Advice From Britney Spears
Twitter superstar @tejucole is on a roll. His 140 character droppings have been seen before. Earlier this morning, PG found a gutbomb in the archive. “The White Savior Industrial Complex is not about justice. It is about having a big emotional experience that validates privilege.”
The subject today is the culture of inspirational quotes. PG is in the choir loft for the sermon.
@tejucole Area Man Wins Irony Prize for Battling Quote Culture With Quotable Tweets
@tejucole Sentimentality culture is inspirational quotes, solutionism, white saviorism, un-intersectional feminism and, yes, the Global War on Terror.
@tejucole The mistake is to separate inspirational quotes mania from the ideological conditions that confine people in sentimentality culture.
@tejucole But (I warn myself): so much social critique comes down to “my consolations are superior to yours.” Why begrudge people their pleasures?
@tejucole Britney Spears and the Department of Defense: the reactionary, nonsensical aspects of quotation-madness are obvious.
@tejucole America itself becomes a quote-only zone. The politician’s “misspeak.” The president’s fine sentence in a speech. While the drones drone on.
@tejucole But none of us can resist the lure of these stupid aphorisms. Writing them, sharing them. Sugary calories in 140-character servings.
@tejucole Everything I feared and hated about “inspirational quote” culture came to pass here @tejucole To write less straight, more queer.
@tejucole Thinking about unquotability, irreducibility, downworthiness. About how the consolation of the quotation can short-circuit justice.
@tejucole It is a truth universally acknowledged that analysis, no matter how torturous, will be reduced to its most “inspirational” quote.
@tejucole There will be more photography of this weekend’s Super Bowl than there has been in a decade of a massively destructive War on Terror.
@tejucole “Never doubt yourself. Never change who you are. Don’t care what people think and just go for it.” Britney Spears
As much as PG enjoys Mr. Cole, he does not believe everything he reads on twitter. The BS quote required a bit of investigation. This gem appears in the embedded video at the 4:46 point. The interviewer asks three female entertainers if they have any advice for young people.
The next person to speak, after Miss Spears, was Mary J. Blidge. Her suggestion was to finish high school, put G-d first and final, and listen to your mother. Perhaps this is the quote that should be tweeted. Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
Conversations I Am Tired Of Having
There was a post a while back, 10 Conversations On Racism I’m Sick Of Having With White People. The original started at The Chronicle, but LiveJournal is kind of weird, so a mirror image will have to do. There are comments, at the sourced post, that illustrate some of the points covered today.
I got to thinking about “10 Conversations”, and a reply began to take shape. I started a list of conversations the I am tired of having, and before you could say affirmative action, there were a dozen items. Many of these incidents have involved people of color, or POC. Many others have not. Often, the ethnicity of the other person has little importance to the discussion. Therefore, the title of this feature will not be racially specific. This monolog will probably not go viral, or even bacterial. Washing your hands might be a good idea when you are finished reading.
Meetings where one person does all the talking The word conversation implies that more than one person says something. Often, this does not happen. One person will talk for a while. Before person two finishes a sentence, person one will interrupt them.
This does not work. When the other person is talking, shut up and listen. Don’t be thinking of your clever comeback, but pay attention to what the other person is saying. What the other person says is just as important as what you say.
Listening is not valued in our culture. It is seen as a loss of control, a sign of weakness. It is really a sign of strength. If you are weak, you don’t want to allow the other person to say anything. Have you ever heard anyone boast about the clever things that they say to someone? Of course you have, just like you never hear anyone talk highly about himself because he is a good listener.
My question is not an excuse to make a speech. Some people have an agenda. Whatever you say is an obstacle to the message they want to broadcast. When you ask a question, some people think you are handing them the talking stick, to do whatever they want. When your eyes glaze over, they plow on, in total disregard to your discomfort, and lack of comprehension. It is almost as if they are talking to hear the sound of their own voice.
