Chamblee54

Bead 091 Wayan Nuriyasih, the lady healer, and Miss Gilbert are chit chatting. Tutti, the daughter of Wayan, is playing with a blue floor tile. She found it at a construction site, and would like to have bathroom with tiles like that. Miss Gilbert gets an idea.
This comment is for a youtube video, ELIZABETH GILBERT Talks About Eat, Pray Love. I’m from India and I can’t believe how fucking condescending the movie was on our country. Cmon we are the largest democracy in the world with fucking brilliant scientists from IITs. Its not all yogis and elephants you know! How’d Americans feel if the world only talked about how great Disneyland is…. no. America is great because of Clint Eastwood and Abraham Lincoln and Benjamin Franklin and Ernest Hemmingway. Don’t belittle another nation its easy but ultimately crowds your own vision.
Bead 092 Miss Gilbert has an idea. She goes to an internet cafe, and sends a message to her friends. The story of Wayan Nuriyasih is told… the divorce, the healing work, and the daughter who wants to be a veterinarian. Miss Nuriysih lives in a series of rented spaces, and every few months she has to move. The email asks for donations, to help Wayan Nuriyasih buy a permanent home. Soon, $18k has been collected.
Facebook is currently full of, among other things, a type of graphic art which can charitably described as commodity wisdom. Someone thinks of a funny / inspiring / motivational phrase, and pastes it in front of a picture. The only way you can share this thought is to copy the image. PG is fond of people who express their bright ideas in paste friendly text. The paragraph below is a happy exception to the overall trend.
[Image Description: A Willy Wonka meme, which shows Gene Wilder depicting the character of Willy Wonka, from the film Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, leaning their head on a fist and smiling at someone. This meme is used to convey a sarcastic comment. The text surrounding the Willy Wonka’s face reads “So you think gay couples should be able to get married?” at the top, over Wonka’s head. Below, it reads “Oooooooooh, thaaaaaanks.” I created this meme using the program at MemeGenerator.net to convey a sarcastic response to what I perceive as an ineffective statement from President Obama on “gay marriage” in light of the latest developments in North Carolina and the passing of Amendment One, which got signed into the stated constitution, banning marriage between same-sex (in the conventional, sex-structure essential definition of “sex”) couples. This legislation was written in such a way that it affects adoptive parents, foster parents, and single parents, and the families of all of such persons. It is an affront on a nation that ensures equality for all in it’s Constitution.]
Bead 093 While the money is coming in, Miss Gilbert is spending time with Felipe. They talk about a wide variety of subjects, including the concept of Miss Gilbert taking a lover. One night, Felipe starts to give Miss Gilbert a good night kiss. She tucks her head into his chest, and allows him to hold her.
These quotes are from the twitter feed‏ @Kurt_Vonnegut. Apparently he is in a place with internet access. ~ Busy, busy, busy. ~ I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, “If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is.” ~ Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made sense from things she found in gift shops. ~ There is a tragic flaw in our Constitution, and I don’t know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president. ~ How embarrassing to be human. ~ Say what you will about the sweet miracle of unquestioning faith, I consider a capacity for it terrifying and absolutely vile!
Bead 094 Ketut Liyer, the wise old medicine man, was the reason for Miss Gilbert coming to Bali. His company gets put to the side amidst all the excitement in her life. Miss Gilbert asks him what he thinks of romance, with the reply that he is too old. It seems as though the old lady, Nyomo, that Miss Gilbert thought was his wife, was someone else. Nyomo is the wife of Ketut’s brother, who helps out with running his household.
There was an online article, How Elizabeth Gilbert Ruined Bali. Ubud has been overrun by middle aged women seeking meaning for their privileged lives. There is a popular T shirt, with the slogan “Eat, Pay, Leave.”
Two filmmakers” I met from California tried to interview Ketut Liyer, one of Gilbert’s traditional Balinese healers in the book. Instead they were handed a copy of the book and directed to read aloud certain passages while Liyer listened.”
Bead 095 Miss Gilbert tells Wayan Nuriyasih about the $18k. She does not know how to react. An Indonesian bank account is set up to receive the funds.
In the Q TV interview, Miss Gilbert says that when you are childless, you are constantly expected to defend that choice. She wonders if perhaps it should be the opposite, and that those who reproduce should always be expected to defend that choice. To PG, the analogy is when you quit drinking, and people say that you have a problem with alcohol. This is odd. To not use an addictive substance is seen as “having a problem”.
Bead 096 Felipe is taken to meet Wayan Nuriyasih, and she approves. Felipe is taken to meet Ketut Liyer, who reads his palm and approves. An affair is suggested, but Miss Gilbert is not ready to make the leap. A solitary night is spent, and a paragraph about masturbation written. When Miss Gilbert wakes up, she is happy to be alone.
A movie was made from Eat, Pray, Love. Julia Roberts played Miss Gilbert. Miss Roberts is from Smyrna, GA. This is across the Chattahoochee River from Chamblee, if you throw in a few exits on I 285. Once, a young man said to his bf, kiss me where it is dark and stinky. He took him to Smyrna.
Bead 097 After making her dinner, Felipe told Miss Gilbert that it was time to go into bed. She agreed with him.
There is a saying, a environmentalist is someone who built his cabin last year. What follows is a comment from How Elizabeth Gilbert Ruined Bali. “Man, I have been in the past and soon will again be an expat living in Asia, and I can translate the sentiment of this article in one paragraph: “All of these tourists (who are not me) are totally ruining the (my) authentic experience of living here. It sucks that everything’s getting so commercial (I prefer it when the locals are quaintly impoverished, and there are no businesses around except for the ones that I like). All of these foreigners (except me, because I’m different) need to get out of here (so me and my friends can be the only super-special foreigners around. Also, nice caftan-wearing middle aged ladies are 10,000 times better than asshole foreigners who get drunk and puke on people’s doorsteps, start fights, INCITE RIOTS (like that British guy in Thailand), support violent criminal organizations by buying drugs and supporting the local sex trade, are condescending and rude to locals and just rude to other foreigners, and then think they’re superior to nice caftan-wearing ladies because they’re young and have a dick, which makes them cool like Kerouac instead of old and lame like middle aged people with vaginas.”
Bead 098 After the breakthrough with Felipe, Miss Gilbert goes on a road trip with another man. It was planned that wasy. Her friend Yudhi misses the highways of America, and wants to do a road trip. Of course, Bali is the size of Delaware, and the roads are horrible. Still, they rent a car, buy junk food, and drive around the island talking in what they think is cool dude slang.
It is funny what an audience will laugh at. This is from the Elizabeth Gilbert TED talk “. So that’s reassuring, you know. But it would be worse, except for that I happen to remember that over 20 years ago, when I first started telling people — when I was a teenager — that I wanted to be a writer, I was met with this same kind of, sort of fear-based reaction. And people would say, “Aren’t you afraid you’re never going to have any success? Aren’t you afraid the humiliation of rejection will kill you? Aren’t you afraid that you’re going to work your whole life at this craft and nothing’s ever going to come of it and you’re going to die on a scrap heap of broken dreams with your mouth filled with bitter ash of failure?” (Laughter) Like that, you know” TED audiences think it is funny for a hardworking author to die a bitter, lonely death. That is odd.
Bead 099 When Miss Gilbert gets back from her road trip, she gets in bed with Felipe, and does not leave for a month.
This is from the Elizabeth Gilbert TED talk And for me, the best contemporary example that I have of how to do that is the musician Tom Waits, who I got to interview several years ago on a magazine assignment. And we were talking about this, and you know, Tom, for most of his life he was pretty much the embodiment of the tormented contemporary modern artist, trying to control and manage and dominate these sort of uncontrollable creative impulses that were totally internalized.
But then he got older, he got calmer, and one day he was driving down the freeway in Los Angeles he told me, and this is when it all changed for him. And he’s speeding along, and all of a sudden he hears this little fragment of melody, that comes into his head as inspiration often comes, elusive and tantalizing, and he wants it, you know, it’s gorgeous, and he longs for it, but he has no way to get it. He doesn’t have a piece of paper, he doesn’t have a pencil, he doesn’t have a tape recorder.
