Joni Mitchell
Tuesday is Joni Mitchell’s 81st birthday. Roberta Joan Anderson was born November 7, 1943, in Fort Macleod, Alberta. For this birthday tribute we will revisit four previous posts. one two three four Pictures are from The Library of Congress. … A facebook friend went on a Joni Mitchell kick. First it was a link to an interview. Then it was a quote from The Last Time I Saw Richard. A lady said Blue was her favorite album all all time, and a man enthusiastically agreed.
Given the apples and oranges quality of her catalog, it would be tough to pick one album as a favorite. I soon realized that fbf was going to be thirty soon. I am sixty. These are two different perspectives on the craft of Joni Mitchell. One has driven through the storm, not knowing what was next. The other is presented with an almost complete body of recorded work.
I have known about Joni since high school, and been a devoted fan since 1976. Joni’s most popular album, Court And Spark, came out in 1974, eleven years before fbf was born. Who would be the equivalent female musical force from 1943, when I was minus eleven? The answer is nobody. (Coincidentally Roberta Joan Anderson was born on November 7, 1943.)
After the comment about Blue, I listened to For The Roses. Joni’s craft is like a cluster bomb … there are lines that you never fully felt, bomblets waiting to explode in your gut. Let The Wind Carry Me has one of those hidden threats. Mama thinks she spoilt me, Papa knows somehow he set me free, Mama thinks she spoilt me rotten, She blames herself, But papa he blesses me.
The first thing I heard by Joni was Big Yellow Taxi. It was on The Big Ball, a 1970 mail order sampler from Warner Brothers. This was when Joni shacked up with Graham Nash. The next year saw Blue, followed by For The Roses, and Court And Spark. I always thought Joni was someone he should like, but somehow didn’t. It wasn’t until 1976 that I broke through the barrier, and became a Joni Mitchell fan. Seeing her in concert did not hurt.
On February 3, 1976, I took a study break. (I scored 100 on the test the next day) Joni Mitchell was playing at the UGA coliseum a few blocks away, and the door was not watched after the show started. I found a place to stand, on the first level of the stands. The LA express was her band that night, and created a tight, jazzy sound, even in the UGA coliseum. Tom Scott pointed at Joni, said she was crazy, and drew circles around his left ear. The one line I remember is “chicken scratching my way to immortality” from Hejira.
The Hissing of Summer Lawns might not be her best album, but it is certainly her bravest. Court And Spark was a commercial success. Instead of producing a bestselling followup, Joni took a ninety degree turn. Summer Lawns, for all its eccentric sparkle, confused the record buying public. The gravy train took off in another direction.
In those days, 96rock played a new album at midnight, which people would tape. On the night of the Lynyrd Skynyrd plane crash, the album was Hejira. This was followed by Mingus, another curve ball. Finally, Don Juan’s Reckless Daughter appeared, and did not make a good impression.
The eighties, nineties, and aughts appeared. Joni and I lived our lives. 1996 saw a frightening interview in Details magazine. It was startling to see that for all her granola glory, Joni Mitchell might not be a very nice person. In a pot and kettle moment, David Crosby said “Joni’s about as humble as Mussolini.” Music is a tough way to make easy money.
More recently, there was a long interview on Canadian television. She is not mellowing with age. The cigarettes have not killed her, even if her voice is not what it once was. The recent albums that I have heard are strong. There seem to be more on the way. Maybe the facebook friend will have have the “what is she going to do next” experience after all.
A few weeks ago, I was at the library. I had a story to take home, before going over to the biography section. There I found Reckless Daughter: A Portrait of Joni Mitchell. At least with fiction, you know you are dealing with a made up story. With biography, you have to use judgment.
It is a familiar story. Joni was born in the frozen north, was a rebellious girl, and got pregnant. She gave up the daughter for adoption, only to be reunited many years later. Joan Anderson gets married to, and divorces, Chuck Mitchell. Joni sings, writes, tunes her guitar funny, becomes a star, gets too weird to be popular, makes and loses money, smokes millions of cigarettes, and becomes an angry old lady. There is a bit more to the story than that. Reckless Daughter fills in a few of the blank spots.
Millions of cigarettes might be an exaggeration. Joni started smoking when she was nine. When she was a star, she was almost as well known for her constant puffing as her pretty songs. When Joni was in a Reagan era slump, she was going through four packs a day. Just for the sake of statistics, lets call it two packs, or forty fags, a day. Multiply forty by 365 and you get 14,600. If she started at 9, and had her aneurysm at 72, that gives you 63 years of nicotine abuse. If you assume that there were forty fags a day for 63 years, that gives you 919,800 smokes. IOW, while seven figures is not out of reach, it is rather unlikely that Joni smoked more than 2,000,000 cancer sticks.
The author of Reckless Daughter, David Yaffe, is a problem. He talks about the mood of America in 1969, four years before he was born. Mr. Yaffe goes to great lengths to show us that he knows about making music. Some readers will be impressed. There are mini-essays on Joni songs from her golden years, the time between “Ladies of the Canyon” and “Hejira.” And gossip, gossip, and more gossip. Joni is well known for her celebrity lovers.
