. Sanche de Gramont (who changed his name to Ted Morgan), a young rewrite man at the New York Herald Tribune, banged out the obit in under an hour and won a 1961 Pulitzer in the Local Reporting, Edition Time, category.”
There is an The International Association of Obituarists The headquarters is in Dallas TX, presumably near a grassy knoll. They have an annual convention, which is said to be a lively affair. The 2005 conference was in Bath, England. The 2007 conference was in Alfred NY. There is also the Society of Professional Obituary Writers.
IAO was founded by Carolyn Gilbert, the lady who puts the bitch in obituary. Ms. Gilbert collaborates on a page, Remembering The Passed. RTP has a series of podcasts. They require an apple app to listen, which is too much work for PG.
Death is a part of life. Every language has a word for it, and English has a number of slang expressions. An incomplete list would include : ““passed on”, “are no more”, “have ceased to be”, “expired and gone to meet their Maker”, “are bereft of life”, “have ceased to be”, “rest in peace”, “push up daisies”, “whose metabolic processes are now history”, “are off the twig”, “have kicked the bucket”, “shuffled off their mortal coil”, “run down the curtain” or “joined the Choir Invisible”
Columbia Journalism Review (Motto: Strong Press, Strong Democracy) has a feature about Obit. “Krishna Andavolu is the managing editor of Obit an online magazine intended for those interested in obituaries, epitaphs, elegies, postludes, retrospectives, grave rubbings, widow’s weeds, and other such memorabilia of expiration. Part eulogistic clearinghouse, part cultural review, Obit purports to examine life through the prism of death. Founded in 2007 by a wealthy New Jersey architect who sensed an exploitable niche after seeing a middle-aged woman distraught over the death of Captain Kangaroo, the site is a locus for enlightened morbidity.”
OM is worth a visit. The top story features a picture of Betty Ford, who survived Breast Cancer, Alcoholism, and The White House, to die at 93. The site has an ad from Newlymaid.com, with the creative suggestion to Trade In Your Old Bridesmaid Dress & Get a New Little Black Dress.
OM has a popular feature called Died on the same day. Grim reaper recruits on January 24 include Caligula (AD 41), Winston Churchill (1965), Bill W., co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous (1971), L. Ron Hubbard (1986), Ted Bundy (1989).
No google search is complete without someone trying to make money. Obituaries Professionally Written says ” … we believe in honoring a life with respect, dignity and integrity. When needed, euphemism is used liberally. “
OPW content provider Larken Bradley says “”Obituary writing is an honor, a privilege, and great fun … I can’t think of anything I’d rather be doing.”… After she dies she expects her obit headline will read, “Obituary Writer, Six Feet Under.”
PG was going to repost an old favorite, Obituary Mambo. When you recycle something this often, it is a good idea to check the links. For OM, many do not work.
The story begins with a story at the digital home of Andrew Sullivan. This fine facility is now in paywall purgatory. When you click on the old link, you see a cartoon of a French borderguard, and the message “THIS CONNECTION IS UNTRUSTED You have asked Firefox to connect securely to andrewsullivan.thedailybeast.com, but we can’t confirm that your connection is secure. …” The browser has this reaction to several of the links in the original story.
Monetization of obituaries seems to have run aground. Links to Obit Magazine give you a page of fine print HTML. The International Association of Obituarists is not on the internet. The NPR interview with Carolyn Gilbert, founder of the IAO, is still up. Presumably, she is still putting the bitch back in obituary. Maybe the 2005 convention in Bath, England was too much.
Another link gave this result: “Welcome to http://www.obituarywriters.com ! Our new web site, powered by EarthLink Web Hosting, is currently under construction.” In its place is The Society of Professional Obituary Writers, “Proudly powered by Weebly.”
SPOW hosted a contest in 2011 and 2012. “Each year, The Society of Professional Obituary Writers holds a competition to honor excellence in obituary writing. Obituaries are submitted by reporters and editors from all over the world, and blind-judged by a panel of our members. Winners receive trophies, known as the Grimmies, and are feted at the annual conference.” Grimmies were given for Best Obit, and Best Body of Work.
