Chamblee54

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Vacuous liberal ‘wokeness’ is now beyond parody
Sam Smith asks to be called ‘they/them’ after coming out as non-binary
Interfaces Brasil/Canadá, Revista Brasileira de Estudos Canadenses
My thoughts on Male Circumcision Uncle Hotep
Blanks and Postage: Bob Dylan, Totally Normal Buddy
Homeowner shoots, kills 3 teens wearing masks
9 questions about furries you were too embarrassed to ask
Furry Convention Shows Milo Yiannopoulos the Door
The Mercers Wash Their Hands of Milo
You’re blocked You can’t follow or see @arhourigan’s Tweets. Learn more
Homeowner shoots, kills 3 teens wearing masks; 1 had a gun, police say
When Milton met Shakespeare: poet’s notes on Bard appear to have been found
The Working Families Party Has Written Itself Out of History
Adams-Duggan-Trawick House, Circa 1858, Linton
Gay in the 1940s with 91 yo Uncle George – Ep 103
Ed Buck arrested, charged with running drug den after latest guest overdose
Johann Hari shares fresh insights on the causes of depression and anxiety
Israel’s election results show Netanyahu is in serious trouble
The Ultimate Trip: Stanley Kubrick’s Space Odyssey
Lee Daniels Sets Cast For ‘The United States Vs. Billie Holiday’
With Andra Day, Trevante Rhodes, Garrett Hedlund & Natasha Lyonne
The Best (and Worst) Mindfulness and Meditation Jokes of all time
why the secret history is not going to be a movie
A Romanian TV-show host has been accused of ‘extreme racism’ after saying on air
that Serena Williams looks ‘like one of those monkeys at the zoo’
What really happens inside an Atlanta swingers club?
supremacist accidentally sets own head on fire while trying to burn down synagogue
Single Dad Who Talked Mom Out of Abortion But Is Tired of Single Parenting
‘Alt-right’ white supremacists have chosen Taylor Swift as their ‘Aryan goddess’ icon
Taylor Swift Claims She Had No Idea She Was a White Supremacist Icon
The Powwow at the End of the World By Sherman Alexie
When the Ideologues Come for the Kids
For White Teachers Teaching White Boys in the Suburbs
‘I Basically Just Made It Up’: Confessions of a Social Constructionist
Peterson Family Update – September 2019
September 22, 1975: The Sad Story of Oliver Sipple
25 Sexting Fails ~ Contradictions of Stone Mountain
what took you so long? I have power of attorney
ricco suave ~ Daisychain 086 – Noncompliant ~ satire ~ canceled/cancelled
jim croce ~ Trudeau does Blackface ~ no regrets coyote ~ elton john
rob zombie ~ goodbye america ~ Allusionist 106. Typo Demon ~ genitals jokes
I was going to google #BenShapiro genitalia I got as far as Ben Shapiro gen and google asked me if I wanted to see Ben Shapiro Genius I think I will quit while I am ahead ~ @chamblee54 @katrosenfield @tweetertation “in the meantime if we’re going to be talking about you know innocuous terms of phrase that make people uncomfortable I just want to put in right now that tickle my fancy and also get a wiggle on should be banned” ~ @annakhachiyan AOC is the perfect sex symbol for people who fundamentally don’t understand sex appeal ~ The English language needs a better way to express concern/apathy than to say that you give/ don’t give a damn/s***/f***. The first regards G-d sending a soul to hell. The second is animal waste, and should not be given to anyone, except a hungry plant. The third is a highly prized activity, whether given or not. ~ @dickcarousel I identify as a jackass. My pronouns are hee/haw ~ “Be not afraid! In admitting a creator, refuse not to examine his creation; and take not the assertions of creatures like yourselves, in place of the evidence of your senses and the conviction of your understanding.” Frances “Fanny” Wright (1795-1852) Scottish-American writer, lecturer, social reformer A Course of Popular Lectures, Lecture 3, “Of the more Important Divisions and Essential Parts of Knowledge” (1829) ~ pictures today are from The Library of Congress. Jack Delano was the photographer, in November 1941. George Ward and his wife and one of his five children with some of their canned goods. Meadow Crest, Greene County, Georgia ~ @OverheardOnDuty Part One And Two was performed last night in Decatur:
few coworkers follow me any more ~ i work with idiots we’re good i am
i think it’s an really good idea for ~ me to test my sirens at 2am
isss jess bullshit that ‘intoxxificated’ ~ is a hard word to say when yo drunkip
pregnant lady behind me buying kid ~ cigarettes with a toddler on her hip
are fat white people no longer obese ~ scary baby momma elbowgrease
part of my job involves finding cats ~ just don’t be unprofessional asshats
you’re not going to have a good time junk ~ g-d i swear to officer i’m not drunk ~ selah

Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end.