We should make the point that I enjoyed Reckless Daughter. The inside stories are fun, and pages turn over without too much head scratching. Maybe this is a statement about the career of Joni Mitchell. You enjoy the music for many years, and then complain about the details. Reckless Daughter follows the trajectory of other celebrity biographies. The star is born, takes up a craft, gets a break, becomes successful, goes over the mountaintop into a long decline. With Joni, nothing after “Mingus” was well received. The chanteuse was broker, and angrier, by the minute.
On page 13, Joni hears Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini by Sergei Rachmaninoff. This is the piece that makes her want to be a musician. One page 129, we learn the story of A&M studios in Hollywood. At one time, The Carpenters were in studio A, while Carole King was recording “Tapestry” in studio B. Joni was recording “Blue” in studio C, which had a magic piano. One time, Carole King learned of a break in the studio C booking, and ran in. Three hours later, “I feel the earth move” was recorded.
A few years later, Joni was on the Rolling Thunder tour with Bob Dylan. One of the concepts was support for Rubin “Hurricane” Carter, whose story can be found elsewhere. Joni became disillusioned with Mr. Carter. When Joan Baez asked Joni to speak at a benefit concert, Joni said she would say that Mr. Carter was a jive ass N-person, who never would have been champion of the world. Joni later got in SJW trouble for posing in blackface, for the cover to “Don Juan’s Reckless Daughter.”
On page 251, we learn that Bob Dylan does not dance. Other items include “Free man in Paris” being written about David Geffen, and Jackson Browne writing “Fountain of Sorrow” about Joni. Mr. Browne is a not-well-thought-of ex of Joni. As for Mr. Geffen…. Joni stayed at his house for a while, at a time when Mr. Geffen was in, and out, of the closet. Did they make sweet music together?
So this book report comes to an end. Joni is recovering from a brain aneurysm, and will probably not produce anything else. The book is going back to the library, and I will move on.
Joni Mitchell has product to promote. She gave an interview to New York magazine, where she smoked a few cigarettes and expressed a few opinions. There were enough attention getting comments to make the news.
“When I see black men sitting, I have a tendency to go — like I nod like I’m a brother. I really feel an affinity because I have experienced being a black guy on several occasions.” She proceeds to tell a story about dressing like a down and out black man as a way of dealing with an obnoxious photographer. “I just stood there till they noticed me. I walked really showily, going, Heh heh heh. It was a great revenge. That was all to get his ass. To freak him out. I had to keep him on the defensive.”
Gay-mafia-made-man David Geffen was a target. “I ask her about a painting, visible in a vestibule, on the way to her laundry room, of a curly-haired man with a banana lodged vertically in his mouth; turns out it’s Geffen, and she painted it. “Before he came out. He’s never seen it,” she says, before explaining: “He was using me as a beard. We were living together, and he’d go cruising at night. He was very ambitious to be big and powerful, and he didn’t think he would be [if he was openly gay].” By 1994, the two had fallen out over her insistence that he didn’t pay her enough in royalties.”
The product is a four cd boxed set, Love Has Many Faces: A Quartet, A Ballet, Waiting To Be Danced. There was a single one star comment about the joniproduct. Al Norman Seems like a collection of Joni’s forgettable tunes February 3, 2015 ~ “My wife loves Joni Mitchell, and never listens to this set. Seems like a collection of Joni’s forgettable tunes.” This comment was sponsored by Head and Shoulders. “100% flake free hair & A GREAT SCENT”
You just can’t get away from capitalism. Ms. Mitchell heard “… on the radio, a record executive “saying quite confidently, ‘We’re no longer looking for talent. We’re looking for a look and a willingness to cooperate.” As interviewer Carl Swanson notes, “For now, she’s hoping that people buy her boxed set, with her self-portrait on the cover. To that end, she gives me a Joni Mitchell tote bag with one of her paintings on it to carry my things home in. Get the word out.”
Joni Mitchell gave am interview recently to a Canadian Broadcaster. She is famously Canadian. The chat was in her California living room, which is littered with her paintings. Many of the paintings are things like Saskatchewan at forty below. Mrs. Mitchell alternates between painting and music, which tend to balance her cigarette fueled mind.
The CBC interview is paired with a more formal chat in Toronto. She could not smoke during the Toronto interview. The Toronto interviewer is just a bit smarter than Jian Ghomeshi, who endured the second hand smoke in California. Mr. Ghomeshi said things like “The song “Woodstock” defined a generation.” Mrs. Mitchell was in a New York City hotel room that famous weekend.(Spell check suggestion for Jian Ghomeshi: Joan Shoeshine)
There are some juicy quotes. Art is short for artificial. When listening to Joni songs, you should look at yourself, and not at her. Free love was just a gimmick for the men to get laid. False modesty is pointless. Sylvia Plath was a liar, or maybe it was Anne Sexton. (James Dickey said that Sylvia Plath was the Judy Garland of American letters.)
A fearsome foursome gets in the game. Someone screamed, on a live album. “Joni, you have more flash than Mick Jagger, Richard Nixon, or Gomer Pyle combined!.” Years later, the fan introduced himself to Mrs. Mitchell.