I’m not talking to you. If you are screaming something, anyone with earshot can hear you. Do not get offended if there is a reaction to your words, especially if it is subtly directed at the person you are not talking to. This applies to the internet as well, where all of humanity is *privy* to your innermost thoughts. Keep the farmyard meaning of *privy* in mind when sharing your innermost product.
Conversations should be with people. If you are a business, and you want to tell me something, send me a written message. Please refrain from using robocall machines. I feel very foolish talking to a machine, especially one that doesn’t understand southern english.
You don’t have to shout. The amount of truth in a statement is not increased by the volume of expression. If you are standing next to me, the odds are I can hear you in a normal tone of voice. If you are across the room, come stand next to me, rather than shout across the room. If your normal tone of voice is shouting, then you have a problem.
The same principal goes to controlling your temper. When you choose not to control your temper, you show disprespect to yourself, and the person you are talking to. There is no situation that cannot be made worse by angry speech.
Privilege Racial polemic is getting more subtle these days. We are not quite post racial, although there are rumors of a PostRacial apartment complex in Dickhater. The phrase that pays these days is Privilege. This is always something owned by the group you do not belong to. Last summer, I heard this quote in a discussion, and nearly fell out of my chair.
From the N word to POC. Labels for groups of people can cause problems. I have expressed myself on the N word before, and don’t have much to add. As for POC, that is even sillier. Colored people is an insult, but people of color is preferred. I am sure some of you have a terrific speech to ‘splain this, but I am not interested. My neck may be red, but that is a color. PWOC is an insult to my humanity, whether you are talking to me or not.
This is getting longer than the attention span of many readers. It might be continued at a later date. This is a repost. Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
Coexist
The custom of expressing your innermost thoughts on the back of your vehicle has taken a curious turn. One popular emblem says coexist. The seven letters are equipped with symbols, both religious and secular. One hopes that no one receiving this message has forgotten to stop, and hit the car with the coexist symbol on the bumper.
When PG was young, there was a miniature golf course on Cheshire Bridge Road called Putt Putt. The first bumper sticker he saw said “I play Putt Putt.” Is coexist an improvement?
When this post was first conceived, the i in coexist was perceived to be unadorned. It was as if the religion of i was receiving due recognition. Upon closer examination, it seems as though the tittle has a five pointed star. This means that the i is a sorcerers wand. The i apparently stands for paganism.
The c, x, and t of coexist are pretty obvious. They are symbols for the three Abrahamic religions. O is a peace sign, and e has the male and female symbols. The religions they represent are not apparent. The s is a yin yang, which is somehow related to Taoism.
Buddhism, Atheism, Communism, and Hinduism are not represented. They spell out Bach. The composer produced glorious music for the Lutheran church. He also had twenty children. Perhaps the e in coexist represents the left out denominations. Pictures today are from The Library of Congress.
What Is Dirty About Louie Louie?
The sixties were a great time to be a kid. As long as you were too young for a Vietnam Vacation, there were kicks to be had.
One of the more enduring legends was the dirty lyrics to “Louie Louie”. Recorded by an obscure band called the Kingsmen, the song was a massive hit in 1963 (It never was Number One). When WQXI put out lists of the greatest songs of all time, “Louie Louie” was at the top of the list. This is despite, or because of, the raucous sound. The song was recorded in one take, when the band thought they were playing a rehearsal. The vocals are difficult to make sense of, and rumored to be obscene. No one was ever quite sure why. With the garbled sound on the record, the listener could hear almost anything they wanted to.
The Governor of Indiana, Matthew Welsh, banned radio stations from playing the song in that state. On February 7, 1964, Attorney General Robert Kennedy got a letter from an outraged parent about the lyrics to “Louie Louie”. An F.B.I. investigation followed. After thirty months of investigation, the Bureau concluded that they could not make sense of the lyrics.
PG had a neighbor named Carol. A tomboy who could whip most of the boys, she had a pet skunk named Napoleon. Carol claimed to have heard a band at Lenox Square play “Louie Louie”. “He said the words real slow so you could understand them. I can’t repeat what he said, but it was dirty”.
