A Sentence Which Dances
“cant say much about that at this time” Thank you. Our justice system is flawed, to put it mildly. That said, there is little to be gained by talking before a trial. ~ @sadqueer4life here’s White Male! On the Internet with hit single “I Write Long-Winded Facebook Comments Not Tragedies” ~ That shirt is taking about itself. ~ @AllusionistShow Today’s etymological research has taught me that nice originally meant ‘stupid’. #yetagainetymologyruinseverything ~ Outside alcoholic beverages are not permitted by law. ~ This works better without rain. ~ He is another tool of #attentionwhoreindustrialcomplex His problem with Lady Jenner is that she gets more publicity than him. ~ Here is the source of this quote. GOOD THOUGHTS/GOOD WORDS/GOOD DEEDS Don’t be sidetracked by elaborate creeds and doctrines- the truth is as simple as it is profound. From the ancient teachings of Zoraster to today, these three principles have been the heart of the message of every G-d realized Master. ~ This is a busy crowd. Any day you choose is going to have conflicts. ~ The popup spam for this post said “We see you’re in Dacula” ~ Would SJW be an acronym with an implied plural nature, like POC and WMD? The plural of SJW is SJW. ~ What is going on under that pulpit anyway? That look on his face tells me he is having a good time. ~ The support of the United States ~ It takes we to be weird. ~ The motto of my blog used to be a quote from Hunter S. Thompson … When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. After a few months, it was pointed out to me that I was spelling weird incorrectly. ~ GA Price Level 2 – $324.50 plus applicable fees Ticket fees are $32.75 per ticket ~ Notify Me on Launch! Share your name and email address with Pagebacker View advertiser privacy policy ~ On this day, the Feast of the Sacred Heart of Jesus let’s remember that we are overwhelmingly loved. That Christianity is at its core the teaching of a radical lover and is an invitation to love one another in a way the offends the pious, defies the state and is beyond all conventional catagories. ~ Don’t they make papers now that will write themselves? ~ I really look forward to hearing what you have to say. I do moderate comments, but non-spam comments will take less than 24 hours to appear… Thanks! ~ many people consider the word “lame” to be offensive ~ The 5 Worst Conservative Reactions to the McKinney Pool Incident ~ if you must ~ who? ~ 2Dollarz Jesus wouldn’t be caught dead in cargo shorts ~ Icecold Davis Not for more than three days anyway. ~ You know what AlterNet brings you and millions of readers: A progressive truth squad and hundreds of articles a week — so you can use us for one-stop reading, when you are on the go. We are closing in on our Spring fundraising goal of $40,000 and need $5000 more to put us over the top. I very much hope you can help us. The coming months will be challenging to all of us. We need to be prepared. ~ This simple Facebook post will show you how TLC is the perfect example of ‘white privilege’ ~ Jesus Would Hate This Christian Blogger Just as Much as You Do ~ Dear Gawker, Jesus hates it when you lie about him ~ ‘The Ethel Merman Disco Album’ ~ @Brimshack False equivalence is a way of life for some people. @Wonkette ~ John don’t take any of it personally. It’s just their often unsophisticated and unenlightened opinion and none of it has anything to do with my life. ~ In an argument about race relations, all participants lose. ~ @MarkHarris Since you last logged on, we have become enraged at [person] for [transgression] & will not rest until [punishment]. –Twitter auto-greeting ~ I don’t mean teacher herself about dance, I mean teaching herself to write a sentence which dances Michael Silverblatt to Susan Sontag ~ @dusdus Linguistics, video games, comic books, horror movies, karaoke, fuzzy cats, being frustrated with American liberalism. Tweets don’t express anybody’s views ~ @WernerTwertzog I can no longer distinguish among the beards of hipsters, the orthodox, the homeless, the simply mad, and English professors. the spell check suggestion for @WernerTwertzog is Westerner ~ Q: Why did the blonde get excited after finishing her puzzle in 6 months? A: The box said 2-4 years! ~ pictures from The Library of Congress. ~ selah
Heather Has A Mommy And A Daddy
Heather Has a Mommy and a Daddy
Deep in the heart of Dullsville, at the end of a cul-de-sac, behind a lawn of scratchy brown grass dotted with giant plastic butterflies, three flaking cement deer, and a philodendron the size of Bob Hoskins though with fewer decorative parts, lives Heather Thompson. Heather has a mommy and a daddy. Heather’s daddy is an accountant. Her mommy is a homemaker. Before Heather was born they met, fell in love, and got married. “I love you very much and I’m having your child.”