The conversation mentioned Bob Dylan. He is from Northern Minnesota, and not quite Canadian. Apparently, Mrs. Mitchell kicked up a fuss with some comments in 2010. ” Bob is not authentic at all. He’s a plagiarist, and his name and voice are fake. Everything about Bob is a deception. We are like night and day, he and I. … Grace [Slick] and Janis Joplin were [sleeping with] their whole bands and falling down drunk, and nobody came after them!”
Did Bob Dylan and Joni Mitchell ever tune up together? Joan Baez, a similarly named contemporary, is well known for dating Mr. Zimmerman. Ms. Baez did sing at Woodstock.
Mrs. Mitchell doesn’t exactly take back her comments about Bob Dylan. ““I like a lot of Bob’s songs, though musically he’s not very gifted. He’s borrowed his voice from old hillbillies. He’s got a lot of borrowed things. He’s not a great guitar player. He’s invented a character to deliver his songs. Sometimes I wish that I could have that character — because you can do things with that character. It’s a mask of sorts.”
In a kill the messenger moment, Mrs. Mitchell lashed out at the interviewer from the 2010 piece. It is odd, since he didn’t ask any trick questions. Black and white transcripts are tough to deny. “The interviewer was an asshole.” (The body part is bleeped.) “I hate doing interviews with stupid people, and this guy’s a moron” “His IQ is somewhere between his shoe size and (unintelligible)”.
The troublesome 2010 interview was conducted with John Kelly, a Joni Mitchell tribute artist. “JK: Drag does have a power, though — that netherworld of a thing you can’t quite know, which makes people nervous. JM: Drag wasn’t always counterculture. In his memoirs, Nixon talked about the Harvard and Yale men in power who would put on these plays where they dress like women, and Milton Berle did a kind of “hairy drag.” Becoming a gay thing made drag go underground.” Did Mick Jagger and Gomer Pyle ever do drag with Richard Nixon?
Your Racism
This is a repost from 2014, and the Mike Brown case. … Last night, in anticipation of the Grand Jury presentation, chamblee54 published Freedom Lies Bleeding. “grand jury renders opinion ~ national hissy fit begin again ~ when justice is popularity contest ~ freedom lies bleeding in street”
There was a comment. Anonymous said, on November 25, 2014 at 2:28 pm (Edit) “Thanks Luthor… you’re racism never disappoints!” The name was misspelled.
There is both style, and substance, to consider here. Is Freedom Lies Bleeding racist? Who knows? The definition of racism is growing, in carcinogenic fashion, as we speak. Some say it is systemic institutions of oppression. Some say it is jokes about toothpaste flavor. Maybe the best definition is that racism is anything that you do not like.
The poem was directed at the concept of mob rule. As President Obama said, “We are a nation built on the rule of law, so we have to accept this decision was the grand jury’s to make.”
A few years ago, O.J. Simpson was accused of murder. Many people thought he was guilty. After a long trial, he was found innocent. Should popular opinion have overruled the jury? No, it should not. The jury saw the evidence, and heard the arguments. The people can protest and debate, but they cannot take the place of a jury.
Is a dependence on a system of law and order racism? Anonymous seems to think so. Is they qualified to make this judgment? If racism is anything that you don’t like, then Anonymous is qualified to make the call. Maybe they knows something we don’t.
There is the style of the comment to consider. While Anonymous did not give their name, there was an I.P. address. The IPA is connected to a .edu server. Apparently, this is a workplace computer. Leaving insulting comments from your employer’s computer does not reflect well on the institution.
Anonymous is entitled to an opinion. However, leaving a name calling comment does not speak well for this individual. The six words say more about Anonymous than they do chamblee54. Pictures today are from “The Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library”.
The D-List
November 4, 2024 was the day before this year’s election from hell. It was also the first monday, which means Little 5 Poetry Bash. Last night saw five people in the audience. The emcee, the feature, the feature’s business manager, and two poets.
Manley Pointer was one of the supporting poets. With little new material, he sought refuge in the archive. The verses were divided into groups. Poems to be proud of. Poems of varying quality.
At the bottom of the barrel, The D-List reared its gnarly head. Doggerel that should be burned, but would release toxic fumes. Underground poems, that are so bad they need to be buried. Sonnets that would make the corpse of Willie Shakespeare weep. Iambs that would make the pentameter hide in shame. The D-List was the source that Manley Pointer chose this dark and stormy night.