He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
When the Director of Nursing became aware of Edna’s heroic act, she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable. When she went to tell Edna the news she said:
“Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you’re being discharged. Since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another patient, I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness.
The bad news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in his bathroom with the belt of his robe right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he’s dead.”
Edna replied, “He didn’t hang himself. I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?”
This story is from an e-mail, and was not written by chamblee54. The author deserves your thoughts and prayers. Pictures today are from The Library of Congress. This is a repost

The day had been rolling along. Some dark clouds started to gather, and I saw relief from the hot weather. A strong rainstorm moved in. All was well, until the lights went out. A large tree fell on the power lines up the street. It was going to be a while before the juice came back on.
I did not want to spend a night in a dark house. There were a few possibilities. Then I remembered Tease Tuesday Burlesque Nerdtastic. Off into town I went. I was reminded why I don’t like driving at night. The oncoming headlights get brighter as you get older.
The format is simple. A lady gets on stage, wearing an elaborate costume. Bit by bit, the costume comes off. The g-string stays put. The boobs have pasties. Some of the pasties are festive. The boobies propel the sequin powered pasties into circadian circles.
The show was fun. I have only been to a few tittie bars, and did not especially enjoy them. I have been to a few drag shows, which is what TTBN reminded me of. A drag show with real girls.
I talked to one of the *movers and shakers* of the event at intermission. She went to her first condition when her mother was pregnant with her. This was the post-dragoncon event. The nerdiness was intentional. The lady agreed with my observation about drag shows. She said that she always wanted to be a drag queen, but told that she did not qualify. She showed her nay-sayers that she could, indeed, be a drag queen.
One of the acts in the second half had a trigger warning. If you did not like clowns, or simulated drug use, go hang out at the bar until she was over. The costume was dayglo clown makeup. The music was “Cocaine,” by Eric Clapton. Huge bags of *white powder” were displayed. At the end of the number, a bagful of pastie pastry flour decorated her clown face.
Before long, the show was over. There was not a bit of redeeming social value. It was one hundred percent entertainment.
The next stop was a nearby little shopping center. The first bar had a man singing karaoke, two people dancing, and five men sitting at the bar. The lounge across the parking lot had a drunken greeter, who was very glad to see me. I stayed for a minute or two, and went into the larger shopping center next door. The “wrinkle room” had gone out of business. The laundromat next door remains.
Since this was Tuesday night, I was surprised to see anyone out anywhere. I was even more surprised when the Heretic had a full parking lot. Their show was winding down, and I got in without a cover charge. It was a drag reality elimination. People had ballots, and were going to vote on who went to the finals next week. A six seven black man, wearing a glittering silver gown, asked me if I had voted. I told him that I saw cars in the parking lot, and wandered in. I did not stay to see who won.
Pictures are from The Library of Congress. I was too slack to take pictures of the show.

The 2019 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest is out. Here is part two of chamblee54 coverage. Part one was published yesterday. Pictures today are from The Library of Congress.
Rosemary was crushed, and no amount of time or sage advice could assuage her agony or, at the very least, reduce the swelling. Bob Pellicone, Lincroft, New Jersey
She had a captivating smile and eyes the color of a poisonous frog he’d seen on a trip to Costa Rica. Carol Hobart, Edina, MN
I knew that my husband was cheating on me, because I tasted his breath on the new maid’s lips. Andrew Kim, San Jose, CA
“God, would you please get your tentacles off of my stomach,” I uttered as Forrest groaned and slithered away from my bed; I swear, if anyone ever finds out I am dating an octopus, it will be social suicide. Riley Kwortnik, Ithaca, NY
After almost twenty years of baldness, Harry finally decided to splurge on an expensive, human-hair wig – after all, four hundred dollars to look twenty years younger was a small price toupée. Julian Calvin, Bellbrook, OH
They were tough men with tough jobs who frequented tough bars with rough, tough atmospheres, and the way they gripped their drinks, cigars, and cigarettes in a manly fashion never failed to impress the tough, hard-faced women who also frequented those same bars, and often ended up having their babies. Adam Johnson
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times – though any decent statistician might net those two factors together and conclude that things were fairly average all round.