Danitra is Heather’s best friend. One of Danitra’s dads is an empowerment facilitator. The other is an aura consultant. Danitra doesn’t know what they do at work, except they don’t need briefcases. Before Danitra was born her daddies met and fell in love, and after seventeen years spent discussing caring and support, handling acceptance, and negotiating intimacy, they had a commitment ceremony. “I love you very much and I’m designing the rings,” Danitra’s Daddy Mike said.
One day in school Heather’s teacher, Mrs. Weinberg-Lopez, tells the class to draw pictures of their families. Danitra draws two men, Julio draws two women, and Heather draws a man and a woman. Keanu points at the woman Heather drew, with squiggly yellow hair, a crude red dress and simple brown shoes. “This dad here’s got some ugly drag going on,” he says.
At lunchtime Danitra sits on the bench next to Heather and pulls a sandwich out of a brown paper bag.“Want to trade?” Danitra asks. “I’ve got grilled eggplant and goat cheese on marjoram foccacia.” “Um, I didn’t bring lunch,” Heather stammers, kicking her brown paper bag out of sight. “I’m … uh … on a diet.” “Diet?” Danitra asks. “Haven’t your dads told you not to buy into that patriarchal looks-based chauvinism? And anyway, what’s this then?” she asks, holding up the bag with “HAVE A SUPER DAY!” written in sparkle marker on it.
Julio, who was listening nearby, runs up and grabs Heather’s lunch. “Yeah, what’s this? It’s somebody’s lunch!” Heather jumps at the bag but Julio holds it out of reach. “You give that back!” Heather yells. “Try and make me!” Julio chides. He pulls Heather’s sandwich apart and drops it like it was electrified. He wobbles away, holding his stomach.
“Oh my God!” he cries. “There’s like dead stuff in there!” Danitra looks at the sandwich lying on the cement. “Is that MEAT? Is that like SPAM?” Claudia, sitting quietly at the other end of the bench, bursts into tears. “Heather’s eating BAMBI!” “It’s friggin’ Wonder Bread!” Julio scoffs. Keanu walks toward the bread and peers at it. “And it’s got LUBE all over it!” “You idiot, that’s MAYONNAISE.” “What’s mayonnaise?” “It’s like goat cheese for heterosexuals.”
“Heterosexuals?” Keanu asks. “Heather’s mommy and daddy are heterosexuals?” Heather starts to yell. “No! I don’t have a mommy and a daddy. I’ve got two daddies!” “Hell-OOOO!” Danitra says, drawing the word out to twelve syllables. “We can see your clothes!” “Um . . . “ Heather stalls, “then I’ve got two mommies.” “And we’ve seen you play baseball,” Julio answers.
Heather, unable to think of a response, sits on the bench and starts to cry. Danitra pulls a robin’s egg blue bandana from her pocket and dabs at Heather’s face. “Maybe your mom’s not really a woman,” Danitra offers. “Well,” Heather says, sniffing, “she cleans the house, and cooks, and does the laundry.” Danitra fumes. “We’re trying to establish that she’s female, not that she’s an idiot.”
“Maybe your dad’s not really a man,” Julio suggests.“Well,” Heather answers, wiping her nose. “He’s big and strong and he’s got a mustache.” Several of the children wonder what this proves but nobody says anything. “So let’s say you’ve got a mom and a dad,” Keanu says. “Then where did you come from?” “They went to bed together, and then I was born.” Some of her friends express further interest, but Heather doesn’t have a brochure. “Daddy put his thing in mommy — “
“Oh, man,” Keanu interjects. “Is that legal?” “HelLLLLO!” sings Danitra, who gets the word up to eighteen syllables this time. “We’re in CaliFORnia!”
“And nine months later I came out of my mommy’s tummy,” Heather adds. Several of the children wonder why they didn’t hire a surrogate with a vagina but nobody says anything.
Heather Has a Mommy and a Daddy, Part Two
One night there’s a dance at Heather’s school and her parents offer to chaperone. While Heather’s dancing with Danitra she sees from the corner of her eye her mom and dad moving onto the dance floor. She watches in horror as her mom just sort of stands there swaying, her gingham granny dress limply hanging to the floor. She grimaces as her dad starts chopping at the air like Jackie Chan being attacked by locusts.Occasionally their movements coincide with the beat. Heather runs to the bathroom crying.“Heather, don’t feel so bad,” Danitra says. “Lots of kids have embarrassing parents.” She starts to lead Heather out of the bathroom, then stops. “Um, maybe we should stay in here a while longer. They just started doing the Bump.”
One day the class projects are due. Heather brings in the model she’s made. It’s a lump of brown Play-Doh with ketchup poured over it and dotted with marshmallows stuck on with toothpicks. She sets it on the table as her teacher comes over to look.