Under Powerless Alienation (Acrostic)
morphodite democratic delusion · cracker employment asylum martyr
killer media self is an illusion · if you assume everyone is smarter
needle on fingers of an open grope · noodle protest against humidity
opiate the futility of hope · not smiling idiot stupidity
lilac never be dishonest weasel · under powerless alienation
testosterone altruistic people · hear affirmation find inebriation
eager starvation somnambulist · rocking and rolling materialist
Donald Trump Spam
little kim jong un of north korea · a disgusting lie unprofessional
radical islamic diarrhea · catastrophic and unacceptable
it could have been so easy now a mess · publicity seeking lindsey graham
famously got caught lying to congress · an authority on donald trump spam
crooked hillary clinton it was great · enthusiastic dynamic and fun
general pershing of the deep red state · will again be the best in world war one
dems would do are just wasting time · don’t believe fake news nursery rhyme
Devil Gooberhead #whyiwrite
having so much culture thrown at me · can’t sing dance or draw little rabbits
stay away from less healthy habits · novel that maybe two people will read
conversation with voices in my head · becoming socially acceptable
ignore a reality tv vegetable · possession by a devil gooberhead
no one listens to me when I speak · stun people with pretentious rhetoric
im not really good at anything freak · rant roast or a judgmental limerick
go listen to idiots having fun · bringing my nightmares to everyone
Am I Blonde Today #DeepThoughtsFromKimKardashian
why am i famous for just being me · did thesaurus live in jurassic park
when can i see through peoples clothes · what direction should i name my next kid
what does science have to do with math · why does that much dirt get left in a hole
someone told me orange is also a fruit · am i blonde today is this my moment
bad directions on a shampoo bottle · is indonesia a sleeping disorder
if cameras have a round lens model · why is the picture square with a border
if you never wear underwear neighbor · then you will never need toilet paper
Eighteen Questions
Eighteen Questions was originally published November 3, 2008. It is a set of questions about popular topics. I copied 18Q off either facebook or LiveJournal. We will include answers from two people. Pictures today are from The Library of Congress.
The late Michael Liebmann is the source of 18Q. Michael passed away July 26, 2016, due to complications from surgery. Unfortunately, we had been out of touch for a number of years. We had been facebook friends, and one day I discovered that Michael “unfriended” me. As is usually the case, I was not given a reason. I suspect that it was my non-support of Israel.
18Q was written in 2008, and many of the answers below are obsolete. I regret that Michael was not part of my life for six years before his passing. I recall Michael supporting Israel’s attack on the Mavi Marmara. This was a Turkish ship, carrying aid to Gaza in defiance of the Israeli blockade. An American citizen, Furkan Dogan, was killed. The incident was in 2010. Michael unfriended me shortly afterwards. I have not been to Dim Sum since then. …
I sometimes do dim sum with a man named Michael Liebmann. He has a LiveJournal, under an alternative identity SFFilk. SFF goes to festivals, sets up a table, and sells CDs of folk music. (Warning: sketchy Geocities link.) Folk was misspelled as filk, leading to the handle Southern Fried Filk. SFF is the source of today’s questions. We will present both his answers, and Chamblee54’s reply. Many of the answers seem strange in 2024.
1. Do you have the guts to answer these questions and re-post as The Controversial Survey? SFF Yes C54 Yes. I also have the toenails, eyebrows, and lumbar discs. Guts are overrated, and more plentiful as we move into middle age.
2. Would you do meth if it was legal? SFF No C54 No. Just because something is legal doesn’t mean you need to join the crowd. Voting Republican is legal.
3. Abortion: for or against it? SFF For C54 Like the lady said to the Pope, if you don’t play the game, then you don’t make the rules.
4. Do you think the world would fail with a female president? SFF There have been female presidents before, like Indira Gandhi. C54 It might, but would pass again soon. Fail and pass are part of the cycle, and should be accepted and embraced.
5. Do you believe in the death penalty? SFF Yes C54 As long as it is not too severe.
6. Do you wish marijuana would be legalized already? SFF Yes C54 That should have happened a hundred years ago. Reefer was legal a hundred years ago, and should have remained that way.
7. Are you for or against premarital sex? SFF For. I can’t get married, so any sex I have would be premarital. C54 See answer to question 3.
8. Do you believe in God? SFF Yes C54 This is not a believe kind of thing. I suspect that God does exist, although the semantics of the issue are sticky.
9. Do you think same sex marriage should be legalized? SFF Yes C54 Yes. However, lawyers and Professional Jesus worshippers should not be allowed to reproduce.
10. Do you think it’s wrong that so many Hispanics are illegally moving to the USA? SFF Yes. As the grandson of immigrants who came here legally, I don’t exactly tolerate the fact that so many people are coming here illegally. If they want to come, let them do so legally! C54 This is a toughie. My families have been here hundreds of years. This is getting into question 3 territory. If I were a poor Mexican, and the barriers to legal immigration were steep, I might have a different opinion.
11. A twelve year old girl has a baby, should she keep it?
SFF I don’t know C54 It depends on where she finds it.
12. Should the alcohol age be lowered to eighteen? SFF I think it’s 18 here in Georgia. C54 It was 18 when I was a kid. I spent many a happy evening in bars. However, in the eighties, big brother federal government said to the states, if you want federal highway money, then you need to raise the drinking age to 21. In asphalt happy Georgia, that was a no brainer. To get back to the question, yes, the drinking age should be 18.
13. Should the war in Iraq be called off? SFF I’m not sure “called off” is the proper term. C54 We have dug ourselves a deep hole in Babylon. Even if we were to start to withdraw today, it would take a year or so to get everyone out. There is reason to believe that forces would attack our troops during this withdrawal, and that we would have to fight our way out. There is also the matter of the Sunni tribes that we are paying to help us fight foreign fighters. What will happen when we introduce these guys to the American concept of the layoff? It is a lot easier to start a war than it is to finish one. This is one reason I was opposed to the start of this one.