So he starts to feel all of that old anxiety start to rise in him like, “I’m going to lose this thing, and then I’m going to be haunted by this song forever. I’m not good enough, and I can’t do it.” And instead of panicking, he just stopped. He just stopped that whole mental process and he did something completely novel. He just looked up at the sky, and he said, “Excuse me, can you not see that I’m driving?” (Laughter) “Do I look like I can write down a song right now? If you really want to exist, come back at a more opportune moment when I can take care of you. Otherwise, go bother somebody else today. Go bother Leonard Cohen.”
Bead 100 Good times must be paid for. Miss Gilbert comes down with a nasty bladder infection. Wayan Nuriyasih has the cure. After fixing the ailment, Miss Nuriyasih tells about some of the therapies she performs. It seems like some couples have a problem making babies, and it is very dangerous to tell a Balinese man that he is impotent. The solution is to have the woman go for treatment in a special clinic. Young men are recruited from the village to assist. The woman is soon pregnant, and everyone is happy.
This was found on facebook. I think the remains of the recent emotional cataclysm are gone. Got up, gave myself an amusing haircut, did some watering and transplanting on the Flats, and went for a long (by recent standards) run in the lovely morning. Clomped along, concentrating on the green, the growing, the flowering, the scented, and when I came to a particularly generous patch of sky, looked up and said, “Wow, And it’s all MINE.” I’ll share, of course. So, yeah, back to reasonably happy. Then a bird shat on me.
Bead 101 Felipe points out that Miss Nuriyasih has not bought a house yet. This might be a problem.
Maybe it is time to actually write something, instead of just pasting in text from facebook. There are someimes things to say. Just because you are tired of a project, and will be overjoyed when it is over, does not justify laziness. What if Christopher Columbus had taken that attitude when he was three fourths of the way to the new world. The native americans wish he had.
But then, this was on facebook, and fits in with the rest of this post. People who say “America, love it or leave it” have clearly never tried to get a residence permit in another country as an American. It’s not that easy! It will take me 5 years to qualify for a resident visa in Thailand, and I’ll have to pass a language test to prove that I can speak, read, and write Thai. I can, so bring it on. But People who claim USA is the best country in the world should try living in another one for a while first! Especially one where redneck English is not the national language! That is all.
Bead 102 Wayan Nuriyasih throws a party to celebrate Miss Gilbert’s thirty fifth birthday.
This was found on facebook. [Image Description:A yellow-shaded representation of the face of Malcolm X, a civil rights revolutionary fighter, with purple text to the left side of their face, reading, “Don’t be in a hurry to condemn a man because he doesn’t know what you know, or think as you think, or as fast. There was a time when you didn’t know what you know today.”]
Bead 103 The business of buying a house, or land to build a house on, is complicated. Buying property is a mine field of legal trickery in almost any country. In Bali, it might be worse. Even if the property is for sale, and the price is right, and the seller really has a title for the land, Miss Nuriyasih has to approve the taksu or spirit, of the land. At one point, she needs to go to a temple, to ask for guidance, but cannot enter the temple because she is having her period.
This is from the Elizabeth Gilbert TED talk Transcripts are the slack blogger’s friend. But, the tricky bit comes the next morning, for the dancer himself, when he wakes up and discovers that it’s Tuesday at 11 a.m., and he’s no longer a glimpse of God. He’s just an aging mortal with really bad knees, and maybe he’s never going to ascend to that height again. And maybe nobody will ever chant God’s name again as he spins, and what is he then to do with the rest of his life? This is hard. This is one of the most painful reconciliations to make in a creative life. But maybe it doesn’t have to be quite so full of anguish if you never happened to believe, in the first place, that the most extraordinary aspects of your being came from you. But maybe if you just believed that they were on loan to you from some unimaginable source for some exquisite portion of your life to be passed along when you’re finished, with somebody else.
Bead 104 Miss Gilbert is becoming comfortable with Felipe. She also decides that she does not want to live in Bali. The ex-pat lifestyle is not for her.
Seen and duly noted on facebook ~ Message to someone on okcupid who said they are looking for a partner in crime: “How perfect – I’m looking for a partner in crime too! See, I just killed these three hookers and I need a place to hide the bodies. Any ideas?” ~ When I’m feeling down or stressed, I can interpret almost anything as “proof” that I am unlovable (or that other people are unloving). But if I remember that my thinking will change when my mood changes, I can laugh at my moods and give myself some loving acceptance. Ironically, accepting the bad mood helps me move out of it. ~ Dear FB Buddies . . . Watch your wall. Tell your friends . . . Hackers are now on FB writing insults on your friends’ walls, such insults of which are made to appear as having come from you. You don’t know nor see it but your friends do. As a result, they have deleted you from their list of friends. I want to assure you that if you get something supposedly from me that’s offensive, it certainly didn’t come from me. Copy and re-post PLEASE ~ d racecard is a palindrome ~ PG, I came up with the ideaq for 911 and the Patriot Act. I gave the idea to a C.I.A. agent and the rest is history. This happened in 1986.
Bead 105 There is a ritual performed by Ketut Liyer. A baby is six months old, and has not touched the ground. This is the custom. At six months, there is a ritual, with prayer, chanting, and relatives wearing their best clothes. At some point, the baby’s feet touch the earth.
These comments are for the video Afternoon with Ketut Liyer. Once again Im balinese, tiang nak bali .. saya orang bali. This old man is a lier, I went there to his place in Ubud and He was trying to sell painting which is you can get ib local market for 30-40 US$ and this old guy Tried to sell for 200 US$, and whatever he said its bullshit. He said that me and my girlfriend will be rich n good business.And he said that Im a faithfull person in front of my girlfriend, in fact I have cheated on my girl friend for over than 4 times.please becareful with him ~ and we should believe in you, who cheated to your girlfriend for more than 4 times? :) ~ Ketut Liyer just a character the same like us, He just try to make people happy with what he said to you, he could be lying to, but whos care as long he said something good about you. Im a balinese and my family generation is BALIAN other said Priest or Shaman or Medicine man whatever you call,also we are the Blood of Bali King Sri Nararya Kresna Kepakisan, Never in my Family Generation teach us to read Hand Gesture or Line.
Bead 106 It finally becomes apparent to Miss Gilbert that Miss Nuriyasih is playing games with her. An ultimatum is made, and the property is bought within hours.
With Eat, Pray, Love winding down, PG is wondering what he will read next. The Chamblee library does not have the best selection, and requesting a book online seems like a lot of work. A facebook friend faced a similar dilemma, and asked for summer reading suggestions.
If you want “to be at the limits of what has been thought in relation to your discipline you should read Kant’s Anthropology from a Pragmatic Perspective, and try it in the original German just 2-3 pages a day. Then read Foucault. I cannot believe you have not read your Foucault. Discipline and Punish is a benchmark of the social sciences, he walks around prisons and writes poetry about their history and social functions/capacities. The Order of Things by Foucault is a master piece. ~ Look, Colin, Foucault hurts the part of me that does thinking. I do not have the capacity yet to read Foucault without a quiet screaming slowly starting in the back of my mind. ~ That’s because you have to relearn how to read. You approach thinkers like him like you would read a poet. You don’t examine them for their propositional truth claims so much as to the relationships they are making with the questions that arise or that you have, some of which there are no answers for because they are the very limit of what can be thought with the relationships we have, and some answers are practical.
Bead 107 Miss Gilbert and Felipe go on a vacation. The location is an island, Gili Meno. Miss Gilbert had been there before. This was during the first trip to Bali, which coincided with divorce trauma. This is where she first wrote in her magic notebook, and G-d wrote back to her, using her own hand. This is the same hand that played a prominent role in bead 096.
A man named Saint Anthony went on a spiritual retreat once. He was visited by angels that looked like devils, and devils that looked like angels. He could tell one from the other by the way he felt when they left. If he was happy, it was an angel. If he was angry or sad, it was the devil. PG has few illusions about the people who wreak emotional havoc because of Jesus.