“Why, Heather! That’s . . . nice! Very very nice!”“What the hell is it?” Tommy asks. “TOMMY! Heather’s parents had me over for dinner once. This is what they call ‘Salisbury steak.’” Heather bursts into tears. “NO IT’S NOT! It’s a VOLCANO! That’s lava, and that’s steam coming out.”
Danitra enters and places her project next to Heather’s on the table. “Why, Danitra, what’s this?” Danitra delicately removes the sheet protecting her project. “Versailles.”
Heather takes one look at the tiny replica of Louis XIV’s summer home, constructed by Danitra and her two dads out of two hundred cubic yards of teak plank, thirty square feet of gold leaf, sixty pounds of Italian travertine marble from the same quarry Michelangelo used, tiny topiary and functional miniature fountains, and cries even harder.
“Why did I have to have a mom and a dad?” Heather sobs. “Why can’t my family be like all the rest?”
Mrs. Weinberg-Lopez pulls Heather close. “Children,” she says,”every family is special, including those conforming to the rigid, stereotypical standard of male domination.” She starts to tell the class about her own family, including her hearing-impaired Hispanic mother, her height-challenged Israeli father, and her Gypsy recovering-substance-abusing brother-in-law and Armenian sex-addict half-sister, but stops, realizing the school year is only 4,074 hours long.
“Just because Heather’s parents are heterosexual doesn’t mean they’re slow-witted philistines, though there are strong correlations you don’t need a PhD in statistics to understand. But Heather is lucky to have a sweet mom and a wonderful dad and a dog named Molly and a hamster named Samson, and they all live together in a lovely house. They’ve got interesting avocado-colored appliances, carpet as long as your hair, and furniture that‘s by-and-large wood that must have taken them hours to assemble. There’s a big plastic sofa that turns into a bed, and a La-Z-Boy — ”
“A what?” Keanu asks. “A La-Z-Boy,” Mrs. Weinberg-Lopez repeats. “It’s a big vinyl chair that reclines.” “Oh, man!” exclaims Keanu, covering his face with his hands. “And I thought our Herman Miller reproductions were embarrassing!”
Mrs. Weinberg-Lopez continues. “But the important thing is, they’re a family. They’re a group united for a common purpose, where each individual is given a sense of empowerment and their shared bonds are formalized in a ritualistic manner.” “Oh,” the students respond in unison. Everybody hugs.
The story was borrowed from World Class Stupid.
Pictures are from The Library of Congress. This is a repost.
Broken Pencils Are Pointless
I tried to catch some Fog. I mist.
When chemists die, they barium.
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
Venison for dinner? Oh deer!
A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.
How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I’d never met herbivore.
I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.
I did a theatrical performance about puns . It was a play on words.
They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type-O.
Earthquake in Washington obviously government’s fault.
Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings, too.
Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there’s no pop quiz.
Energizer bunny arrested. Charged with battery.
I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn’t control her pupils?
What does a clock do when it’s hungry? It goes back four seconds.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!
Broken pencils are pointless.
What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
Velcro – what a rip off!
England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
All the toilets in New York’s police stations have been stolen. Police have nothing to go on.
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.
Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.
Pictures from The Library of Congress.
Human On Human Crime
@postcrunk but what about human on human crime? and why do humans destroy their own communities? ~ Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked ~ And if you want to get shitty, we can make it a big shitty party. We can all get funky together! Letter from Billie Holiday to Tallulah Bankhead ~ Is Drone Warfare Terrorism? ~ This is a matter for compassion and patience. This should be extended to people who slip up and use an improper pronoun. ~ @awkwardpodcast Ok, Internet: where do I start with Eckhart Tolle? ~ You are… Optimistic The things that you saw in the test cards show that you have an optimistic personality, are out-going, happy most of the time and have a healthy and strong mind. When you face a problem in life you tend to focus on the positive side of things, even if sometimes this might seem hard. You’re very courageous and active and easily dive into new challenges, rather than hide, avoid or run from them. Your capacity to adapt to new situations is high above the average which makes you an easy-going person always surrounded by lots of people and good