14. Assisted suicide is illegal: do you agree? SFF I’m not sure. C54 Physician assisted suicide does seem to be illegal. As to whether it should be legalized … why does a person need help? Shouldn’t it be fairly simple to off yourself?
15. Do you believe in spanking your children?
SFF Yes, if they did wrong. C54 See answer to number 3.
16. Would you burn an American flag for a million dollars? SFF Considering the fact that the proper way to dispose of a worn flag is by burning it, C54 Flag burning was a non issue until 1989. Somebody took a case to the Supreme Court, and there was a ruling made. At that point, flag burning became a “hot” issue. This is similar to what is happening with Gay Marriage now. There is little grass roots support for same sex marriage, but a court ruling has forced the public to decide. While the media account execs in California are getting big commissions now, the rest of the population has been dragged into a divisive battle that few wanted. Maybe we should burn the Supreme Court instead.
17. Who do you think would make a better president? McCain or Obama? SFF Honestly? Neither one. C54 What does honesty have to do with presidential elections?
18. Are you afraid others will judge you from reading some of your answers? SFF Yes, but at least I’m being honest. C54 What does honesty have to do with the internet?
Cemetery Blues
The facebook friend said “Today is Dead Poets Remembrance Day, Oct. 7th, the day Edgar Allan Poe died. Be sure to visit a graveyard and read some poetry today”. I didn’t have anything better to do. This is a repost from 2010.
The first obstacle was finding a book of poetry. I am not a poetry person. A look at the shelf turned up a paperback, 125 Years of Atlantic. Poetry was to be found between those covers.
The book had two stickers, both saying 69 cents. At the old Book Nook, this meant that the book was half the price on the sticker. With tax, that would be 38 cents.
125 YOA had stayed in my car for a few years. Whenever I was stuck somewhere with time to kill, this book was waiting. One afternoon in 1998, there was a slow day at work. I read a remembrance by Gertrude Stein, about life in France at the start of World War II.
The cemetery of choice was connected to the Nancy Creek Primitive Baptist Church. I have driven by this facility thousands of times. He walked past the graves until he found a fallen tree to sit down on.
The first poem was “Looking for the Buckhead Boys” by James Dickey. I began to read out loud, and soon could smell the drug store air of Wender and Roberts. The author bought fifty cents worth of gas at a Gulf station. Today, fifty cents might buy a tablespoon of gas. Gulf was long ago bought out by BP. Wender and Roberts became a bar, which was torn down.
Buckhead is not what it used to be. When Mr. Dickey was the bravest man in Buckhead (he took a shit in the toilet at Tyree’s pool hall), I was not even thought of. The traffic jams on Peachtree Street are still there, as the blue haired ladies follow poets into the ground.
When I finished reading Mr. Dickey, he put a teal postit in the book, where the poem stood. I looked up, and the graveyard seemed different. Maybe the sun had sank a bit in the sky, and maybe the poem had changed me in a way he could not put into words. Maybe another poem was the answer. Take the glasses off, open the book at random, and turn the pages until a poem shows up.
On page 404…the historic Atlanta area code…was “The Wartime Journey” by Jan Struther. The 1944 work was unknown territory. A group of people are traveling on a train. The wounded vet, the untried recruit, the salesmen shared the space with a lady, taking a baby for her soldier husband to meet. The theme of the rhymes was that America was totally at war, and that war is different from peacetime. Today’s war in Babylon is not like that.
Halfway through the reading, a freight train pulled by. Today, passenger trains are a novelty, and freight rules the rails. The shipment today was double decked containers, ready to pull off and slap on an eighteen wheeler. Just look at all that money.
Deaths are said to come in threes, and reading poetry in a graveyard should be the same. PG went on a random search for a Moe, to go with Curley and Larry. A page of poems by Emily Dickinson was the result. The page left me unmoved. It was as if I was back in the sixth grade, with a horrible English teacher forcing me to memorize Hiawatha. It was time to go home.
An Old Farmer’s Advice
Many of you have heard “An Old Farmer’s Advice”. This is a repost. Pictures are from “The Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library”.
“Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong. Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance. Life is simpler when you plow around the stump. A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor. Words that soak into your ears are whispered…not yelled. Meanness don’t jes’ happen overnight. Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads. Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you. It don’t take a very big person to carry a grudge. You cannot unsay a cruel word. Every path has a few puddles. When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty. The best sermons are lived, not preached. Most of the stuff people worry about ain’t never gonna happen anyway. Don’t judge folks by their relatives. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll enjoy it a second time. Don’t interfere with somethin’ that ain’t botherin’ you none. Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance. If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin’. The biggest troublemaker you’ll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin’. Always drink upstream from the herd. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment. Lettin’ the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin’ it back in. If you get to thinkin’ you’re a person of some influence, try orderin’ somebody else’s dog around. Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to G-d!”