Give A Damn
@BernieSanders “I got into politics not to figure out how to become President. I got into politics because I give a damn.” The old tweeter sent this message December 11, 2015, at 4:42 pm Sanders Standard Time. At last glance, it was retweeted 25,901 times, and liked 44,263 times.
What exactly is a damn? When you give one, do you gift wrap it? The dictionary says that damn is a verb, meaning “condemn to a punishment or fate; especially : to condemn to hell.” Giving a verb is not good grammar. Damn is considered a mild profanity, which adds polemic punch.
History gives us a second opinion. “In 1665, Aurangzeb, or Abul Muzaffar Muhi-ud-Din Mohammad Aurangzeb was the emperor of the Mughal empire. He ruled from 1658 until his death in 1707. Aurangzeb had coins minted in precious metals as well as copper. The copper denominations were one Dam and one half Dam.” (“Aurangzeb … eliminate the use of the kalima on the coinage, as he felt the sacred words would be defiled on coins as they were handled by infidels.”)
At some point after the invention of the copper dam, Great Britain conquered the Mughal empire. By this time, the dam was not worth twice as much as a half dam, but not much otherwise. According to some unverified sources, British soldiers would say that something was not worth a dam. Or maybe, they said they would not give a dam. Somehow, the profaning n was added, and a saying for apathy entered the english language.
How much is a dam/damn worth? To people living downhill from the lake, a dam is valuable. As for the numismatic value of an ancient copper coin: “By looking at both catalog values for copper Dams minted in the Mughal calendar year of 1075 (Western date 1665) … we can provide the following very approximate values for copper half-Dams and Dams minted in the name of Aurangzeb: worn: $4, average circulated: $7, well preserved: $30.”
Getting back to BS, he probably used the conventional meaning of GAD, which is that he cares. Or maybe, he meant that he gives a dollar. If current economic trends hold up, the dollar might not be worth a dam. The welfare state proposals of BS, according to the admittedly biased Wall Street Journal, would cost $18 Trillion. This would effectively double the national debt. If we get mixed up in another war, or if a nuclear power plant blows up, another few trillion might go down the tubes.
Only the most deluded Bernoids expect college tuition to be free in 2018. BS is talking a good game, but most people know his pants are on fire. One person who is offended because BS won’t step up the lies is Ta-Nehisi Coates. If reparations are added onto free college tuition, then the value of the dollar might go below a half dam. This is a repost. Pictures for snowstorm Saturday are from “The Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library”.
Groups Of Seven
Seven Samurai -Kambei Shimada, Gorōbei Katayama, Shichirōji, Heihachi Hayashida, Katsushirō Okamoto, Kyūzō,
The Magnificent Seven – Chris Adams, Harry Luck, Vin, Bernardo O’Reilly, Britt, Lee, Chico
Seven Wonders of the Ancient World-Great Pyramid of Giza, Hanging Gardens of Babylon, Statue of Zeus at Olympia, Temple of Artemis at Ephesus, Mausoleum of Maussollos at Halicarnassus, Colossus of Rhodes, Lighthouse of Alexandria
Rome is built on Seven hills – Palatine, Capitoline, Quirinal, Viminal, Esquiline, Caelian, and Aventine. Thank you SevenMagazine.
The Seven Sisters – Barnard College, Bryn Mawr College, Mount Holyoke College, Radcliffe College, Smith College, Vassar College, and Wellesley College
“All human actions have one or more of these seven causes: chance, nature, compulsions, habit, reason, passion and desire.” Aristotle 384 BC-322 BC Thank you Thinkexist.