friends. Good for you! ~ @WernerTwertzog When someone says, “I am going to be honest,” I believe that they either are lying now or that they lie habitually. ~ @awkwardpodcast Hey, internet: who am I supposed to be outraged at today? Please let me know ASAP, thanks! ~ @chamblee5 the #pronounpolice are busy with the Jenner person and will not be able to help ~ hrm An onomatopoeic word of the sound or hum you would emit when raising an eyebrow, expressing scepticism or mentally picturing something bizarre. by snowflake.beaver January 27, 2009 ~ Am I painting myself as a horrible human being right now? Lol ~ Not horrible, just controversial maybe. I need to read more to understand context. I see validity to both arguments. ~ I get tired of being lied to. ~ ” when we test the efficacy of our placebos, what will we test them against?” Fox news ~ Facebook has some strange stuff sometimes. “Pro-tip: Mediocre white “stand-up” comedians making racist remarks about President Obama = walking punchline. At least they will when I’m done with them.” The “racist remark” was calling the POTUS Barry. The life changing smackdown: “Honky you ain’t slapping shit except that two inch boner with a tweezer.” ~ i admire the work done by mohels i don’t think any jewish man has a bad circumcision ~ @illex The Burger King is there to collect the losing horses and turn them into delicious burgers. ~ Maybe it is a lunar thing. I had a bad case of the jesushatesme blues last night. Maybe today will be better. ~The spell check suggestion for jesushatesme is statesmen ~ “It’s okay to be happy when others are unhappy.” It is not something to boast about. It does not mean that you are better than the unhappy person. Especially when your happiness is related to their unhappiness. ~ Some “happy” peeps are awfully proud of their positive outlook. If you are not as happy as they are, it is your fault. ~ @nihilist_arbys Hey, you know what else produces the same shitty, doomed, meat based joke over and over? human vaginas. Arbys: it’s curtains for all of us. ~ Read French version here. ~ @pourmecoffee … adobe updates, you are the saddest suitor, relentless, reviled ~ @chamblee54 … chamblee 54, ignores adobe update, per pourmecoffee ~ The notion that a radical is one who hates his country is naive and usually idiotic. He is, more likely, one who likes his country more than the rest of us, and is thus more disturbed than the rest of us when he sees it debauched. He is not a bad citizen turning to crime; he is a good citizen driven to despair. H.L. Mencken ~ “Comparison is the thief of joy” – Theodore Roosevelt … Wikiquotes calls this “disputed.” The source given is “As quoted in Becoming a Great School (2013) by Cooper, Gustafson and Salah, p ix.” This does not sound like something Mr. Roosevelt would have said. It is probably a bit of anonymous folk wisdom, with a famous name attached. ~ @TheKevinAllison the spell check suggestion for apatheist is therapist ~ Franklin Graham is a convincing argument against nepotism. ~ go to espn check score of hockey match auto start player began turn page off last words were you can’t skip this geico ad ~ @WisdomOfChopra “Transcendence imparts reality to potential life” ~ @ChrchCurmudgeon Wouldn’t it be wonderful if a Christian horse wins the Triple Crown next year?~ pictures from “The Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library”. ~ selah
Rick Santorum Is Back
This is a double repost from a more innocent time. Former Senator Rick Santorum is running for President, again. Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
Rick Santorum is a former Senator from Pennsylvania. He wants to be President of the United States. If the voters of Pennsylvania fire you from the Senate, then you run for President. There is a certain logic to that. When you type “Rick Santorum weird” into google you get 989k results. Think Progress has a post with the prosaic title ” Rick Santorum’s 10 Weirdest Statements.”
Before we get to those, the ultimate Santorum weirdness (so far) is this quote from Letters to Gabriel, written by Karen Garver Santorum, the wife of the candidate. (Chamblee54 does not ordinarily hold personal tragedy up to ridicule. However, this is in the public record. The perp wrote a book. The children were 5, 3, and 1 at the time of this story.) The quote is from bs alert
“Santorum and his wife, Karen Garver Santorum, have six children. … In 1996, their son Gabriel Michael was born prematurely and lived for only two hours (a sonogram taken before Gabriel was born revealed that his posterior urethral valve was closed and that the prognosis for his survival was therefore poor). Karen Santorum wrote a book about the experience: Letters to Gabriel: The True Story of Gabriel Michael Santorum. In it, she writes that the couple brought the deceased infant home from the hospital and introduced the dead child to their living children as “your brother Gabriel” and slept with the body overnight before returning him to the hospital.” And now, the rest of the top ten.