No one knows who the old farmer is, or what he grew. Some say he really worked in an office writing ads for Massey Ferguson. Some say he had a bull farm, and believed in the product. In this age of industrial strength commodity wisdom, the first reaction of some is to look to google. In this case, you can go to a forum at Snopes. No one claims to be the grandson of the old farmer.
“My father in law is an old farmer. He’s given me some advice. It was more like: Don’t try to fix a broken porchlight in a rainstorm. corollary: Disconnect power to the sprinkler system before fiddling with the wiring. If you wear longer socks, the chiggers won’t bite you. Cool Whip makes everything taste better. Do whatever your mother in law says.”
quote: “A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.” ~ “Yeah, but you try getting a bumble bee to plow your fields. With the tiny little plows attached to their wings, it could take days.”
quote: “Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly…” ~ “And above all else, verb adverbly … There’s my problem, I’ve been living deeply, loving simply and speaking generously.”
quote: “Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.” ~ “I’m not sure of the lesson here…you should leave a bunch of tree stumps in your farm fields? But then you lose valuable real estate, the crops have to compete with the tree roots, and combine harvesting is significantly more dangerous. Maybe, if you take just a little time to remove the stump properly, it pays dividends and saves you time and energy in the long run. … But life is a lot cooler, and more productive if you go down to the general store, buy a few blasting caps, and blow that mother to kingdom come.”
“The sentiments aren’t too bad, but they missed “Now get orf moy laaand!” from the end…”
quote: “Most of the stuff people worry about ain’t never gonna happen anyway.” ~ “Oh, so I shouldn’t worry about not being able outrun a bumble bee on my John Deere tractor? Thanks.”
quote: Always drink upstream from the herd. ~ “But, unless your at the absolute source of the river, there’s always another herd further upstream.”
quote: The biggest troublemaker you’ll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin’. ~ “I knew it. I knew that SOB had a camera in there. I’m going to the police.”
DJT On JRE
Donald John Trump’s appearance on Joe Rogan Experience premiered while I was watching The Glenn Show, featuring John Hamilton McWhorter. I am a longtime fan of Glenn & John, even if I am bored by the inevitable race-talk. This weeks episode was especially galling, with JHM offering pro-Israel arguments that made no sense.
JHM’s anger was directed at The Message, by Ta-Nehisi Paul Coates. I have not read TM, despite the best efforts of JHM, and his fellow travelers. Finally, Glenn Cartman Loury made a comment that forced me to take notes: “I read the book. I urge people to read the book. We’re gonna sell the book here whether you like it or not.”
I was going to write a tweet about the clip, and I decided to illustrate it with an edited screenshot. While I was working on this, I started to listen to DJT. Some people have a life on Saturday afternoon.
DJT has been the target of enormous amounts of hate over the last nine years. Lately, this negativity provokes the opposite effect with me. (This should not be confused with support for DJT.) The Trump-bashing comes across as politically motivated projection. The tortured logic, the lies, the hypocrisy, the lies, the flaky prosecutions, the lies … it is getting very old. The problem here is with the haters, and not the hated. Preaching to the choir has its limits.
There is no shortage of negative things you can say about DJT. Unfortunately, crookedness and incompetence do not have the power to incite hatred as “racist.” America’s political discourse is being poisoned by this cynical appeal to prejudice by Democrats. When the rhetoric shifts to “If you vote for Donald Trump, then you are a racist.” … then you are pitting American against American. All of this divisive rhetoric is so we can elect a different AIPAC-owned politician.
The Washington Post is in the news today, because they are not endorsing a candidate. In 2016, WAPO spread the ridiculous story that the KKK endorsed DJT. WAPO shamelessly trashed DJT, on behalf of Hillary Rodham Clinton. Maybe not endorsing a candidate will do less damage.
The DJT/JRE conversation was not that interesting. I listened to about an hour, until I got tired of the obvious lies. This incontinent bullshitter is just as boring as his haters. DJT did say one noteworthy thing about politics: “You know what’s funny. You need at least the attitude of a comedian when you’re doing this business.”
The election is November 5, which is not a minute too soon. DJT has numerous flaws. Unfortunately, Kamala Devi Harris may be worse. Both DJT and KDM support Israel’s reign of terror against Gaza and Lebanon. I am going to vote my secret ballot, and hope for the best.
Battery
I took my brother to Walmart this afternoon. The car battery struggled, and I resolved to get it tested later. When I tried to go home, the vehicle would not start.
The first move was to call a wrecker, to come boost me off. This would mean a two hour wait, and $108.00. The next move was to ask a taxi to help me. They all refused. One lady drove me down to my car, in the parking garage, and when she saw what I wanted, drove off.
There was a man collecting shopping carts. He suggested I go upstairs, get a battery charger, and take it back when I was through. I decided to try getting a battery instead. Since I did not know what type of battery to get, I took a picture of the old battery. This turned out to be useless in the store.
The first battery had a anti-shoplifting tag. I went to customer service to pay, and have it taken off. Ahead of me in line was an argumentative man trying to return merchandise without a receipt. When I go to the line, a man said that I could not buy the battery, for some reason. I went back in the store, and got another one.