David Meech, Auckland, New Zealand
His hot, fetid breath on the back of her neck pulled her from her sleep and she felt fear grip her as she recognized his presence and scrambled quickly to untangle herself from the sheets and exit the bed before Felix could hack up the forthcoming hairball. Krista Epton, Edmonton, Alberta
Standing at the altar, dressed in white, Lucy could not help but think of the suitors she had turned down—Jock, Dick, and Willy—all lovely men, but not as lovely as her ultimate choice, now standing proudly at her side, to whom the vicar turned and questioned, “Do you, John Thomas, take Lucy . . . ?” David Hynes, Bromma, Sweden
Accidentally dropping her phone, eyelids, and fake Ottawa Valley accent was not what Sarah Hemsworthington did best, or most often, or with the most confidence in her family of nine rather nasty siblings, and step-siblings, and half-to-one-quarter siblings—but it sure came close!
Marty Williams, Guelph, Ontario, Canada
It seemed a cruel irony to Nigel when he realized, only in hindsight, how mistaken he had been to abandon his youthful ambition to become a technical writer and bend to his parents’ wishes that he go into proctology. Scott Wilson, Corvallis, OR

The 2019 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest has arrived. Every year, BLFC presents examples of terrible writing. The Grand Prize winner was submitted by Maxwell Archer, Mt Pleasant, Ontario, Canada. Mr. Archer wins thoughts and prayers.
Space Fleet Commander Brad Brad sat in silence, surrounded by a slowly dissipating cloud of smoke, maintaining the same forlorn frown that had been fixed upon his face since he’d accidentally destroyed the phenomenon known as time, thirteen inches ago.
As a value added contribution to the festivities, chamblee54 compiles a list of noteworthy names. These were chosen because of their name/and or location. Appearing in order of appearance: Gwyneth Kozma, Garmisch-Partenkirchen, Germany, Ron Pizarie, Bath, PA, Bridget Parmenter, Norman, OK, Jeremy Das, Loughborough, England, Arlen Feldman, Colorado Springs, CO, Cody Hanna, Lancaster, PA, Coby J. Scott, Hollywood, CA, Saraswathy Ashok, Trivandrum, India, Harrison Glaze, Acworth, GA, Rob Greer, Queen Creek, AZ, Amy Torchinsky, Chapel Hill, NC, Greg Homer, Diamond Springs, CA, Tzipporah Harker, Baltimore, MD, Kelley Farmer, Dripping Springs, TX, Riley Kwortnik, Ithaca, NY, Evaonne F. Hendricks, Arcata, CA, Jose Beltrán Escavy, The Hague, David Meech, Auckland, New Zealand, Jim Jones, Massillon, Ohio, Krista Epton, Edmonton, Alberta, Cass Lennox, Switzerland, Everett Roberts, Washington, DC, Krista Epton, Edmonton, Alberta.
The High Gondonderil gazed on with horror as the Elgaborian legions marched at a single, pitiless pace into the once peaceful streets of Sar-Andrada, the capital city of the kingdom of Xanthil, located in a fantasy universe which might seem extremely confusing at present but which will doubtless make perfect sense to you, dear reader, once you realize that, like most fantasy universes, it’s basically just Tolkien’s Middle-earth with different names for things. Harrison Glaze, Acworth, GA This is the only Georgia resident displayed in 2019.