1. “In every society, the definition of marriage has not ever to my knowledge included homosexuality. That’s not to pick on homosexuality. It’s not, you know, man on child, man on dog, or whatever the case may be….If the Supreme Court says that you have the right to consensual sex within your home, then you have the right to bigamy, you have the right to polygamy, you have the right to incest, you have the right to adultery. You have the right to anything.” [4/2003]
2. “Is anyone saying same-sex couples can’t love each other? I love my children. I love my friends, my brother. Heck, I even love my mother-in-law. Should we call these relationships marriage, too?” [5/22/2008]
3. On repeal of DADT: “I’m worried when many people will stand up and say, ‘well whatever the Generals want.’ I’m not too sure that we haven’t indoctrinated the Officer Corps in this country that they can actually see straight to make the right decisions.” [2/20/2010]
4. “I find it almost remarkable for a black man to say ‘now we are going to decide who are people and who are not people.” [1/19/2011]
5. “Marriage is an institution that’s a bridge too far for too many African-American woman and is not desirable among African-American males….I think [Obama] has to realize that flying to New York is…self-indulgent. Go down to the corner bar and have a drink, a shot and a beer.” [6/2/2009]
6. In far too many families with young children, both parents are working, when, if they really took an honest look at the budget, they might find they don’t both need to….The radical feminists succeeded in undermining the traditional family and convincing women that professional accomplishments are the key to happiness. [‘It Takes A Family,’ 7/6/2005]
7. Santorum responded to the Pentagon’s decision rescind its invitation to evangelist Franklin Graham to speak at the upcoming National Day over his statement that Islam is “evil” by saying that Graham’s comment was “a reasonable statement at the time.” [3/23/2010]
8. “I think the Democrats are actually worried [Obama] may go to Indonesia and bow to more Muslims.” [3/23/2010]
9. “The creeping Sharia throughout Europe and here in this country and in Canada. The Islamization of Europe that is already on the way and will visit these shores not too soon is a concern for us and something that we need to identify and we need to talk about and we need to fight with ounce of our being. [2/28/2009]
10. “Now we have the Attorney General confirming to Osama bin Laden just bide your time and the effeminate and pampered Americans will cower away.” [2/28/2009]
Bonus If this is not enough, be sure to visit spreading Santorum. The more hits the site gets, the higher it’s google ranking is. The fun never stops.
The facebook friend (who is pretty cool in real life) started this adventure with this comment: “If one more person posts that bogus Santorum quote as fact, I will shoot myself. Satire is lovely, but not when people don’t even bother to fact check anymore. In other news, I’m out of cigarettes.”
This inspired three comments. “any negative publicity that brings that asshole into question is worth posting. God forbig anyone post any untruths about our President. Anyone should verify the source of any information beyond “saw it on the internet”. LOL In other news, I miss your face!””Google “bogus Santorum quote” and you get 98 million results.””I mean the one about gay porn and the Taliban going viral right now.”
Rick Santorum is a loose cannon. (The frothy mix is generally a loose product as well.) With a personality like that, it is tough to tell real from fake. With Americans dreading the rest of this Presidential campaign, it is only natural to exaggerate the strange things said by the former senator.
The offending misquote is: 
“While the Obama Department of Justice seems to favor pornographers over children and families, that will change under a Satorum Administration. I will ban all pornography. Especially gay pornography. Gay pornography is the reason people choose the gay lifestyle or what I call the deathstyle. If we got rid of that, homosexuality would be gone within a matter of months. This is one of only a few things I see eye to eye on with the Taliban.”
The top result is from that trusty advertiser of insurance products, snopes. “The quote cited in the Example block at the head of this page about “banning all pornography — specially gay pornography” is not something that was actually stated by Rick Santorum; it’s a spoof combining elements from the candidate’s above-cited statement on pornography and his previously expressed views on homosexuality. This item originated as a graphic image posted on Facebook to the Presidential Quotes section of Americans for a More American America, a political satire site.”
With the exception of the attached gif, the rest of the first page results were boring. Glenn Beck was listed, but PG cannot find any Santorum. It might blend in.
Computer Contest
Jesus and Satan were having an on-going argument about who was better on the computer. They had been going at it for days, and frankly G-d was tired of hearing all the bickering. Finally fed up, G-d said, ‘THAT’S IT! I have had enough. I am going to set up a test that will run for two hours, and from those results, I will judge who does the better job.’
So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away. They moused. They faxed. They e-mailed. They e-mailed with attachments. They downloaded. They did spreadsheets. They wrote reports. They created labels and cards. They created charts and graphs. They did every job known to man. Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was faster than hell.
Then, ten minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course, the power went off. Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld. Jesus just sighed.
Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them restarted their computers. Satan started searching., screaming: ‘It’s gone! It’s all GONE! ‘I lost everything when the power went out!’
Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the past two hours of work. Satan observed this and became irate. ‘Wait!’ he screamed. ‘That’s not fair! He cheated! How come he has all his work and I don’t have any?’ G-d just shrugged and said, “JESUS SAVES”.
This repost is courtesy of gartalker. Pictures are from The Library of Congress .