The battery had a core charge, which I could redeem for the old battery. I decided to install the new battery there. I took the old battery off, and learned that the new battery was too big for the vehicle. I went back in the store, and could not find one that looked like it would fit.
I decided to boost the old battery with the new battery, and go to the parts store. I called the wrecker company to cancel my service call. Since I was downstairs, with no cell phone reception, for most of the time, they might have already called, and gotten no answer.
When I got to the parts store, I asked to use the restroom. I wanted to wash my hands. The man took me in the back, past a maze of shelves and work benches, to a very, very basic bathroom. The lady who took my order went outside, and installed the second new battery. I took the first new battery back to Walmart, and got a refund. Pictures today from The Library of Congress.
#WhyIWrite
#WhyIWrite is trending on twitter today, the #NationalDayOfWriting. A lot of the tweets are the sanctimonious, pseudo-inspirational crap that you might expect. A few others are posting inspirational thoughts by famous authors, usually with a picture in the background. Posting memes about writing is not the same as writing. Especially when the famous author never said it.
@girlsreallyrule “In honor of this National Day on Writing, I submit this quote from Dorothy Parker, who sums it up perfectly. #WhyIWrite” This tweet gets the party started. The *quote* was a bit of photoshop nonsense that I have written about before. There is no source for the quote, “I hate writing. I love having written.” (If someone knows a source, please leave a comment.) I left a comment. @chamblee54 “Dotty never said that. An old school manual typewriter only produces one size of text. I have learned when someone says _____ _____ perfectly, then the object in question is full of errors.” When writing this report, I clicked on the link to the original tweet. “You are blocked from following @girlsreallyrule and viewing @girlsreallyrule’s Tweets.”
The next meme is blamed on Ben Franklin. “Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.” Quote Investigator has a report on this Benjaminism. It turns out that the real quote is better than the meme. “If you wou’d not be forgotten, As soon as you are dead and rotten, Either write things worth reading, or do things worth the writing.”
@Gaming_agent99 “You can make empires rise from ashes. You can make heroes fall and villains rise. You can bring all your thoughts and ideas to life, what’s more fun than that. #WhyIWrite” This thought was illustrated by a C.S. Lewis meme. “You can make anything by writing.” Once again, the manual typewriter produces perfectly centered text, in two sizes. @chamblee54 I searched the C.S. Lewis wikiquotes. I used make, anything, and writing as search words. This quote did not appear. @chamblee54 #WhyIWrite I found this in my search “The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed.” The Magician’s Nephew (1955), Ch. 10: The First Joke and Other Matters.
@simpsonlibrary posted a tasteful graphic featuring this quote: “I think all writing is a disease. You can’t stop it.” William Carlos Williams. I had never heard of Dr. Williams, and thought the quote was real. Usually, the less famous the name, the greater the chance that the quote is legitimate. A bit of research turned up page 498 of The Collected Poems of William Carlos Williams: 1939-1962. Dr. Williams had translated Fragment 31 of Poems in Folio, by Sappho. “I’m 73 years old. I’ve gone on living as I could as a doctor, and writing poetry on the side. I practised to get money to live as I please, and what pleases me is to write poetry.”
“I don’t speak English, but the American Idiom. I don’t know how to write anything else, and I refuse to learn. … All my life I’ve never stopped thinking. I think all writing is a disease. You can’t stop it.” Pictures today are from The Library of Congress. This is a repost.
October 2023
I was looking for something to post, and I noticed something. The 2023 October posts have not been logged in. This is going to be my first chore for today.
Last week was a doozy. I took my desktop to the computer shop to have Windows 11 put in, and Zefir sold me a new tower. It seems that the hardware requirements for W11 are an obstacle, and a new toy was needed. A new system is always brain damage, but Zefir was able to transfer most of the old regime to the new kingdom. It was as seamless as transition as I have ever seen. … Doraville’s Delta Computers is highly recommended.
That was monday/tuesday. On Wednesday, the anticipation began for Helene. Thursday night, I thought this might be our last day in this house. Friday morning came with no electricity, but an intact house. Many others fared much worse.
There is much gratitude, to go with the horror at what happened elsewhere. This is along with the new phase of Israel’s race to world demolition. Yesterday brought an Iranian attack on Israel. Nobody is sure where all this is going to go.
The monthly blog inventory is a fairly brainless operation. The pages are loaded 10 to a page. (This is going to get confusing. It is ok to skip a few paragraphs.) You open every one in a separate tab. Then, you go back to the end, and start. Hit the page. Click F6 to highlight the url. Ctrl+C to copy url. Alt+tab to go to the list page. Ctrl+V to paste the url. Make a note of where the pictures came from: gsu, loc, poem, c54. Alt+tab to go to the pages page. Ctrl+Page Up to go to the next page. Repeat steps one through eight.
If you do it right … big if … the mouse is not touched. It is important to stay focused, and not look at any of the pages, no matter how cool. Just stay focused and machine like, and make as few mistakes as possible. And mark the monday pages. The monday post text is never repeated, and is a handy source of pictures for future use.