Louie, Louie Oh no, me gotta go.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, said, ah
Louie, Louie Oh, baby, me gotta go
A fine little girl she waits for me Me
catch a ship for cross the sea.
Me sail that ship all alone Me never think how I make it home.
Ah, Louie, Louie No, no, no, no, me gotta go.
Oh, no. Said, Louie, Louie Oh, baby, said we gotta go.
Three nights and days I sail the sea Think of girl, oh, constantly.
Ah, on that ship I dream she there
I smell the rose, ah, in her hair.
Ah, Louie, Louie Oh, no, sayin’ we gotta go.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
but, ah, Louie, Louie Oh, baby, said, we gotta go.
[Yelled] Okay, let’s give it to ‘em right now! [instrumental]
Me see Jamaica, ah, moon above.
It won’t be long, me see me love.
Take her in my arms again, I got her; I’ll never leave again.
Ah, Louie, Louie Oh, no, sayin’ me gotta go.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
But, ah, Louie, Louie Oh, baby, said, ah, we gotta go.
I said we gotta go now, Let’s get on outta here.
[Yelled] Let’s go.
Transcribed by David Spector Sept. 2000 Public Domain. If anyone reading this can explain what was so dirty about this song, please leave a comment. Thank you Wikipedia for your help in assembling this. This is a repost. Pictures by The Library of Congress
The Wrong Way
PG was eating breakfast. He was sitting at the machine, where he spends most of his waking, at home, hours. He was looking at his latest blog post, and thinking how cool it was. He fed a spoonful of food in his mouth, followed by a sip of tea.
Something went wrong. Somehow, the tube for breathing was open at the wrong time, and food and beverage went into an improper medium. Immediately, the food product came out. The monitor and keyboard were decorated.
Gasping for air, trying to expel the rest of the misdirected meal, PG got up and ran to the bathroom. Coughing violently, with tears coming out of his eyes, the last of the misdirected meal exited the quivering orifice. Fright began to set in. This was very close to a fatal situation.
While the prospect of working was not pleasant, the idea of spending this day, and innumerable days to come, in a lifeless state, was worse. While the idea of living long enough to labor eight more hours is quaint to some, today it will just have to do.
Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
What City
The facebook crowd has been all atwitter about a new quiz, What City Should You Actually Live In? (The twitter crowd has not returned the compliment.) PG thought he would check it out. It is a colorful affair. The first question is “How do you take your coffee?”. There are nine options. This test is 100% graphics, which means you cannot copy the possible answers. Typing them all is too much work.
The second question is “Whats your jam?” Apparently, strawberry is not an option. This is about a favorite song. There is only one the PG recognizes, and it is far from his “jam.” While the heroic substance intake of Guns and Roses is to be admired, this should not be confused with wanting to hear that song more than once every five years.
PG is eating leftover pizza while reading question three, “What could you eat forever?” This comfort level is destroyed on the next two, “Pick a #hashtag” and “Pick a Beyonce?” Pick your nose does not seem to be an option for either.
People don’t like to hear this, but PG does not have a bucket list. He is also a retired drunk. So much for questions six and seven. None of the above is not listed as an option anywhere.
The answer: London. Let’s be honest, you probably look pretty good in a Burberry trench coat. You’re the type of person who loves city life, but without all the hype. Your ideal day consists of the Tate Modern, a pleasant evening at a nice restaurant, and a hot cup of tea before bed.
Pictures are from The Library of Congress.
Rumi Said What?
The other day, PG was fumbling through facebook, and there was a lovely quote. “I am not this hair, I am not this skin, I am The Soul that lives within. Rumi.” The poem seemed like good words to paste in front of pictures. PG is squeamish about copyrights, and decided to see if the translation belonged to anyone. Veteran readers should know where this is going.