Temporarily Unable
Contributions to the Black Conservatives Fund are not tax-deductible as charitable contributions for federal income tax purposes. ~ And I have no doubt that every new example will succeed, as every past one has done, in shewing that religion & Govt will both exist in greater purity, the less they are mixed together. James Madison ~ many sex workers advertise having an automatic transmission, when in fact they drive a stick shift ~ @SlavojTweezek Academic journals, as we all know, are necessary to ensure that cutting-edge knowledge may be disseminated within 6 years. ~ @NairYasmin Can we see oppression in its far more insidious forms than simply that of disallowing two people from entering an oppressive institution? ~ monsanto putting the gross back in groceries ~ This posting has been flagged for removal. [?] (The title on the listings page will be removed in just a few minutes.) ~ @JesusIsAThug hair extensions? the bible said adam and eve, not adam and weave ~ what happened to steve ~ Steve is weaving hair extensions. ~ Cam I love you dearly but sometimes you are just strange! Of course, I think you plan it that way! ~ It is good to know the difference between genuine wisdom and a clever turn of words. ~ he who delights in solitude is either a wild beast or a god ~ 509 Bandwidth Limit Exceeded The server is temporarily unable to service your request due to bandwidth limit has been reached for this site. Please try again later. Proudly powered by LiteSpeed Web Server Please be advised that LiteSpeed Technologies Inc. is not a web hosting company and, as such, has no control over content found on this site. ~ if a tree falls in an empty forest, does the chainsaw make a sound? ~ You philosophers are sages in your maxims, and fools in your conduct. Benjamin Franklin ~ I had good luck at the Chamblee Plaza thrift store. Mondays are 50% off on all purchases. No jokes about men”s pants half off, please. ~ This podcast deals with “coming out” to friends, etc,, about mental health issues. While listening to it I realized that almost everyone I know has some sort of mental health issue. ~ @WisdomOfChopra “God is only possible in exponential observations” ~ This is what happens when you are too cheap to pay for good musicians. ~ @WernerTwertzog Academe is important for preventing highly intelligent and altruistic people from having any impact on society whatsoever. ~ @JoyceCarolOates Look in junk literature for the definition While there, decide what definition of junk you want Junk religion might be fun ~ @WernerTwertzog I do not remove the dead from my enemies list because I shall see them, again, in hell. ~ There is a saying … you should never go grocery shopping when you are hungry. ~ this picture has 4075 comments, 7,379 shares, 75,132 likes. There is no hope for the human race ~ Six things you need to know about Isis: Astarte, Hecate, Demeter, Kali, Iana, Diana ~ Wayne, I admire your commitment. That said, I suspect you have a lot of free time if you are going to see all the videos and read all the articles. If you take notes, this might make for interesting reading. ~ Photo manipulation programs are dangerous. ~ This content is currently unavailable The page you requested cannot be displayed right now. It may be temporarily unavailable, the link you clicked on may have expired, or you may not have permission to view this page. ~ @WernerTwertzog I am told I have resting-German-director-face. ~ @postcrunk coincidences are the universe’s inside jokes ~ Miss Teenage South Carolina spells it Caitlin Upton. ~ This might be a symptom of a community that meets only for parties. Many gatherings are not good for non-happy discussion. ~ @mbsycamore do the #pronounpolice work for the #CaitlynJennerIndustrialComplex? ~ Is this cultural appropriation? ~ When a religion is good, I conceive it will support itself; and when it does not support itself, and God does not take care to support it so that its professors are obligated to call for help of the civil power, it’s a sign, I apprehend, of its being a bad one. Benjamin Franklin ~ Cursive, as in flowing handwriting, seems to be connected etymologically to cursing, as in using naughty language. Certainly, some people trying to read cursive have cursed. As it turns out, the two words have different roots. ~ The person said something about “friends” the problem is this person unfriended me when I called bs on this video ~ Pictures from The Library of Congress. ~ selah
Author Insults
These author insults were borrowed from flavorwire. HT to Andrew Sullivan The pictures are from The Library of Congress This is a repost.
25. Gertrude Stein on Ezra Pound “A village explainer. Excellent if you were a village, but if you were not, not.”
24. Virginia Woolf on Aldous Huxley “All raw, uncooked, protesting.”
23. H. G. Wells on George Bernard Shaw “An idiot child screaming in a hospital.”
22. Joseph Conrad on D.H. Lawrence “Filth. Nothing but obscenities.”
21. Lord Byron on John Keats (1820) “Here are Johnny Keats’ piss-a-bed poetry, and three novels by God knows whom… No more Keats, I entreat: flay him alive; if some of you don’t I must skin him myself: there is no bearing the drivelling idiotism of the Mankin.”
