Chamblee54

This content was originally published July 4, 2009. … They called it BYOM … bring your own machete. The plan was to meet at the bridge over the tracks on Piedmont Road, just north of the park. Next, go down to the proposed beltway path and clear out enough weeds to make a hike the next week feasible. I got to Ansley Mall a bit before 10, and found what looked like a shaded parking spot. The sidewalks were full of people leaving the end of the Peachtree Road Race. I hung out by the bridge, and waited for hikers. Finally, a few minutes before giving up, Angel showed up. …
… I asked Angel if what we were doing was legal. Angel said he thought so, and the police were probably busy with the Road Race. Within a few minutes the other four choppers had arrived. I said that someone needs to be first, and started down the hill to the tracks. I had brought some loppers, and very quickly found them to be useless. I had a small pair of hand clippers that I used. Clearing weeds from those tracks with hand clippers was like draining a swimming pool with a coffee mug. This process very quickly resembled work. …
Even though it was mild (by Atlanta July standards), I was soon light headed and covered in sweat. After a while, one person got out a small saw, and gave me his machete. Swinging a machete was also a workout, and I despaired of making much of a dent in the greenery. It was the plant kingdom against the animal kingdom, and the plants were winning. The good news was, with six people hacking at the underbrush, a surprising amount of progress was made. Before long, the troops reached the Montgomery Ferry Bridge, which was the turnaround.
This content was originally published July 31, 2010. … Phlash goes to the Prospect Party by Phlash Goober. Phlash was facing another evening reading about rich people, who have affairs and commit murder. Since the Prospect Party was nearby, Phlash decided to go. When he found the place, the first thing he noticed was the food. There were lots of soft drinks, and hollowed out watermelons filled with chunks of fruit. The obligatory spinach dip was there, as were pigs in blankets, and chips and dip. Phlash had already eaten dinner, but that seldom stops him. Phlash was getting a touch bored, until he started talking to a prospect. …
… “H” and Phlash have a mutual friend, and this gave them an excuse to chatter. “H” had just gotten back from Clemson, South Carolina, where there are orange tiger paws painted in the roadway. Did her car got scratched? Phlash went outside, and decided the music was too loud for conversation. He went back inside and saw his friend “Lawrence”. They discussed pictures of horses and non-synchronistic coincidence. Phlash stepped outside again. The music made his glasses rattle in their frames. He went back inside and saw the former Miss Tall International®, “Queen of Siam”. …
… Phlash saw his onetime camping friend “Pro-A”, who liked to talk. Phlash was getting reckless by this time, and a talking person, no matter how enthusiastic, is preferable to “Play that funky music white boy” at migraine level. “Have you read any good books lately, Pro-A?” As fate would have it, “Pro-A” had just finished a tome about Catherine the Great, a Russian Czarina, that Phlash was blissfully ignorant about. Still, he was a good sport, and listened for a few minutes, until someone interrupted this foodside chat with news about the new sneaker for Lesbians, the Dyke-EE. …
… At this point, Phlash came upon a conversation about Indian Food, vegetarianism, flatulence, and Bean-o. Phlash agrees with the concept of Bean-o, but wonders what people will do for after dinner amusement. Meanwhile, the music outside was turned down a notch, after houseplants complained about the noise. All this time, the hot tub had been bubbling away, inviting all the tallfolk into the waters. Phlash followed, just in time for a stimulating conversation about ugly bridesmaid dresses. At this point, Phlash got dressed, grabbed one last handful of pretzels, and went home. … After publication, the party hostess was offended by this article. … Pictures today are from Special Collections and Archives, Georgia State University Library. The social media picture was taken January 1, 1949. Alberts Cancellation Shoes, 240 Peachtree Street, Atlanta. Today, 240 Peachtree is the Atlanta Merchandise Mart. · selah ©Luther Mckinnon 2025