Bead 108 Felipe tells Miss Gilbert that he needs to stay in Bali, because of his business. They will work something out.
Miss Gilbert later married Felipe. This shotgun wedding was forced on them by US officials. In this video, Eat Pray Love’s Elizabeth Gilbert on Q TV Miss Gilbert discusses the evolution of marriage. Historically, marriage has been arranged, for the benefit of the families involved. The concept of a man and woman choosing to marry, because of love, is a recent innovation. It is seen as dangerous by some, and divorce rates have increased as this custom has become more prevalent.
This comment was made about the Q TV video. “The 70’s misandry, man-hatred, and sense of entitlement have only mushroomed. Deeds and comments that were “radical” and “hateful” in the 70’s are mainstream today. Elizabeth Gilbert is the norm. Millions of American women would do the exact same selfish whore things if they had a large advance on a big book deal. This has always been true of women but even more so toady.”
This is the end of Eat, Pray, Love. Thank you for reading this. Parts one, two, three, four, and five were previously published. Pictures for this post are from “The Special Collections and Archives,Georgia State University Library”. Selah

Bead 055 Miss Gilbert decides to stay at the noname ashram the entire time she is in country. The original plan had been to stay a few weeks, and then do the tourist thing. She sensed that there had been progress, and it was best to build on it. The rest of her life was available to see India.
Part three of this cycle was posted at two in the morning. The hours before the publication were full of activity. When PG got up the next morning, he felt a bit let down. It took most of the day to work through this emotional fatigue.
Bead 056 Even though she is making progress, Miss Gilbert sometimes is reminded of how far she has to go. One morning while meditating, she wonders what color her meditation room was going to be painted. The next step is to try Vipassana meditation, which is an orthodox version. These guys think that using a mantra is cheating.
After dinner one night, Miss Gilbert decides to try Vipassana. A few thousand mosquitoes joined her. The bites gave her a challenge to overcome, and the evening turned out well.
Some say no pain no gain. Sometimes this is true, You can become stronger by ignoring the aching muscles. On the other hand, sometimes pain is a signal that you should lay off. You could be damaging your body/mind/soul by continuing. To be able to tell the difference is more wisdom than many people have.
In 1990, PG had a herniated disc. The L5-S1. He didn’t know how to deal with it, and sciatica developed. An opportunity to go camping on Cumberland Island came up. PG didn’t think he would ever have another opportunity to go, and decided to be tough and deal with the pain. It was a mistake. He was able to recover from the disc problems, but the trip made it much more difficult. Sometimes, pain is a signal to lay off.
Bead 057 Miss Gilbert talks about G-d and faith.
“Rats and roaches live by competition under the laws of supply and demand; it is the privilege of human beings to live under the laws of justice and mercy.” – Wendell Berry. That is the plan. The reality is that folks live by the laws of rats and roaches, but think they live by the laws of people privilege. The fun starts when they expect privileged behavior from their neighbors.
Bead 058 This is about prayer, and the banishment of unhealthy thoughts. Miss Gilbert is not going to have unimportant prayers anymore. To a G-d that deals with famine, plague, and the Republican Party, just about any prayer from a privileged divorcee is going to seem unimportant. But it is important to Miss Gilbert, and that is what this book is about. After she is done, the next step is to choose her thoughts. Seven hundred times a day, she says to herself “I will not harbor unhealthy thoughts anymore”.
PG read this a few hours before he wrote about it. His mood swings had been getting worse, with giddyier highs and crashing lows. He was in a bad mood, wondering if his knee would ever quit hurting, wondering if he would ever work again, wondering why on earth he was reading this silly book. Maybe, if he sees it through to the end, it will be worthwhile. If nothing else, it will be a good writing exercise.
Bead 059 When Miss Gilbert is scrubbing the floors of the temple, she talks to Tulsi, an Indian teenager. She is almost 18, which is the age for arranged marriage. She will go to a wedding, wearing a white sari, and somebody’s aunt will come to talk to her, and ask questions. What University are you going to? How much money does your family have? What is your birthday? What are your interests? If the aunt likes the answers, including astrological charts, the girl’s father will be asked if his daughter wants to marry the nephew. This is how they do it in India, and Tulsi does not look forward to it.
In the current debate about gay marriage, some talk about the state of marriage for the last six thousand years. What these people don’t tell you is that arranged marriage is far more common than today’s “traditional marriage”. The concept of a man and woman getting married because they love each other is a fairly recent innovation. In the history of the world, far more marriages have been set up by the families, with no say so from the bride and groom.
Bead 060 The friends of Liz Gilbert are tired of hearing about her busted marriage. Apparently, telling herself to banish unhealthy thoughts seven hundred times a day isn’t working out too good. One friend leads her into this tower, and hands her a list of ten rules for freedom. They all say “let go”, some with more accesorization than others. After she reads the list, she stays in the tower and creates a ritual to help her get over the divorce. “If you bring the right earnestness to your homemade ceremony, G-d will provide the grace. And that is why we need G-d.”
PG has the habit of reading while he eats. The problem with this is reading material like bead 060. It is very rude to throw up in a public restaurant.
Bead 061 Richard leaves the ashram to go back to his home state. He tells Miss Gilbert to find another man.
PG got a phone call from a committee promoting an election scheme. The idea is to raise the sales tax, and use the money for transportation projects. While few would disagree that the roads in the Atlanta area are a disaster, PG is increasingly annoyed at the tactics of the pro tax people. First it was the robocalls. Today, there was a lady, calling for what she said was a survey. There was only one question, and then a sales pitch for the tax scheme. The lady threw made a statement, and asked if that would encourage PG to vote for the scheme. PG said that he didn’t believe the claims the lady was making. The election is sometime in July, and there is going to be a lot of noise made about the tax scheme. If PG votes for the scheme, it will be in spite of, not because of, the phone calls.
Bead 062 Miss Gilbert decides she talks too much. The rest of the time at noname ashram, she is going to be “That quiet girl”.
While the Murray Hill baseball team was losing to the Lincoln Giants, a negro organization, its lockers were pilfered by persons unknown. // The McKinney brothers capsized on Croton Lake. One, unable to swim, seized the other, who could, by the neck. Both gone a hundred years now. // The soothsayer at Coney Island predicted Giuseppe would marry Josephine. But not that, two weeks later, he would gas himself. // At 167th Street, a man in a fine black suit, handkerchief monogrammed H.O., separated, with a train’s help, his head from his body. // Parsons, a lawyer, holds the speed record between New York and Albany. Or rather, “held,” since he is no more. // On East 109th Street, with a wooden bat, Andreo Reso struck, as though it were a ball, the head of his neighbor Frank Fuculora. // Thank you Teju Cole.
Bead 063 One the day after she takes a vow of silence, Miss Gilbert recieves a new work assignment. She is to be “key hostess”. This will require her to have a bubbling personality, and do lots of talking. Somebody, somewhere, has a sick sense of humor.
There is a sundial in Rome, with an inscription in Latin, OMNES FERIUNT ULTIMA NECAT. It refers to the hours that are measured by the sundial. The rough translation: all of them wound, the last one kills.
Bead 064 OK, so maybe being That quiet girl was not such a great idea. Miss Gilbert is going to go forward, maybe speak a little bit less, maybe interrupt less, and just maybe be a better person.
In the bloggingheads talk, Miss Gilbert talks about her days as a magazine reporter. She was often not a nice person. She went in for the cheap joke, the touch of gratuitous snark. As she got older… in moments such as bead 064… Miss Gilbert realized that these were good people she was making fun of. In many ways, they were better people than her. It was much more challenging to write a complimentary piece about someone that you find to be peculiar.
Bead 065 Miss Gilbert describes her duties as the key hostess. There will be two groups coming to the ashram for one week visits. Miss Gilbert will greet them, answer questions, and basically be the cruise director. This is not what she had in mind when she took a vow of silence.
Miss Gilbert writes from a woman’s point of view. Anyone who doubts this should listen to this segment. “I was looking forward to the movie, and then I bought an Oscar de la Renta gown to wear to the premiere, and now I am escatic. It’s all about the dress”.