The operation went smoothly, with a minimum of brain damage. Strategy Of Causing Atrocities is the post that stands out. SOCA was published October 27, 20 days after another escalation in the Gaza – Israel conflict. I thought, and still do, that this might be our last day on planet earth. …
“Around 1987, I was working with Steve. He was the son of holocaust survivors, and an ardent supporter of Israel. We were discussing the war between Iran and Iraq. The I-I was a long bloody affair. The United States supported Iraq, led by Saddam Hussein. The United States, with help from Israel, was also selling weapons to Iran. It was a confusing time.”
“I mentioned to Steve the notion that the US wanted to keep the I-I war going, because it would keep those two countries from fighting Israel. Steve started to get angry. “Yes, and it’s for your benefit. We have to fight terrorism.”
“The I-I war continued for a while. In 1990, Iraq invaded Kuwait, partially in a dispute over war debt from the I-I war. Saddam Hussein went from being an American ally to the next Hitler.”
“Today is October 27, 2023, 35 years after my conversation with Steve. The world is a different place. The last 35 years have been full of wars, and rumors of war. The Internet is a routine part of life. Unfortunately, Steve is not with us. Cancer claimed him in 2001, 9 days after 9-11.
A few days ago, Bob Wright had a conversation with Eli Lake. Mr. Lake is an ardent supporter of Israel. After 69 minutes, Mr. Lake said this: “because the Palestinians continue to think that a strategy of causing atrocities will eventually convince Jews to leave a country.”
Pictures today are from The Library of Congress. Marjory Collins took the photographs in August 1942 “Brooklyn band of Italian-Americans, after playing at Mott Street flag raising ceremony in honor of neighborhood boys in the United States Army, retiring to a neighborhood bar out of the rain.”
X Anniversary
Waking up on Sunday morning, X greeted me: “It’s your X anniversary! Celebrate with a special post created just for you …” What was the first tweet?
@chamblee54 @AcmeCastingAtl chamblee54 has too much spare time. 6’5″200 gray hair white male 8:46 PM · Sep 22, 2010 · @chamblee54 having to change your password the second time you use a service is not a good sign 12:38 AM · Sep 23, 2010
Five years and one day before the first tweet, the first blog post saw daylight.
The first post It had to happen sooner or later. This is my first post to this blog. Maybe I should start with a summary of my life . I am 51yo, 6’5″190# single white male residing just outside Chamblee GA. 50 hours ago, the owner of the company I was working for called me into the office, and said “I am gonna have to let you go, there is not enough work to keep you.” I had been there 13 days. I still don’t know which end is up. More later..
I had gotten into the lamentable business of arguing with strangers online. To make a comment, an account with Blogspot was required. This created Chamblee54. The blog moved to WordPress in 2008, where it resides today. The account I trolled in 2005 has been deleted. Pictures are from The Library of Congress · selah
Race-Rot
America clearly has a problem of color. One way view to this racial dysfunction is as a unified quagmire, rather than competitive hating of wokeness and racism. This approach does not offer any easy solutions. We need to treat people with kindness and respect, no matter what adjective you put in front of people. As a man named King said, “can we all get along?” This is a repost.
I recently wrote about Flannery O’Connor. She was a gifted storyteller, who posthumously run afoul of “whiteness studies and critical race theory.” (This was in 2020, when CRT was respectable. Today, CRT is demonized by some, while others say “thats-not-what-it-means.”) The story cited an essay by Alice Walker, who grew up in Eatonton GA, a few miles up hwy 441 from Andalusia. “The magic, the wit, and the mystery of Flannery O’Connor I know I will always love. I also know the meaning of the expression “Take what you can use and let the rest rot.” If ever there was an expression designed to protect the health of the spirit, this is it.” We can call this dysfunction Race-Rot.
One of the nastier parts of Race-Rot is name calling. There are a pair of six-letter slurs. One starts with r, one ends in r. One I am forbidden to say, while the other I am forbidden to not say. The mentionable slur is racist. You know what the other one is. We would be better off not using either six-letter slur. People enjoy using six-letter slurs, so this is not going to happen anytime soon.
I am a certified white person, of Scottish and Irish descent. I am from Georgia. My great-grandfather fought for the Georgia State Troops, in the War Between the States. This affects the way in which I approach Race-Rot. I see that racism is a problem, and find the bungling efforts at fighting racism … aka wokeness … to be incredibly annoying.
The problems with racism affect millions of people every day. One could reasonably ask, what is wrong with being against racism? The problem is not that you are fighting racism, but the way you are doing it. The trouble with wokeness includes disrespect, fallacious logic, indifference to collateral damage, inflammatory rhetoric, hypocrisy, name calling, and a host of other micro/macro aggressions. The list could go on for a long time.
This is not a comprehensive look at Race-Rot. There are many layers to this onion. Racism and wokeness (RAW) are only part of the picture. The story of Black and White has many shades of gray. We could spend hours talking about Race-Rot, and only be more angry and confused when we are done. The best thing to do now is present some photographs, from The Library of Congress.
We are all God’s children, not a walking six-letter slur. Be kind to each one. Please don’t shout.
Chamblee54 
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