Chamblee54

At roughly this time 235 years ago, the colonies told their English authorities to not let the door hit them on the way out. Now, on the verge of the three day orgy of barbeque, fireworks, and sunburn, the stepmotherinlaw from hell reminds us why we took this step. It seems as though Heidi Withers is about to marry Freddie Bourne. After a visit to her future in laws, the stepmother of the groom, Carolyn Bourne, sent an email to Ms. Withers. This message is reproduced in it’s entirety below. It is introduced by a forwarding message. Ms. Withers evidently wanted to share this email with her friends, who are sharing it with the world. There are a few notes before we get started. Bomber is the family dog. The story in Mamamia adds :” Freddie declined to comment. His father Edward Bourne, 63, said: “We have nothing to say.” Heidi’s father Alan has come out and said of Carolyn, “She has her head stuck so far up her own arse she doesn’t know whether to speak or fart.” Here is the email. HT to yahoo. Pictures are from The Library of Congress . Subject: FW: Manners Date: Mon, 20 Jun 2011 08:00:30 +0000 It was so WEIRD yesterday. I was just pulling up at lights at Wandsworth roundabout when Fred and Heidi pulled up next to me! So I followed them to pub for a drink and Heids forwarded me the email from Fred’s step-mum- she wants it be be spread around as much as possible! Take a look at the below- you won’t believe it! xxxxxxxxxx From: Carolyn Bourne [mailto:Carolyn@whetmanpinks.com] Sent: 10 May 2011 06:51 To: Heidi Withers Subject: Manners Heidi It is high time someone explained to you about good manners. Yours are obvious by their absence and I feel sorry for you. I am being kept awake – or woken early – by Bomber who is so profoundly upset by your behaviour on your recent visit that he is depressed and anxious.Unfortunately for Freddie, he has fallen in love with you and Freddie being Freddie, I gather it is not easy to reason with him or yet encourage him to consider how he might be able to help you. It may just be possible to get through to you though. I do hope so. Your behaviour on your visit to Devon during April was staggering in its uncouthness and lack of grace. Unfortunately, this was not the first example of bad manners I have experienced from you. If you want to be accepted by the wider Bourne family I suggest you take some guidance from experts with utmost haste. There are plenty of finishing schools around. You would be an ideal candidate for the Ladette to Lady television series. Please, for your own good, for Freddie’s sake and for your future involvement with the Bourne family, do something as soon as possible. Here are a few examples of your lack of manners: When you are a guest in another’s house, you do not declare what you will and will not eat – unless you are positively allergic to something. You do not remark that you do not have enough food. You do not start before everyone else. You do not take additional helpings without being invited to by your host. When a guest in another’s house, you do not lie in bed until late morning in households that rise early – you fall in line with house norms. You should never ever insult the family you are about to join at any time and most definitely not in public. I gather you passed this off as a joke but the reaction in the pub was one of shock, not laughter.      I have no idea whether you wrote to thank Georgia for the weekend but you should have hand-written a card to her. You should have hand-written a card to me. You have never written to thank me when you have stayed at Houndspool. Georgia has quite the most exquisite manners of anyone I have ever come across. You would do well to follow her example. You regularly draw attention to yourself. Perhaps you should ask yourself why. It is tragic that you have diabetes. However, you aren’t the only young person in the world who is a diabetic. I know quite a few young people who have this condition, one of whom is getting married in June. I have never heard her discuss her condition. She quietly gets on with it. She doesn’t like being diabetic. Who would? You do not need to regale everyone with the details of your condition or use it as an excuse to draw attention to yourself. It is vulgar.As a diabetic of long standing you must be acutely aware of the need to prepare yourself for extraordinary eventualities, the walk to Mothecombe beach being an example. You are experienced enough to have prepared yourself appropriately.No one gets married in a castle unless they own it. It is brash, celebrity style behaviour.I understand your parents are unable to contribute very much towards the cost of your wedding. (There is nothing wrong with that except that convention is such that one might presume they would have saved over the years for their daughters’ marriages.) If this is the case, it would be most ladylike and gracious to lower your sights and have a modest wedding as befits both your incomes. One could be accused of thinking that Heidi Withers must be patting herself on the back for having caught a most eligible young man. I pity Freddie. Carolyn