Jalāl ad-Dīn Muhammad Balkhī, also known as Jalāl ad-Dīn Muhammad Rūmī, has become popular with the meme crowd. Mr. Google says: Born: September 30, 1207, Vakhsh, Tajikistan Died: December 17, 1273, Konya, Turkey. With his name abbreviated to four easy to pronounce letters, translations of his poems are popular. Often, the words are pasted on beautiful pictures.
Some killjoys say that this is wrong. “Yet this popularization has had a price, and the price is a frequent distortion of Rumi’s words and teachings … The English “creative versions” rarely sound like Rumi to someone who can read the poems in the original Persian, and they are often shockingly altered– but few know this, and the vast majority of readers cannot but believe that such versions are faithful renderings into English of Rumi’s thoughts and teachings when they are not.”
Lets look at the quote that started this story. It has such a perfect rhythm, and such a catchy rhyme. What relation to the original does this have? Does anyone know the name of the original poem?
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad could tell you a few things about the difficulty of translating Farsi into English. This is even more true when the translator has an agenda. On Fox News, some are trying to lead to war. Those translating a thirteenth century poet are trying to create peace. While the meme motives may be more noble, their integrity in using languages is equally suspect.
The killjoy article has some examples of Rumi poem “versions,” with footnotes. One is “Not Christian or Jew or Muslim, not Hindu, Buddhist, sufi, or zen. Not any religion or cultural system.” The comment: ” …is especially absurd. There is no evidence Rumi knew much more about Judaism or Christianity than what is said in the Qur’an– not to speak of other religions.” (The source article goes into more detail about this quote, and about the specific so called translators.)
Pictures are from The Library of Congress. Spell check suggestion for Rumi: Rum.
Math Jokes
Q:Why do they never serve beer at a math party?
A: Because you can’t drink and derive.
Q: Why won’t Goldilocks drink a glass of water with 8 pieces of ice in it?
A: It’s too cubed.
Q: What did Al Gore play on his guitar?
A: An Algorithm
Q: Why was the Calculus teacher bad at baseball?
A: He was better at fitting curves than hitting them.
Q: Why do you rarely find mathematicians spending time at the beach?
A: Because they have sine and cosine to get a tan and don’t need the sun.
Jokes are from facebook. Pictures are from The Library of Congress. This is a repost.
Singers Who Wear Wigs
If you go to google, and type in “singers that wear wigs”, the first name to appear is Mary J. Blige. PG does not follow her closely, but went to youtube and found a video. This is probably not her real hair.
Dolly Parton is known for a lot of things, at least two of which are real. The hair is not. If you ask her “How long does it take to do your hair?”, she says “I don’t know, I’m never there”
If anyone is known for enhancing her natural attributes, it would be Cher. Her fondness for plastic surgery is well known, as is the way her head fits in a hairpiece. In this number, Mrs. Bono talks about some of her favorite people.
Grace Slick is basically retired these days. In her hey day, she never appeared in public in her real hair. PG saw her at the Omni once, and was horrified by her wig. ( Grace sells her paintings these days. Her white hair is cut short. The wigs are in a museum.)
RuPaul is not really blonde. That is a part of her wardrobe. In this video, she co stars with Martha Wash, in a remake of “It’s Raining Men”. The working title for this video was Piggly Wiggly.
It is a bit of show business wisdom that you put the horses at the end of a parade. Deaundra Peek fills this important role today. Last year it was a remake of “Supermodel”, which has copyright issues. Today, it is a cooking lesson. The last three characters of the Youtube code are M2M.
This is a repost. Pictures are from The Library of Congress. As a bonus to our reader(s), we will explore the issue, Does Lady Gaga wear a wig? The answers are a bit contradictory, which is somehow fitting. One page says she does not wear a wig, but does wear extensions in some videos. Another answer is that dying her hair is damaging to the hair, if she went to a salon the paparazzi would see her, so yes, she does wear a wig. If you have too much free time, here is a forum discussion on this subject.
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