20. Vladimir Nabokov on Joseph Conrad “I cannot abide Conrad’s souvenir shop style and bottled ships and shell necklaces of romanticist cliches.”
19. Dylan Thomas on Rudyard Kipling “Mr Kipling … stands for everything in this cankered world which I would wish were otherwise.”
18. Ralph Waldo Emerson on Jane Austen “Miss Austen’s novels . . . seem to me vulgar in tone, sterile in artistic invention, imprisoned in the wretched conventions of English society, without genius, wit, or knowledge of the world. Never was life so pinched and narrow. The one problem in the mind of the writer . . . is marriageableness.”
17. Martin Amis on Miguel Cervantes “Reading Don Quixote can be compared to an indefinite visit from your most impossible senior relative, with all his pranks, dirty habits, unstoppable reminiscences, and terrible cronies. When the experience is over, and the old boy checks out at last (on page 846 — the prose wedged tight, with no breaks for dialogue), you will shed tears all right; not tears of relief or regret but tears of pride. You made it, despite all that ‘Don Quixote’ could do.”
16. Charles Baudelaire on Voltaire (1864) “I grow bored in France — and the main reason is that everybody here resembles Voltaire…the king of nincompoops, the prince of the superficial, the anti-artist, the spokesman of janitresses, the Father Gigone of the editors of Siecle.”
15. William Faulkner on Ernest Hemingway “He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.”
14. Ernest Hemingway on William Faulkner “Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?”
13. Gore Vidal on Truman Capote “He’s a full-fledged housewife from Kansas with all the prejudices.”
12. Oscar Wilde on Alexander Pope “There are two ways of disliking poetry; one way is to dislike it, the other is to read Pope.”
11. Vladimir Nabokov on Ernest Hemingway (1972) “As to Hemingway, I read him for the first time in the early ‘forties, something about bells, balls and bulls, and loathed it.”
10. Henry James on Edgar Allan Poe (1876) “An enthusiasm for Poe is the mark of a decidedly primitive stage of reflection.”
09. Truman Capote on Jack Kerouac “That’s not writing, that’s typing.”
08. Elizabeth Bishop on J.D. Salinger “I HATED [Catcher in the Rye]. It took me days to go through it, gingerly, a page at a time, and blushing with embarrassment for him every ridiculous sentence of the way. How can they let him do it?”
07. D.H. Lawrence on Herman Melville (1923) “Nobody can be more clownish, more clumsy and sententiously in bad taste, than Herman Melville, even in a great book like ‘Moby Dick’…. One wearies of the grand serieux. There’s something false about it. And that’s Melville. Oh dear, when the solemn ass brays! brays! brays!”
06. W. H. Auden on Robert Browning “I don’t think Robert Browning was very good in bed. His wife probably didn’t care for him very much. He snored and had fantasies about twelve-year-old girls.”
05. Evelyn Waugh on Marcel Proust (1948) “I am reading Proust for the first time. Very poor stuff. I think he was mentally defective.”
04. Mark Twain on Jane Austen (1898) “I haven’t any right to criticize books, and I don’t do it except when I hate them. I often want to criticize Jane Austen, but her books madden me so that I can’t conceal my frenzy from the reader; and therefore I have to stop every time I begin. Every time I read ‘Pride and Prejudice,’ I want to dig her up and hit her over the skull with her own shin-bone.”
03. Virginia Woolf on James Joyce “the work of a queasy undergraduate scratching his pimples.”
02. William Faulkner on Mark Twain (1922) “A hack writer who would not have been considered fourth rate in Europe, who tricked out a few of the old proven sure fire literary skeletons with sufficient local color to intrigue the superficial and the lazy.”
01. D.H. Lawrence on James Joyce (1928) “My God, what a clumsy olla putrida James Joyce is! Nothing but old fags and cabbage stumps of quotations from the Bible and the rest stewed in the juice of deliberate, journalistic dirty-mindedness.”
Bonus. Mary McCarthy on Lillian Hellman “Every word she writes is a lie, including and and the.”
Bonus two, a comment to the original post.: RomanHans Re “The Cardinal’s Mistress” by Benito Mussolini, Dorothy Parker wrote one of my favorite bon mots: “This is not a book to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.”
Bonus Three, from Flannery O’Connor “I hope you don’t have friends who recommend Ayn Rand to you. The fiction of Ayn Rand is as low as you can get re fiction. I hope you picked it up off the floor of the subway and threw it in the nearest garbage pail. She makes Mickey Spillane look like Dostoevsky.”
The Death Of Jimi Hendrix
The current episode of WTF podcast features Marshall Crenshaw, a Jimi Hendrix fan. He discusses reports that Mr. Hendrix was murdered by Michael Jeffrey, his manager. This is a repost.