Bead 066 Most people spend their lives in three states of consciousness… waking, sleeping, and dreaming. A fourth state is turiya, an elevated state that is achieved through religious practice, among other things. Some disciplines say there are more states after that, each more elevated than the one before. The lack of conciousness alteration if one of the frustrations PG feels with Jesus worship.
In 1979, PG wound up in a moonie camp. Camp K was a former Girl Scout camp, located outside of Santa Rosa CA. On Tuesday, the speaker gave an answer to a question, and PG realized that he could not stay with this community. The next day, he got three nickels, and threw the hexagram for the I Ching. One of the lines said ” Go back to your old, “inferior” live with renewed energy and purpose” (not an exact quote) PG took this as an indication that he should leave, which he did on Saturday morning. He was soon back in Georgia, just as slack as ever.
Bead 067 While mentoring the guests, Miss Gilbert wants to watch over them, and put aside thoughts about her own spirtual development. One day, as if by magic, she was transported on the collective efforts of her pilgrims, and wound up in a transcendent state.
While typing the previous sentence, PG started to spell development devilopment. Devil. The bad G-d. Christians claim to be monotheistic, and wind up worshiping a variety of critters . The preacher at redo blue called PG the devil on a number of occasions. If only PG had heard the radio show with Depak Chopra, he would have had the right answer.
Mr. Chopra was promoting a book, and made an appearance on a radio show. The radio man repeated stated that Jesus Christ was his lord and savior, and was rather rude to Mr. Chopra. Finally, without raising his voice or showing anger, Mr. Chopra said “what you say says more about you than it does me”.
Bead 068 The seekers came and went, and Miss Gilbert was given an office job for the rest of her stay. She spends her time meditating blissfully and fooling around with eucalyptus trees.
PG has heard the phrase tree hugger, and has a slight problem with it. In Georgia, many of the trees are pines. If you hug a pine tree, you will be covered in pine sap, and broken bits of bark. It will be unpleasant. Another problem is the vibes from pine trees. They take over a piece of recently cleared land with aggressive enthusiasm. They produce a low quality wood. If you want to feel the essense of a tree, find a willing tree, and put the palms of your hands, on both sides, a few inches away, until you can feel the vibes from it. There is much less cleanup than if you hug one.
Bead 069 Sixty nine is a much loved number. It is twenty three times three. It represents a form of mutually cooperative union. The two numbers are similar, with a circle at one end, and a semi circle on top. Six has the complete circle at the bottom, and the semicircle goes to the right. Six is conservative. Nine has the circle on top, and the flare goes to the left. Nine is liberal. If six turns out to be nine, I don’t mind.
Once Anita Bryant was attacked by a protester, who threw a fruit pie in her face. She was being interviewed for Playboy magazine at the time, and the reporter found the box the pie came in. It cost sixty nine cents. The reporter made a joke about it, and Miss Bryant claimed not to know what he was talking about.
In EPL, Miss Gilbert finds a word in Sanskrit, antevasin. This is a person who lives on the border, who leaves a village to go live by the city limits. Miss Gilbert feels a kinship with this word. She does not want to live where everyone else does, but is not ready to be a hermit in the woods.
Bead 070 You should be wary of a chapter where they make a blanket statement about all the world’s religions in the first sentence. Miss Gilbert burns a few brain cells making generalizations about religion. There is an interesting mistake. The story goes that in 1954, the Catholic Church sent a group to Libya. The instructions were ” DO NOT think that you are going among infidels. Muslims attain salvation too. The ways of Providence are infinite”
Miss Gilbert credits those instructions to Pope Pius XI, aka Ambrogio Damiano Achille Ratti. This gentleman died February 10, 1939. The Pope in 1954 was Eugenio Marìa Giuseppe Giovanni Pacelli, who answered to Pius XII. He was the Pope during World War Two, and became a controversial figure. Some say he could have done more to help save Jews.
Bead 071 On her last night in the ashram, Miss Gilbert stays up in a meditation cave.
I have an inspiration blog and i think it’s great the way people express themselves on tumblr. i appreciate the photography and quotes for the beauty and truth they present (although other times, i just reblog stuff because the look nice and there’s nothing wrong with that as well). you are entitled to your own opinion and it’s nice that you’re honest, but there are people out there that do genuinely enjoy those blogs. and just for the record — some of the things i’ve seen on tumblr really have inspired me. i’m more optimistic and it’s nice to know there are people out there that think and look for the same things i do. it’s a nice community to be in (except for those bloggers that only care about gaining followers or becoming tumblr famous).
Bead 072 When she leaves the ashram, there are two poems placed before a picture of Swamiji. One was written early in the stay, and is very cynical. The second was written just before leaving, and is very happy.
Yes, the Republican primary was like a very entertaining circus, but when you get down to it, most people who vote will not be consoled that the robot won out over the clown.
Chapters one, two, and three have been published. Pictures are from The Library of Congress. These are Union soldiers from the War Between the States.

Classic Rock Stories: The Stories Behind the Greatest Songs of All Time is due back at the Chamblee library today. If PG is going to do a book report, now is the time.
This is what you might call a concept book. Assemble a bunch of stories about rock songs, gussy them up with graphics, and sell it. It was written in 1998, which makes it ancient itself. It was worth the effort to take home from the library, and read while warming up the car.
A few of the stories are fun to hear. The original lyric to Friend of the Devil was “It looks like water but it tastes like wine”. Lou Reed says it is your fault if you took Heroin after listening to his song. Mark Farner prayed to G-d to give him a hit record, and woke up in the middle of the night and wrote I’m your captain.
Some times censorship does not work. Steppenwolf wrote The Pusher and used GD in the properly… G-d, send this terrible person to hell. Some preachers in North Carolina objected, and the police told the band not to say the offending phrase. When they did the song, John Kay kept his mouth shut, and turned the microphone to the crowd. The audience knew the line. When the time came, they shouted  GD the pusherman.
Elton John knew the value of publicity, and has been eager to talk. Funeral for a friend was something Elton would want played at his funeral. He likes sad music, especially about dead blondes. Fellow singer Rod Stewart was offered a role in Tommy, and Elton advised him not to take it. A few months later, Pinball Wizard was offered to Elton, and the three foot tall platform shoes made a splash. Rod never forgave him. Elton thought Bennie and the Jets was a very strange song, and was surprised that it became a hit.
Sometimes it is best to ignore conventional wisdom. Soon after the second CSNY album came out, four unarmed students were killed at Kent State University. Neil Young wrote “Ohio”xx, and the band came out with a single within days. The suits thought that “Teach your children”xx was going to be the hit on that album.
Stories get told about bands and songs. When Wont Get Fooled Again came out, PG was told that Pete Townshend met someone, and invited this person to his hotel room. Before long, it was discovered that what seemed to be a she was really a he. In this book, Mr. Townshend said that it was revolutionary tough talk.
Early in their career, Lynyrd Skynyrd was playing four shows a night, and did not have a lot of material. When they played Free Bird, they tried to make it longer and longer. It is generally easier to pad out one song than to write two more. Another long wonder, In a Gadda da Vida, started out as “In the garden of eden”. The singer drank a gallon of red mountain wine, and the rest is history.
Robert Plant hates Stairway to Heaven
Not As Advertised January 8, 2012 D. Turner
Lots of blank space for such a small book and really not all that interesting. I’ve read dozens of books about Rock history, and this collection is one of the weakest to date. Frankly, I’d be embarrassed to even loan this book to a friend, and would not recommend it to others.
Writen in One Afternoon August 8, 2000 vonhayek
Stories? I don’t think so. The “story” behind each song is simply a quote or two. The author didn’t want to be burdened with the task of actually writing anything. And the quotes are frequently brief. The “story” behind Fleetwood Mac’s “Go Your Own Way,” for instance, is all of four lines. This is book is mostly air. And as for “Classic” Rock, I humbly submit that songs like “Substitute,” “That Smell,” “Treat Me Right” by Pat Benetar have not exactly been labeled “classic” by anyone but Morse. I think what happened here is that Morse spend an afternoon on Nexus running searches for a bunch of songs and came up with a miscellaneous series of quotes from  Rolling Stone. I feel ripped off.