The Magnificent Seven are seven cemeteries used by the citizens of nineteenth century London: Kensal Green Cemetery, West Norwood Cemetery, Highgate Cemetery, Abney Park Cemetery, Nunhead Cemetery, Brompton Cemetery, Tower Hamlets Cemetery
seven deadly sins – lust, gluttony, greed, sloth, wrath, envy, pride
seven holy virtues – chastity, abstinence, temperance, diligence, patience, kindness
seven goddesses – isis, astarte, hecate, demeter, kali, iana, diana
seven dwarfs – bashful, doc, dopey, grumpy, happy, sleepy, sneezy
seven brides – Alice, Dorcas, Liza, Martha, Millie, Sarah, Ruth
seven brothers – Adam, Benjamin, Caleb, Daniel, Ephraim, Frank, Gideon
seven husbands of Elizabeth Taylor – Nicky Hilton, Micheal Wilding, Micheal Todd, Eddie Fisher, Richard Burton(twice), John Warner, Larry Fortensky (The American Film Institute named Taylor seventh among the Greatest Female Stars of All Time.)
Matthew 18:21-22 – 21Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? 22Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.
This is a double repost. It is about things that come in groups of seven. Thanks and praises go to Wikipedia. The other sources are cited where appropriate. Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
Math Jokes
Q: Why do they never serve beer at a math party?
A: Because you can’t drink and derive.
Q: Why won’t Goldilocks drink a glass of water with 8 pieces of ice in it?
A: It’s too cubed.
Q: What did Al Gore play on his guitar?
A: An Algorithm
Q: Why was the Calculus teacher bad at baseball?
A: He was better at fitting curves than hitting them.
Q: Why do you rarely find mathematicians spending time at the beach?
A: Because they have sine and cosine to get a tan and don’t need the sun.
Jokes are from facebook. Pictures are from The Library of Congress. This is a repost.
Attitude Of Pulchritude
@DawnQLandau #Bloggers @makingtimeforme @BelieveinBumble @tempkimkam @DawnMMiller @itmoi All joined the #AttitudeofGratitude this week. Check it out & tell us what ur #grateful for! … @becomingcliche @Fab_fiction still hoping you’ll join us! 💙 #blogging #gratitude The 2018 Annual Attitude of Gratitude: Bloggers Flood The Internet With Happiness & Positivity!
This tweet caught my eye. It was a lady, promoting a blog gimmick. You set a timer for fifteen minutes, and make a list of things you are grateful for. I am grateful for writing prompts, and decided to go for it.
Unfortunately, the timer was already in use. I had cut up some potatoes, and washed some greens. I put this in the steamer, and set the timer for a half hour. I did think to go to the kitchen, and make sure the heat was turned down. A steamer, full of burned food, is not something to be grateful for.
My kitchen timer is a gem. It is about four inches tall, and three inches wide. The knob broke soon after buying it. To set this timer, I have to use my fingers. You grab onto the metal fingers tight, and twist them into the desired position. It hurts a bit, but you get the desired results. I am grateful for not giving up on a perfectly good piece of equipment, just because it has one minor flaw.
A timer is not an automatic device. You have to remember to set it, just as you have to remember to turn down the heat on the stove. When the bell rings, you have to choose to get up, walk to the kitchen, and turn off the stove. If you are in the middle of doing something, it is easy to disregard the bell. This is not something to be grateful for.
This was supposed to be a numbered list. Some how, that just seemed boring and inventorial. Should I include a product number? Maybe I should get a barcode reader, and scan the number into a database. I have worked in a place where they used barcode readers to check in packages. Many of the readers did not work, and you had to manually enter the numbers. Then you would go upstairs with the package, and the number on the delivery label would not match the number on the receiving label. Or maybe I should just say I am extremely grateful not to be doing that sort of work today.
This is starting to become boring. While I am grateful for a certain amount of recreational boredom in my life, I am not going to add to it now. Pictures for this endeavor are from The Library of Congress.
The Second Great Flood
Here is part one . Somewhere in his drifting around the internet, PG found a reference to the story of Noah and the Ark. A light bulb above his head switched on, and the answer was apparent: Global warming is the second great flood.
In the Biblical story, G-d was upset with the way man did things. She gave Noah a heads up. Noah was ridiculed by the good citizens of the day. Finally, it rained forty days and forty nights, and everyone except Noah got wet.