“The rock legend Jimi Hendrix was murdered by his manager, who stood to collect millions of dollars on the star’s life insurance policy, a former roadie has claimed in a new book. James “Tappy” Wright says that Hendrix’s manager, Michael Jeffrey, drunkenly confessed to killing him by stuffing pills into his mouth and washing them down with several bottles of red wine because he feared Hendrix intended to dump him for a new manager, according to a report in the Mail on Sunday. In his book, Rock Roadie, Mr Wright says Jeffrey told him in 1971 that Hendrix had been “worth more to him dead than alive” as he had taken out a life insurance policy on the musician worth $2m (about £1.2m at the time), with himself as the beneficiary. Two years later, Jeffrey was killed in a plane crash.
These rumors have been around for years. Whenever someone famous dies under mysterious circumstances, people wonder why. If you google the phrase “was Jimi Hendrix…” the suggested searches are left handed, a hippie, black, and murdered.
Mr. Wright’s story is denied by Bob Levine, the United States manager of Mr. Hendrix. He says Mr. Wright waited until 2009 to tell this tale, and he did it to increase book sales. Mr. Levine is legally blind after suffering a stroke. Bob Levine and Tappy Wright are not friends.
“The Orlando-based Wright says the ex-manager (Levine) “wanted me to baby-sit him” because Levine’s alienated his family and staff. “Levine used to say, ‘If you don’t come through, I’m going to slag your book,'” claims Wright, who adds that he has a “signed and notarized” statement from Levine saying that “it’s about time somebody wrote the truth about Jimi’s death. He also did a video interview.” Levine denies Wright’s claims. Levine says he is legally blind from his stroke but has “people taking care of me.” Levine adds that he didn’t discuss Hendrix’s death in the video and has no recollection of signing the notarized statement. Asked why he chose to speak out about the book now, Levine says: “Tappy dared me. He said, ‘There’s no one left to challenge me.'” Adds Wright, “I’m just correcting the story.”
There is a story from an physician who was at the hospital when Jimi Hendrix was brought in.
“John Bannister the on-call registrar at the now closed St Mary Abbots Hospital in Kensington, said in an interview that the patient seemed to have “drowned” in a large amount of red wine.” The last paragraph of the Telegraph story is an amusing post script. “Bannister now lives in Sydney and worked as a doctor until 1992 when he was deregistered for fraudulent conduct.”
Everyone in this story is either dead or sketchy. Michael Jeffrey seems to have been a nasty piece of work. He was a former intelligence agent for Britain’s MI6 agency. There are reports of stolen money, numbered bank accounts, and gangster business tactics. Reportedly, Mr. Hendrix was busy getting new management. The last paragraph of the blog critics story is perhaps the most intriguing.
“Michael Jeffery reportedly perished in a plane crash over France in 1973. But his remains were never found. Eric Burdon, Noel Redding, and others believe he may have checked luggage but slipped away during the boarding process. Jeffery was due in London court the very next day to defend himself in several huge lawsuits relating to his embezzlement, money laundering, and fraud.”
Surviving The McMansion Next Door
Many houses in the metro area are doomed. When you have a little fifties tract house sitting on platinum land, the future is obvious. If you are happy in your little house, you might have neighboring houses torn down. Construction can be a painful process.
PG got a document, Homeowner Survival Kit During Construction. Some of the text is reproduced below. There were document copies, which are available here.
The rules in these emails are for pre-Brookhaven Dekalb County. You might want to do a little research, and see what the rules are for your area. The different governments have different departments governing construction. Some are going to be more responsive than others.
1- Zones are highlighted for your area. If you see unsafe or dangerous acts, call your zone inspector, or chief, and register your complaint.
2- If your property, fences, plants trees, home, is damaged, first get name of worker/equipment operator, supervisor, and finally company, make complaint, then determine who is liable for repairs, and, more importantly, who will pay.
3- Obtain business cards from all vendor companies, or names and phone numbers from the signs or equipment. You may need them later.
4- Keep a log of various operations, i.e. grading, silt fencing, foundation, footing, framing, waterproofing, etc., again for future reference.
5- If workers use yard as toilet immediately call area building inspector. There should be a porta potty installed for every ten workers.
6- Female homeowner should dress appropriately to discourage negative attention by workers.
7- Remember, these suggestions are only a few of the possible acts that may be violations of the international residential code for one and two family dwellings, 2000, which is in use in GA currently. DeKalb County, and Brookhaven, also have building codes.
8- The development department officials work for you, the tax payer. Don’t hesitate to call any one of them if you feel there is a need.
Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
Chamblee54 
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