Pictures are from The Library of Congress.

Bead 019 It was a glorious Sunday afternoon. PG called Uzi, woke him up, and suggested they go to the 420 festival. This is a neighborhood shindig in painfully trendy Candler Park. Uzi is going to drive to PG, who will drive them downtown. In the half hour or so before the company arrives, PG is going to try and knock out a few beads of this book report.
PG and Uzi have a basic disagreement about how to go places. PG likes surface roads, and Uzi prefers interstates. When PG is going west on i285, he gets on at Glenridge Road. Uzi lives off Abernathy Road in Sandy Springs. The idea of taking the interstate to Uzi’s place strikes PG as insanity. To Uzi, surface roads provide access to the freeways. However, on this sunday, four lanes of I285 are shut down for road work. This is a good day to take surface roads. PG briefed Uzi on the way to go, and hopefully he will not get lost.
This is a good bead to warm up with. Miss Gilbert notes that she has not done yoga since arriving in Rome. The yoga mat will go unused until she arrives in India. It is noted that yoga rhymes with toga.
Bead 020 Gomer Pyle had a saying. His grandmother taught it to him.“Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver, and the other gold”. This bead is about the friends that Miss Gilbert has made in Rome. Her favorite is a tax accountant named Luca Spaghetti.
PG was writing something once, and did not know how to spell spaghetti. Spi and spe were the logical choices. The dictionary did not yield results with either prefix. Finally, PG got out the yellow pages. He found a restaurant called the Spaghetti Store. And he has known how to spell spaghetti ever since. Since then, spell check has made this skill obsolete
Bead 021 This bead is about the pursuit of pleasure. Italians are reputed to be better at this than uptight white americans. Miss Gilbert is trying. The only museum she has visited is the museum of pasta. There is the time when she gathers a few items at a market, takes them to her place, and conjures up a meal. This is what Italians call l’arte d’arraniarsi … making something out of nothing.
There are three basic devices for playing with text… bold, underline, and italic. PG has long exploited bold and underline for breaking up text into bite sized chunks, but has a long standing reluctance to italicize. Historically, italics have been used to set apart languages other than English. The paragraph above may be the first time PG has put anything in Italics. The fact that it is an Italian word, in a book report about Italy, is a coincidence.
Bead 022 Miss Gilbert has come to Italy to pursue pleasure, but is determined to be celibate. To some, this is a contradiction. To her, it makes sense. She is recovering from a traumatic divorce, and technically still dating a toxic bf. She has been continually in relationships for years, and needs a break.
This is one arena where PG and Miss Gilbert are dramatically different. At a discussion group on Saturday, someone asked PG when his last relationship was. It was in 1988, and PG still feels he was fortunate to have had that. When you are a Zorlack, it is tough to connect with earthlings. In that same group, someone asked PG what he thought when he got off. The answer was “where is the paper towel”. This got a good laugh, but is technically not true.
Bead 023 Luca Spaghetti took Liz Gilbert to a soccer match. This is a serious sport in Italy. She sits in front of a man who expands her knowledge of Italian cusswords.
It is ironic that the word used here to describe the sport is soccer. The word is an american abomination, short for association football. The rest of the world calls it football, or the local equivalent. It is odd that Miss Gilbert goes to Italy to wallow in the language, and then uses a clumsy american phrase to discuss the european obsession. According to answers.com, soccer is sometimes called calcio (pronounced “kahltsho”) in Italy. This answer was sponsored by a listing for a urologist.
Bead 024 Liz Gilbert sees learning Italiano as being locked into a candy store. Every day is a new treat, many of them unexpected. It turns out that tree and hotel are similar in Italiano. When Miss Gilbert says she grew up on a christmas tree farm, people wonder what a christmas hotel is, and why it is grown on a farm. The favorite words so far is attraversiamo, which means “Lets cross over”. The chance to use this word sometimes means diving into the most deadly traffic in Europe.
PG has always wondered why languages have a different name is other languages. We say spanish, until we go to Buford Hiway, where it is espanol. Italian is italiano, german is deutsch, portoguese is portogues. It is one more reason to try esparanto.
Bead 025This bead is about a walking tour of Rome. Miss Gilbert set out strolling, not knowing where she was going to go. In many cities, this can be dangerous. The finale was Augusteum, a grand mausoleum built for one of the Caesars. It has fallen into disrepair, and is now partially buried under the dirt of the ages.
April 25 is ANZAC day. This is a remembrance of the young men who were slaughtered at Gallipoli. This siege was ninety seven years ago, and not one person out of ten thousand can tell you why. Yesterday was Armenian Genocide Remembrance Day. It is a shame when a people’s sacrifice is remembered in proportion to their skill at publicity.
Bead 026 The Italian postal service is not efficient. Miss Gilbert shipped a box of books to Rome, and is wondering when they will arrive. Some of her friends say not to worry, it is in the hands of G-d. Nothing humans can do will affect it.
The same can be said about the critters that regulate spam. PG got two invites to join an internet service today. They were from the same person, who is a nice man that PG is not in close contact with. One of the invites was addressed to Luther, and one to Cam. PG’s “real” name starts with Luther Campbell. Most of his life, he has been called Cam. In the last two years, he has started to use Luther. The name of the person connected to the invites is Ed, who calls PG Cam.
Bead 027 Miss Gilbert takes her friend Sophie on a day trip to Naples. The line in corny movies is see Naples and die. The ladies give it their best shot. They do to a place said to have the best pizza in Naples, and possibly the world.
There is a picture with this feature of a Checkers hamburger stand on Buford Hiway. In an act of mercy, this facility has been closed. When Miss Gilbert went to Italy to eat fabulous food, PG went to Buford Hiway to get gutbomb (spell check suggestion:gumbo) burgers.
In 1994, Richard Nixon died. The liberal media did not have him to kick around any more. One day PG noticed an enormous flag at half staff. It was at Checkers. PG was probably the only person who made the connection.
Bead 028 The rebound bf is David. Miss Gilbert can’t live with him, and can’t live without him. One day, she sends him an email to break up. Later in the day, she receives a reply, telling her that he agrees this is the best thing to do. Miss Gilbert then gets a phone call from Giovanni, wondering where she is. Miss Gilbert starts to cry hysterically when she tries to tell Giovanni the story. He is totally sweet and understanding, but does not kiss her.
One problem with writing on a computer is the distraction of the internet. You never know when you are going to miss something on facebook. Like this: I think the remains of the recent emotional cataclysm are gone. Got up, gave myself an amusing haircut, did some watering and transplanting on the Flats, and went for a long (by recent standards) run in the lovely morning. Clomped along, concentrating on the green, the growing, the flowering, the scented, and when I came to a particularly generous patch of sky, looked up and said, “Wow, And it’s all MINE.” I’ll share, of course. So, yeah, back to reasonably happy. Then a bird shat on me.
There is an old saying … I don’t know whether to shit or go blind. Ray Charles said to use ex lax.
Bead 029 Miss Gilbert has one sister. She is older, knows more things, and is named Catherine. For a long time the two did not get along, but finally are starting to bond. Catherine comes to Rome to visit Liz, and they go for an educational romp around the city.
In the last sentence, bond was originally typed bone. E is above d on the keyboard, and this is an easy mistake to make. Bonding and boning are similar concepts, but different in some crucial ways. If it turns out that the sisters are boning each other (is that possible without male participation), then the movie will be a lot more fun.
Bead 030 This bead is about children. Miss Gilbert thought for a while that she wanted them, and then decided that she did not. There is an attic apartment awaiting her in sister’s house, and a future as the family flake. This is not an appealing prospect. Perhaps she can write blog posts. It is good to remember that easy writing makes tough reading. Stream of consciousness is a lot more fun to write than to read.