In the modern version, G-d sees man making a wasteland of the bountiful planet. An amazing resource like oil is controlled by hateful tyrants, and burned to make cars run. The signs of dis ease are apparent to some, but they are ridiculed by the good citizens of the day.
This time, things are different. Instead of forty days and forty nights, it is two hundred years of burning fossil fuels. It is a time of war, and rumors of war.
Here is part two . PG was shooting from the hip the other day, and said that G-d was causing global warming. At first it seemed a bit goofy, but like other thoughts about her (G-d is in the details,) the more PG thinks, the more sense it makes.
A lot has to do with your idea of who G-d is. (maybe the four other w’s… what, when, where, and why… should also apply.) Although PG would not put global warming past Mary’s babydaddy, those conceptions are just a bit obsolete. The concept of G-d that PG uses is the fifth element, to go with earth, air, fire and water.
Some say that G-d is the difference between a human being and five dollars worth of chemicals. There seems to be an overall body of knowledge that makes the earth function. A DNA, or software. This framework of knowledge is part of the picture.
Right now, man is living in a paradise. A planet with earth, air, water and fire that is uniquely fabricated to support intelligent life. The role that G-d played in facilitating this planet is a mystery. There is a balance of life here…the right amount of gravity, the right ph balance in the oceans, the proper mix of gases in the atmosphere. Man has been granted this paradise…it was not earned, it was given out of the bounty of G-d. And man has done his best to destroy the environment. Promiscuously burning fossil fuels is just part of the damage.
If the level of CO2 in the air goes above a certain level, then the temperatures will start to rise. This has been proven time and time again. There are nay sayers…some of whom are not on fossil fuel industry payrolls… who say this is a natural process, and has nothing to do with the actions of man. These people are similar to the upstanding citizens who ridiculed Noah.
It should be noted that the story of Noah and the ark might be a myth. That is, it is full of symbols and allegory, and is not to be taken literally. It could be that in an ancient time, G-d got fed up with the evil deeds of man, and decided to teach a lesson. This could be what is happening today. Pictures are from The Library of Congress. This is a repost.
Nine Rules For Driving
What follows is a repost from a few years ago. The thoughts are current. Pictures are from The Library of Congress. Esther Bubley took the pictures in April, 1943. “Washington, D.C. Jitterbugs at an Elk’s Club dance, the “cleanest dance in town””
This is written as the Sunday morning worship hour winds down. In church facilities across America, preachers scream about sin. Very few will consider the sin of dangerous driving. And yet, this is the sin that can change, or end, your life in an instant.
There is a lot of label mongering in public spaces. Liberal, conservative, and racist are three of the most popular. None of these labels deals with driving courtesy. The SJW and the KKK are united in their lack of concern about safe driving. With that in mind, here is the top nine.
1- Find another way to show how bad you are. This is mostly a masculinity thing, but it just might apply to a few ladies. Driving hard and fast is the easy way to prove your toughness. All you do is push the gas pedal. You don’t have to go to the gym, have lots of sex, or go into battle. Just drive fast, and with no concern for your neighbor.
2- Slow down. There is no need to go so fast. When you go somewhere, allow yourself enough time to get there. The faster you drive, the less reaction time you have in an emergency.
3- Stay far enough behind the car ahead of you to stop in an emergency. This will be less stressful for the person in front of you.
4- Pay attention to the road. This is where cell phones, and texting, becomes a problem. You should be focused on the road ahead of you, and not what your phone mate is telling you. Your minutes will be just as good when you get to your destination. Are people really brainless enough to text and drive?
5- The three rules of the workplace apply here…. show up, stay awake, and don’t kill anyone.
6- Keep your car in good condition. The tires and brakes are key items, but also keep the engine running smoothly. Sometimes you need to accelerate.
7- Keep your temper. Driving while angry is a cause of many accidents, especially when combined with alcohol or religion.
8- Use your turn signals.
9- Show concern for the well being of your neighbor. Use common sense.
Chamblee54 
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