Emile Zola wondered the dank and soggy streets of a gloomy Parisian night, the injustice of the Dreyfus affair weighing on him like a thousand baguettes, dreaming of some massage or therapy to relieve the tension and pain in his aching shoulders and back, and then suddenly he thought of his Italian friends and their newly invented warm water bath with air jets and he rapturously exclaimed that oft misquoted declaration — “Jacuzzi!” Robert R Moore, North Falmouth, MA
Three days without food or water, archeologist Phil Thompson with his leg hopelessly trapped in a wilderness rock-fall, and with hungry buzzards circling overhead, saw his entire life pass before him and he once again experienced, as a child, his mother’s comforting words and tender touch, as she gently awakened him from his recurring nightmare of being eaten by birds. Ron Pizarie, Bath, PA
Realising that his symptoms indicated a virtually undetectable, fast acting neurotoxin, CIA coroner Quinn Abner frantically wrote up the details, lay on the floor and, as a professional courtesy, did his best to draw a chalk outline of himself. Jeremy Das, Loughborough, England
As he pounded on the door, Billy ‘Four-Toes’ Capalone, wondered, not for the first time, if he wouldn’t have been better off in the joint, or even taking a concrete nap, but instead, he straightened his tie and gripped his bible, determined not to blow his cover in the Jehovah’s Witness Protection Program. Arlen Feldman, Colorado Springs, CO
Eyes bleary from yet another night of fruitlessly staking out the Ritz Motel in West Hollywood’s seedier quarter, hoping to get some usable dirt on Mrs. Hennigan’s wayward hubby Bill, Niles Cranworth, P.I., pushed the start button, cranked the wheel over, and pointed his well-traveled Chrysler 300 southward on La Cienega Boulevard (“La Cienega,” he noted with irony, being Spanish for “the cienega”). Andrew Lundberg, Los Angeles, CA
It was a Dark & Stormy Night; the rain fell in torrents outside the Breast Western—the country-themed strip club where the exotic dance duo of Stormy and Dark rattled the house (for it was a Tuesday), and fiercely agitated the lustful flames of the patrons who struggled in the darkness to rearrange their Wranglers. Coby J. Scott, Hollywood, CA
Stephen Douglas, that’s the “Little Giant” to you, had tried everything he could think of to stop Mr. Lincoln from arriving at their senatorial debates: giving him the wrong time and place, sleeping pills disguised as Republican muffins, kidnapping, and even some light arson but the man always turned up, like a bad penny. Rob Greer, Queen Creek, AZ
The snow scattered like fair parmesan from God’s own shaker, drifting down lightly to cling to our squirming spaghetti skin beneath robes of tomato puree, making no distinction between the whole wheat and white or tagliatelle and bucatini among us. Tzipporah Harker, Baltimore, MD
Despite being a German, vegan book-cataloger from rural and upscale Connecticut, Marion was quite ignorant and overly opinionated about almost everything, except for Atlas Shrugged and atheism, which made her the embodiment of an Arian, vegetarian, ultracrepidarian-contrarian, non-sectarian, libertarian, librarian agrarian from Darien. Eric Mellinger, New York, NY
The villa in Tuscany is abandoned now, and nature, in the form of invasive vegetation, is reclaiming the small vineyard where Rodolfo and Susannah made love each afternoon, beginning with the creeping Coccinia virginiana, followed by the woody Polemonium gloriosa, and ending, of course, with the drooping Glandularia vulgaris. John Hardi, Falls Church, VA
Part two will appear later. Pictures are from The Library of Congress.

One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift… The next year, I didn’t buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, “Well, you still haven’t used the gift I bought you last year!”
My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, ‘Do you want to have Sex?’ ‘No,’ she answered. I then said, ‘Is that your final answer?’ She didn’t even look at me this time, simply saying, ‘Yes..’ So I said, “Then I’d like to phone a friend.”
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter took my order first. “I’ll have the rump steak, rare, please.” “Aren’t you worried about the mad cow?” “Nah, she can order for herself.”
My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, “What’s on TV?” I said, “Dust.”
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, “I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds .” I bought her a bathroom scale.
My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table. I asked her, “Do you know him?” “Yes”, she sighed, “He’s my old boyfriend…. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago and I hear he hasn’t been sober since.” “My God!” I said, “Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?”
When our lawn mower broke and wouldn’t run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the shed, the boat, making beer. It was always something more important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house… When I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I said, “When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway.” The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.
Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the van and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio and then I discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed and slipped back into bed.. I cuddled up to my wife’s back, now with a different anticipation and whispered, “The weather out there is terrible.” My loving wife of 5 years replied, “And, can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?”
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver’s License to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later. The woman said, ‘Unbutton your shirt’. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, ‘That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me’ and she processed my Social Security application. When I got home, I excitedly told my wife. She said, ‘You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.’
These human interest stories are borrowed from Expressing Myself. This is a repost, with pictures from The Library of Congress. “Halloween party at Shafter Camp for migrant agricultural workers. Shafter, California.” November 1938. Photographer: Dorothea Lange.