Bead 031 Miss Gilbert drops out of Italiano (spell check suggestion:Totalitarian) class, and starts to travel with a vengeance. Meanwhile, at his group on saturday night, someone asked PG where he would go if money was no object. This threw PG for a loop, because travel fantasy has never been a part of his lifestyle. This might be a function of being perpetually single. If you don’t have anyone to go with, what is the point of going anywhere. The one dependable travel companion PG has is Uzi, and they are limited to road trips within a few hours of Atlanta. Finally, after stumbling and harrumphing, PG said he might enjoy going back to Seattle, to see where he had been in 1980.
Bead 032 The next stops on the tour are Florence and Venice. A friend from Seattle joins the show in Venice. In contrast to the rhapsodies about Venice that Erica Jong dispenses, Miss Gilbert seems to feel sorry for the place.
PG saw Erica Jong give a book tour talk once. It was in a former foreign car dealership in Buckhead, that enjoyed a second life as a bookstore. The audience was very feminist, full of women who got off on asking questions that included the f word. She did not say anything about Venice.
In March 1990, Tom Robbins made an appearance at the same Buckhead bookstore. PG got there after the reading, and saw the line of people getting books signed. At one point, Mr. Robbins stood up, and turned around, the the delight of manbutt admirers.
When PG got home from seeing the levis of Tom Robbins, there was a message on his machine. A longtime friend said he had something important to tell him. He had aids. Two years later, when PG got back from Amsterdam , there was a message from longtime friend’s mother.
Bead 033 There is a concept that you can choose one word to describe a major city. For Stockholm, conform. For New York, achieve. For Atlanta, marketing. For Rome, sex. All caps are used in this chapter, but PG is tired of shouting. When everyone is shouting, nobody is heard. People think that their wonderful opinions become more true when they express them with more volume.
The original version of this paragraph ended with the words “PG begs to differ.” When the image was saved and previewed, the word differ was on a line by itself. This is known as a widow, and looks bad. PG decided to eliminate the phrase, “PG begs to differ”. When someone begs to differ, that phrase can usually be eliminated without affecting the meaning of the paragraph.
The images for this feature were originally edited to a four to three format. They were intended to fit the monitor of PG’s computer, which was set to 1024×768. In the time since then, PG has discovered the joys of the golden rectangle. This means that pictures 720 pixels wide will be 447 pixels tall. This is the golden mean, a size which mathematicians sing the praises of. The golden mean is quite possibly an Italian discovery.
Bead 034 The nickname for Silvio Berlusconi is l’idiota. When an American talks about George Bush, Italians say they have one too. In this chapter, Luca Spaghetti has an american style thanksgiving for his birthday. It turns into a tearful, drunken feast.
The pictures for today’s post come from a variety of places. PG takes his camera wherever he goes, and then edits the results. Sometimes the folders are full of usable material. Other folders have a good picture or two. A few months ago, PG reviewed the list of folders, and put an x beside the ones that did not have a lot of good material. While picking pics for this post, PG took images from seven folders deemed not worthy of use. It is a dog’s breakfast, with shots taken in Piedmont Park, the Flying Biscuit, the Norfolk Southern tracks, and a restricted property.
Bead 035 All of this decadent eating has a cost. Miss Gilbert cannot fit into any of her clothes. She buys some jeans for the remaining time she will be in Italy. Soon, she will be an Indian ascetic, and losing weight will be relatively easy.
While assembling this feature, PG dropped by an arrogant Jesus worship blog. The blog has a device where you can check on a star, or number of stars, to “rate” the post. Since PG is banned from commenting at this facility, he clicks one star, usually without the unpleasant experience of reading the post. Nothing personal, just business. The blogger is question (or is that questionable blogger?) observed this rating. “And the first rating: 1 star! I’m looking forward to the one-star rating army to come and tell me how shameful this post is — I hope they can enumerate the shamefulness for me so I can improve myself in the future.”
PG sent a tweet in reply “@Frank_Turk Maybe if you allow one star reviewers to speak they could tell you why.” The absolute worst thing that could happen is for the ban on commenting to be lifted, and to invite PG to “enumerate the shamefulness.” If this was to happen, then PG would be required to read the post in question.
Bead 036 In the last bead about Italy, Miss Gilbert goes to Sicily and eats fabulous food. Part one of this cycle was posted a few days ago. PG is beginning to wonder if this chapter by chapter business is really a good idea.

Bead 109This story starts when PG heard a TED talk, Atheism 2.0. The TEDder, Alain de Botton, said “Okay, we’re not going to have new TED. We’re just going to run through all the old ones and watch them five times because they’re so true. We’re going to watch Elizabeth Gilbert five times because what she says is so clever,” PG had seen a bloggingheads episode with Miss. Gilbert, and she seemed like a pleasant enough person. A few weeks later, as if by magic, a copy of Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman’s Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia showed up on the new book shelf at the Chamblee library.
The first chapter described the way the book was to be organized. There is a prayer bead device in India called japa malas. It is a string with 108 beads, and is used in meditation. It is the forerunner of the rosary. Ms. Gilbert decided to divide her book into 108 chapters. This is a magic number. It is three, to the third power, multiplied by two, to the second power. PG read this immediately after writing a post with 108 lines.
PG has written chapter by chapter impressions of books before. It has been a while, and EPL seemed like a good candidate. If it gets too corny, there is no obligation to finish. The PG chapters may only have the slightest resemblance to what goes on in the book. It will be an excuse to write. It is also a good way to read a book.
Bead 001 Ms. Gilbert is in Italy. This is the first part of her year abroad. She has a friend named Giovanni, who she is hot for. She also thinks it would be a bad move to fool around with him. In this chapter, she goes to dinner with Giovanni, and goes back to her room, alone. Before she goes to bed, she offers a prayer of thanks.
When PG hears the name Gilbert, he always thinks of a gas station attendant in Florida. It was one of the last family vacations, before PG got to be old enough to stay home. The family went to Panama City, to a hotel run by Ora Lovelady. At the gas station en route, the man looked at mom, and said “She putts me to mind of one of the Gilbert girls, from DeFuniak Springs.” Dad thought this was hilarious, and told the story dozens of times.
Evidently, Elizabeth Gilbert was born Elizabeth Gilbert, and stayed that way. The last post of the eat-pray-love-fans blog was Hyperion cancels book by Elizabeth Gilbert’s Ex-Husband. His name was Michael Cooper. Her current husband is José Nunes.
Bead 002 In this chapter, Ms. Gilbert time trips back a few years, to the time before her marriage fell apart. She realized she did not want to have a baby, nor did she want to be married. The trouble was, no other options were very appealing. She decided to pray about it.
As regular readers of this blog know, PG is not a Jesus worshiper. Nor is he an atheist. The concept of prayer can be very appealing, and seems like, at the very least, it could not hurt. And yet, after the turmoil kicked up by Jesus worshipers, PG just cannot bring himself to pray. The person, who had the most spiritual influence on PG, snarled “I’m going to pray for you brother” out of anger. This, and many other incidents, makes PG unwilling to try prayer. If you get drunk on a particular kind of whiskey, and have a horrible hangover, you never want to even smell it again.
Another problem is the question, who is prayer directed to? Beliefs about G-d are like assholes and opinions… everybody’s got theirs. The best concept that PG has heard is the one from the lecturer at a Moonie camp. The value of the chemicals in the human body is estimated to be anywhere from six to a hundred dollars. And yet, no white coat chemist can combine these elements to make a person. To the moonies, G-d is the difference between a human being, and six dollars worth of chemicals.
There are other ways to express this concept. Some see G-d as the software, or the DNA, of the universe. Others say her domain is limited to earth. Gustave Flaubert is credited, by G–gle , with the saying “G-d is in the details.” Maybe G-d is the whirlwind that blows through a junkyard, and creates a jet engine. Some say G-d and man are indivisible, others say they are separate. PG is only sure of one thing. G-d does not write books. (To those who say prayer should come from the heart, and not the head … the pain Jesus has caused PG is felt in the heart. Mental pain is easier to rationalize away.)
Bead 003 Ms. Gilbert goes paddling up a tributary in this chapter, talking about what she means by G-d. At the end, she believes in a magnificent G-d.
A few hours ago, PG put eight tomato plants in the ground. While walking back uphill, to the one part of the backyard that gets sunlight, PG decided to have a few words for G-d. Any help you can give will be appreciated. Lets see if we can do better than we did last year. When you get tired of sending rain, send more rain, and then more. The people in Texas can dry up, just don’t let any more of their governors get elected President. Just because Jimmy Carter came from Georgia, that doesn’t mean Texas can get uppity. This was not said in anybody’s name. PG wonders why anyone would talk to G-d in somebody else’s name.
Bead 004 Liz is still in the bathroom of her fabulous home, praying away. Finally, G-d speaks to her, and tells her to go to bed.
A few years ago, PG had a job driving a truck in Cobb County. When he was stopped at a red light, next to the Big Chicken, he would talk to G-d. One time, the question was “why does Jesus hate me?”. The answer was “I don’t know”.
Bead 005 The story of EPL is simple. The life of Liz Gilbert is a disaster. This chapter tells a big part of the story. She decides to leave her husband. A rebound bf comes into the picture, and a blissful summer ensues. Then it is September 11, 2001. The divorce machinery is warming up. David, the bf, starts to be a problem. This is not good.
Bead 006 Miss Gilbert’s life is in ruins, but she now has time to do what she wants to do. One thing is to learn Italian. For some reason, the language has always appealed to her. Every new word is a like a piece of candy.
PG is not wired for learning new languages. The first class he ever flunked was ninth grade Latin. In 1996, he bought some tapes and books, and tried to learn Spanish. His mexican friend looked at him like he was crazy. The tapes gave him brain damage. This is living next to a census tract that is 92% hispanic. Outside of “tu trabajo es su credito” at the used car lot, PG is just as monolingual as ever.
Bead 007 This has nothing to do with James Bond. The numbers in the book are single digit, then double digits, then, finally after 99, triple digits. PG got into triple digits when he was working with creating print jobs from files. It just works a lot better with those useless zeros.
Zero is the great improvement of arabic numbers over the roman variety. Even though nothing is nothing, it should take a place when it is time to count. Without zero we would not have negative numbers, nor the existential threat of the square root of negative one.
In this chapter of EPL, David, the rebound bf from hell, introduces Liz to an Indian spiritual teacher. It turns out she lives in India, has an ashram, and no one in New York has ever met her. The mantra of choice is Om Namah Shivaya, which translates as “I honor the divinity that resides within me. Lady Gilbert decides to go to India, and visit the Ashram.
Bead 008 The magazine that Liz Gilbert works for hands her an assignment to go to Indonesia. This was after Barack Obama lived there… the whereabouts of his stepfather were not mentioned in this chapter. While there, she met a Balinese medicine man. “What I want to learn is how to live in this world, and enjoy it’s delights, but also devote myself to God”. Ketut Liyer, the medicine man, showed her a drawing. “It was na androgynous human figure, standing up. hands clasped in prayer. But this figure had four legs, and no head. Where the head should have been, there was only a wild foliage of ferns and flowers. There was a small, smiling face drawn over the heart…. To find the balance that you want, this is what you must become. You must keep your feet grounded so firmly on the the earth this it’s like you have four legs, instead of two. That way, you can stay in the world. But you must stop looking at the world through your head. You must look through your heart instead. That way, you will know G-d”  PG wonders if he could keep this advice.
Bead 009 The divorce drama is getting intense. The ex is refusing to sign an agreement, and it looks like a court battle is eminent. Meanwhile, Miss Gilbert goes on a book tour, with a supportive friend in tow. The friend convinces Liz to make a written petition to G-d, to resolve this divorce business once and for all. The petition is written, and numerous friends and celebrities sign on, by proxy, in a motorcar driving across Kansas. At this point, the cell phone rings. It is an attorney, with the news that the ex has signed the papers.
Bead 010 There is a symmetry to 010, especially when it is preceded by a blank space. Liz Gilbert would be very happy if this bead had been preceded by a blank space, instead of the turmoil of her 911 life. This chapter is the end of the beginning. The divorce is paid for, the properties disposed of, and a handy publisher contributes an book advance. The plan is to be in Italy four months, India four months, and Indonesia four months. It would have been cheaper to spend the time in Indiana, Illinois, and Iowa, but then it would have been called Dribble, Duck, and Eat. It would have a corny ending.
Bead 011 Miss Gilbert eats her first meal in Rome. She quotes a letter by the poet Shelley, who was horrified that women of social rank ate garlic in Italy. After the meal, Miss Gilbert goes to her dwelling and falls asleep.
Today is download day for Chamblee54. If you are going to have pictures from The Library of Congress, then you have to download. The machine pulls down 11mb a minute. The current image is Hoerr’s feed store in Peoria, IL. It was photographed for the Farm Security Administration in 1938. PG has never been to Peoria, IL. An acquaintance of PG named David Wallach used to talk about moving to Peoria, IL, and opening a bar. This was before he killed himself.
Bead 012 The campaign to learn Italian is going full blast. Miss Gilbert will read newspaper articles, and look up every third word. She learns that Italian babies are the fattest in Europe. There is more talk about the fountains of Rome, and the aqueducts that brought all that water into the City.
The day before, PG had gone to a park near his house. Mason Mill park was an abandoned water works. The old buildings are covered with festive graffiti. It had been a while since PG had been there, and going on this day was not really a good idea. On February 8, PG twisted his right knee, and has been carefully rehabbing it ever since. One is carefully with the route, if every step has the potential for pain. As it turns out, some do gooders had been to the park, building concrete walkways and fences. One more neat place has been nannified into bland regularity. And yes, one of the concrete structures had been turned into a fountain.
Bead 013 This is where Liz Gilbert evaluates herself as a traveler. She has her good points and her bad points. The best of her good points is the ability to make friends easily. This might be the weakest of PG’s weak points. He is a Zorlack… the race of people that even the most politically correct feel encouraged to hate on. PG did not ask to be a Zorlack. If he had his druthers, he would still be on Thrunombulax, among critters who understand him. Life is not fair, even if fair is a baseball hit between first and third base. PG is a popup headed into the seats behind the catcher. The good news is that his continued existence is an annoyance to people who need to be both pissed off and pissed on.
Bead 014 The idea of going to Italy is to learn Italian. PG could walk a mile from his house, (if his knee would cooperate) and be in Mexico. This is not what Miss Gilbert wants, so she has to go to Rome, where she will consider doing as the Romans do. She goes to the first day at the Leonardo da Vinci Academy of Language Studies. A test is given, and Miss Gilbert is placed in a level two class. A few minutes into the first session, her head is spinning. A trip to the office is made, and Liz Gilbert is placed in a level one class.
In 1971, the fad in Dekalb county was to have students spend their last year of high school at a community college. Some schools were overcrowded, and saw this as a handy way to get rid of students. PG was just happy to get out of Cross Keys. When it was time to register, you could take English 101, or a remedial class. PG was a good writer, and signed up for 101. The first week of class, PG wrote an essay. The teacher, Ann Peets, read the essay to the class. It was presented as being an example of how NOT to write.
Ann Peets was a great teacher. She said things that PG remembers 40 years later. A woman went to William Faulkner, and said she had read Sanctuary five times, and did not understand it. He told her to read it a fifth time. The best way to win an argument is to use statistics. The best way to get statistics is to make them up.
Bead 015 The bead is about the origins of Italian. It is a good story. PG hopes it is true. This is a problem, when authors take a break from their story to deliver a lesson. You have to trust them to know the facts. Since it doesn’t much matter anyway, PG will believe her.
It seems as though Latin was the dominant language of Europe. As time passed by, the dialects of the regions got more and more different. The language spoke in the dominant city became recognized as the correct version of the language. PG is happy that american english did not adopt New Yorkese as the accepted variety.
Italy was another story, with it being a collection of warring city states most of it’s history. To this day, many wonder if a unified Italy is a good idea. (Is today an abbreviated form of to this day?) So anyway, some fart smellers smart fellers decided to use the language of Dante as the official Italian.
A few months after PG took English101, he got a job on the maintenance crew at Northlake Mall. There was a security dog there named Dante. It was PG’s job to go walk Dante. This was before the office buildings surrounding the mall had been built. Northlake Parkway had a bridge over I285, with woods on all sides of it. Atlanta was a much greener city then.
Bead 016 Depression and Loneliness plugged in a GPS, found Liz Gilbert, and came to pay a visit. This is to be expected. PG calls it the 24 hour syndrome. Typically, about a day into your adventure, you realize that you are the same sorry person as before. You let it pass, and a few hours later you are back in the game.
By contrast, PG is having an excellent day. He rode his bike to the county tax office, chained it to a railing, got his wallet, cellphone, book, and car renewal papers out of the box, and walked into the office. The guard said to go to the lady at the first window. There was no waiting in line. This may never happen again.
Bead 017 It turns out that Miss Gilbert uses anti depressants. The standard story is told…she was staring at her left wrist, with a knife in her her right hand. (This is an invented detail. When you ask Mr. Google if Miss Gilbert is left handed, you are referred to a blog post. One of the commenters said “Take some time, using the left-hand navigation list on their site, and dig into topics you are interested in.” ) So modern chemistry saved her life, la dee dah.
PG never saw any benefit from using pills. Years of self medication with beer and reefer was fun, but PG got bored. It is true, when you sober up, your problems are still there. PG does not rule out chemical depression suppression. It might indeed work for others. It might not work for PG, and the money can be better spent elsewhere.
Bead 018 Part of the maturity process is learning to enjoy cheap food. You can buy a bag of mixed beans at Kroger, divide the bag in half, soak half the beans, and store the other half in an empty peanut butter jar. When the beans have absorbed water, you put them in a pot, and turn the gas on full blast. Set the timer for 4:00, and be prompt about going back to the stove. Turn the heat down to where the blue flames are just barely visible. Put the lid on, with a little bit hanging over the edge so the steam can get out. Set the timer for 33:33. When the timer makes the appropriate noise, go turn the heat off. This is a dangerous process. If you don’t turn down the heat after 4:00, the frothy mix at the top will boil over, and make a horrible mess on your stovetop. (This frothy mix is more edible than Santorum.) If you forget to turn off the heat after 33:33, then the beans will eventually burn, and you will need to evacuate your kitchen.
The other night, PG went to a potluck supper. When he made the pre dinner trip to Kroger, the easter candy was 70% off. PG bought a handful of little chocolate bunnies, only one of which was chosen by a diner. This did not hurt PG’s feelings, who looked forward to having chocolate bunnies to snack on. When it was time for lunch today, PG scooped a serving of beans out of the plastic container, and placed them in the pot. To this he added a little chocolate bunny, which he broke into pieces. After a few minutes of heating, a bean soup, with chocolate bunny sauce, awaited PG.
Ok, this is supposed to be about Bead 018. In this chapter, Miss Gilbert is in panic mode. She is depressed and has run out of Wellbutrin. The answer is to take out a secret notepad, and tell the notepad about her trubbles. The spirit within tells her to write a message, saying that she was loved. Miss Gilbert goes to bed, and all is well.
By amazing coincidence, before he wrote about Bead 018, PG listened to a conversation on BlogginheadsTV. Ross Douthat is hitting the mammon circuit with a new book, Bad Religion: How We Became a Nation of Heretics. (“What’s the point of writing a book if you can’t be a little bit judgmental”) One of the featured segments was The heresy of “Eat, Pray, Love”.
Here is the money quote. (Mistakes happen when PG transcribes.) “Ross Douthat– The problem is, the word I use is narcissism. The peril of having too close an identification between G-d and the self. Robert Wright– You mean she hears G-d as her own voice when she has an epiphany? That it sounds like her talking, is that what you mean? Ross Douthat– Thats what I mean. More generally, it’s the idea that you identify G-d with your most authentic self. ” Mr. Wright has never read Eat, Pray, Love, but he describes the chapter that PG was about to critique.
Pictures are from The Library of Congress. The spell check suggestion for Douthat is handout.

It was an unproductive visit to the Chamblee library. PG looked in the new books, the Georgia history, the A fiction, and the R fiction. He trolled the biographies, and back across the lounge of newspaper readers for another hopeful look through the fiction. Finally, he went to the V fiction. On the bottom row of a shelf, within the reach of small children, was Kurt Vonnegut. A book with the unlikely title Bagombo Snuff Box: Uncollected Short Fiction cried out “Take me home. Cat’s Cradle has a superiority complex that is highly annoying”. PG sighed, shifted the book into his left hand, and headed to the checkout machine.
BSB is a collection of short stories. Mr. Vonnegut (he did not have a middle name) came of age at a time when magazines were thriving, and published short stories. You could make a living doing it. BSB follows the tradition of selling anything you can find by an artist who has become marketable.
The stories are short, and fun to read. None of them tell a country song, even if country songs tell a story. A bartender could knock one out on his bus ride to work, and put the Saturday Evening Post back in his bag. The Norman Rockwell painting approved. Live goes on in Ilium, New York.
A high school bandleader named George Helmholtz makes a number of appearances. Joe Bane, a pawnbroker, turns down a chance to buy a watch Adolf Hitler gave the watch to a Nazi General, before it was stolen by an American POW. In the title story, Eddie Laird gives an old gf a priceless trinket, and she believes the lie. At no time is the phrase and so it goes used.
Some of the stories are not pleasant. 2 B R 0 2 B is about a future where old age and disease are conquered, and the people miss them. As link followers might guess, the tale is available for purchase as a stand alone book. PG tried to be fair, and listened to 8:43 of a audio version of the story, before shutting the tale down in dismay. Nor were amazon reviewers amused.
Should be sold in a collectionJanuary 22, 2011 W. L. LaCroix (Montana)
This is too short to sell separately.
You’re screwing people selling it stand-alone. I’m sure Kurt is rolling in his grave.
Waste of money July 19, 2010 Marty
I’m a big Vonegut fan, but I think this was designed to sucker us in to buying it.
I could swear I read this story in some other collection.
There was only one reviewer at amazon to give BSB one star.
Too good to be trueSeptember 25, 1999 jeffatbdi@aol.com (Southern California)
What a disappointment. KV must need money; it’s the only reason I can see for dragging out this last load of early fluff. It’s not hard to understand why these stories were uncollected up to now. They are all pre-enlightenment Vonnegut and, if you’re a fan of his unique view of the cosmos as expressed in his deep and witty novels, you’re in for a letdown. These stories are a chore to read—some don’t even have endings; they just stop, a bit like KV’s writing career. I heard him tell an interviewer that he’s run out of things to say.
No unfiltered Pell Mell cigarettes were harmed during the writing of this book report.

One of the reasons for the drug problem is drug education. Many of these programs, while well intentioned, make the problem worse.
Courtesy of Awfullibrarybooks, we can see today “LATAWNYA, the Naughty Horse, Learns to say “No” to Drugs“. This uplifting story is about the afternoon when Latawnya goes out to play with her sisters Daisy and LaToya. Suddenly they meet four strange horses, Connie, Chrystal, Jackie, and Angie. They like to drink and smoke drugs. Soon, Latawnya is led astray.
The author of this tale was born in Mississippi, and lives in California. She says “Thank you, G-d”.
In 1986, there was an oversupply of cocaine coming into America, and new ways of using the product were needed. Someone had the idea of making crack. The media did its part, by running scare stories about the new drug sensation. “One puff makes your head feel like it is exploding”. The stories had the combined effect of scaring parents, and making crack cocaine irresistible to certain people. Crack became a part of the life.
The first time PG heard about oxycontin was a drug education flyer at work. It promised an overwhelming rush to the user who injected the substance. PG imagined the reaction of some of the druggies he had known to this promise…where can I get some?
PG is in the detoxed, old fogey stage of his life. Millions of others are not. When they read stories about horses who drink and smoke drugs, they learn to believe the opposite of what the drug educators tell them. Many will not live to be detoxed old fogeys.